Why Should We Suffer In Silence?
by Elvis-Stitch
Summary: ZADR. It's been bottled up inside of Dib for so many years, so why has it taken him so long to realise? Will it be too late for Dib when he finally does? Mild swearing/sexual content and themes. Will spruce up later on. Read and Review please. No flames.
1. Five Years

**A/n: **Officially my first IZ fanfic! Well, thats a lie lol, I have a few more currently in progress. This is going to be ZADF/ZADR. No flames please. Be sure to R&R! :D  
And now, on with the story!

I don't own Invader Zim or any of the characters associated with it. The marvelous Jhonen Vasquez does.

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**Chapter 1**

Dib's P.O.V

Five years.

That's how long it had been since that faithful day he'd stepped into our seventh grade classroom. Black hair, green skin, not to mention no ears or a nose. I knew almost instantly he wasn't human, I mean, really, it wasn't that hard to see. Or so I thought. Apparently the rest of my classmates thought the opposite. A 'skin condition' he'd claimed to have and they lapped it up like a dog sucking pitifully up to its master for a bone. Gullible and naiveté. That was all our society was. And that was all it would ever be.

Of course, they thought nothing more of me than the 'crazy' kid, so in a way I wasn't surprised when they'd turned on me and my opinions. It wasn't like they mattered. Who listens to the insane kid that's obsessed with the paranormal and seeing ghosts and aliens?

_First they ignore you, then laugh at you and hate you. Then they fight you, then you win._

The line replayed itself in my head as I sat listening to my MP3. I couldn't begin to describe to myself how much I could relate to it. Only I hadn't won yet, but someday I would, even if it meant another five years of hatred, insults, mocking and stupid arguments which would lead to one of us getting hurt in the end.

He was like that. _Zim._

He had such a high ego that even if he looked like the fool, he'd have to find someway around it. He was narcissistic. And though I hated to admit it, cunning. He'd outright fooled me a number of times. More than I could count, actually. Our brooding desires to outwit each other had dragged out for five long years and in that time he STILL hadn't managed to conquer Earth. For that I was thankful, but couldn't help but wonder what the hell was taking him so long. He had all this powerful alien technology, yet he hadn't managed to wipe out even one building yet.

I knew that something was holding him back, only I didn't know what. And I'd wondered that very same question for the past three years.

Turning to look across to him, I adjusted my glasses slightly to peer over the head of Zita and towards that dark mop of fake hair. He still wore the same disguise, though his wig had become somewhat shaggier. That same pink tunic I'd seen him arrive in, he also still donned, only now it had lengthened to fit his slender, somewhat anorexic frame. The back hem hung loose a little below his hips, like even that itself had been too big for him. Same boots, same gloves, same contacts. The only real difference to him was his height. Despite he was still much shorter than the average student, he now stood at 5'3". I myself was 6'1". It was something to be proud of. Well, for me at least. It certainly made _him_ scowl whenever I towered over him. Man did I feel good when I saw his features scrunched up like that. Stupid alien.

I hated him. I hated him _so_ much, yet for five straight years I could not stop obsessing over him. _Stalking_ him even, as some of the other students had put it to me. I had documented his every move, every turn, every _twitch_. To me he was just a science project waiting to be dissected. An autopsy table was where he belonged, not here in this stink of a classroom. It was only _then_ would they see. See that I wasn't the crazy kid with the black trench coat and odd shaped glasses, but the sane one all along. Boy could I imagine the looks on their stupid faces when I proved them all wrong! But like many other things, that was only a dream and it was going to be a long time before that became a reality.  
_  
'It's time to stop living in this fantasy-land of yours, son! Follow my footsteps and discover real science!'_

I scoffed at the thought of my father. Some father. I can't even remember the last time I saw him. He was always busy with his work, down in his lab discovering some radical new cure to save the world. I couldn't say I hated him, he was my father after all, but some part of me had stopped feeling the love I once felt for him long ago. Then there was my sister. Man.

I laughed out loud a little to myself at the thought of Gaz, causing a few of my classmates to snigger. She was _my_ baby sister, but she controlled me. Quite a few times I'd hear the death threat from her. She hated my clothes, she hated my enormous head, she hated the fact I even _existed. _What a family. In some ways Zim was lucky.

He had nobody. Well, there was that robot dog thing he had, but family wise, no. Unless those 'parents' he had counted, but I had learned long ago they were only robot decoys.

I often wondered what life would be like without a family. I had almost started to believe it would be better, but I honestly couldn't imagine my life without Gaz or my uncaring father. It was my life after all and not anybody else's. Despite I hated it, I couldn't say that I would want to change it. After all, imagine viewing Zim for what he was through another's eyes. Ha, I couldn't even _imagine_ being like one of those blind idiots I had for classmates.

I snapped out of my thoughts when I felt something hit the side of my head. Looking down, I saw a paper ball on the floor and reached down to pick it up. One guess who that had come from. I opened it and sighed at the almost unrecognizable scrawl before me. You'd think that after five years Zim's hand writing would have improved. Then I remembered he had three fingers.

_**Dib-stink is looking rather brain-dead today.**_

I scowled and grabbed my pen, scribbling back.

**What the hell would you know, Space-boy?**

Scowling, I threw the note as hard as I could back at his obnoxious green head. It hit him directly below where his 'ears' would have been and he nearly fell out of his chair in shock. I stifled a laugh, but was cut short as our teacher strode into the classroom. She was no Bitters, but her glare almost caused the same amount of fear to spark within me as she turned her icy gaze towards me.

She was the Bitters cousin. That, or her sister. Niece. Whatever.

"Dib, do I sense the need to fail you for the rest of the semester?"

I shook my head. Zim snorted, but as usual, she didn't notice. Damn I hated him.

"One more sound from you, I will be tempted to."

"Yes Miss Sowourz."

Seemingly satisfied, she started to unpack her bag for the lesson ahead. I could sense Zim's eyes boring into my head and looked towards him. He was grinning and holding another note and before I could open my mouth to silently protest, he threw it at me, hitting me square in the eye. I almost yelped, but caught myself just in time. I didn't need another after school detention. Scowling again, I picked up the note, which had thankfully managed to land on my desk this time and not the floor. Despite his stupidity, Zim had good aim.

I unraveled it to see what was written this time.

_**Five hundred more lifetimes worth of knowledge than yoo could ever know, hyooman worm-baby. I AM ZIM!**_

Man! Even though it was his _writing_ I could almost hear that voice ringing in my ears! Zim just grinned at me from his seat and pointed to his head. I did the same, except I made the 'you're crazy!' gesture and twirled my finger around. He rolled his eyes, and looked back towards the teacher.

My gaze lingered on him for a little longer, before I turned back to the teacher, who was now starting the class. I found that I just couldn't pay attention to her today for some reason, and it wasn't because our first lesson was a sex-ed lesson. My attention was drawn back to Zim and I wondered what he was doing. Sneaking a glance, I saw him fidgeting with some sort of green metallic object. What the heck was that? It looked like a cross between a pair of tweezers and a spork.

I sighed and put my head into my hands. Miss Sowourz walked around the classroom handing us out sheets of paper to fill out, each piled with information and questions about the human anatomy. I had to smirk at that, wondering just how Zim would go filling out such a thing. I snuck another glance across to him, and just as I had expected, he was staring at the sheet as though it was some kind of monster about to eat him. He looked up at me to see my reaction at that moment and saw me laughing at him, a deep scowl crossing his features.

'Have fun!' I mouthed silently to him before Sowourz returned to the front of the classroom. He gave me a gesture which somewhat resembled him sticking up his 'middle' finger at me, but as he only had three fingers, it could have been him just waving a finger at me in protest.

He had been here for five years. I wouldn't have been surprised if he'd learned a few rude human gestures in that time.

Smirking, I turned back to my questionnaire and sighed. It was going to be a long morning.


	2. A New Project?

**A/n: **Depending on reviews, I don't know if I will continue this or not. So let me know what you think.

I don't own Invader Zim or any of the characters associated with it, the marvelous Jhonen Vazquez does.

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**Chapter 2**

Dib's P.O.V

Gripping my book bag tight, I turned to leave the classroom. The morning sex-ed lesson had seemed to go on _forever_ and it didn't help that Sowourz had insisted we pair up to work on some of the questions. I hadn't been paired with Zim (thank god, I can only imagine how that would have went) but that didn't stop the obnoxious green alien from demanding answers from other students. Half the morning he had spent twisting around in his chair and slamming his fists onto desks, yelling loud enough for the students on the opposite end of the skool to hear, about how 'hyooman's' were 'lax' and 'stoopid' that they actually needed to learn about this 'stuff.'

I had smirked again at that, asking him if he'd ever learned about sex-ed on Irk, to which he yelled 'I AM FROM EARTH! I AM NORMAL!' in an attempt to bypass the question.

Now I headed towards my locker. Zim's was right across from mine on the opposite side of the corridor, strangely enough. We didn't share homeroom, but we did share the same house team and almost had identical timetables. Opening my locker, I peered briefly behind me at Zim as he opened up his own locker and started to pack away his books. He dropped one at that moment and my gaze followed him down as he bent to pick it up. Unfortunately for me I also got a good view of his behind at that moment as he bent down, that strange hem covering his tight backs-

What the hell?

Shuddering, I quickly turned away. Did I just _think _that? Damn, what was wrong with me? I blamed that stupid sex-ed lesson we had just had. What else could it have been? Angrily slamming my books into my locker, I pulled out a snack before shutting it and making my way to sit outside for recess, disgusted with myself.

I wasn't the most popular kid in hi-skool. Who was I kidding though, I had no friends. Nobody wanted anything to do with me after they'd learned from my old classmates that I had obsessed over Zim being an alien since I was twelve. They'd take one look and me and sneer or insult me. Mostly about the size of my head.

My head _isn't_ big! I don't know why everybody **_still_** thinks that!

Zim wasn't better off. He was usually the main target for Jockstrap and Torque, the two bullies of the grade. Zim had no friends either, and to be honest, I wasn't surprised. Everybody had gotten used to his random outbursts and such, but a lot of the kids I had gone to skool with had grown tired of them. They'd gotten pretty tired of me too, since I still spent half my life observing Zim's every move.

I made my way to my usual spot, right beside a big shady oak tree on the outskirts of the courtyard. Everyday I would sit here and listen to my MP3 or come up with different ways to observe Zim or hack into his computers. That was the one benefit of having no friends; you had a lot of time to think to yourself without the constant distraction of conversation.

I looked up to notice Zim enter the courtyard at that moment. He looked around for a little bit before walking towards where I was situated. Zim usually sat on an undisclosed bench a few metres away from where I sat, by the skool fence. Often dubbed the 'losers' bench, a lot of the students avoided here. The tree I sat at was also dubbed a similar name - 'the losers tree.' As Zim and I were the only two real 'losers' of the hi-skool, this had somewhat become our area.

It was rather ironic in a sense. Both of us were outcasts and considered outsiders by our own kind. My family couldn't care less if I existed. Hell, my own father didn't even remember I was his son. Zim's leaders thought he was a joke, as did his own people. I had learned this after hacking into multiple transmissions on Zim's computer and secretly watching them one night last year. Yet, the two of us were solid enemies. We had a lot in common, but there was one thing we didn't have.

Friendship.

There _were_ times I had often found myself wondering what life would have been like if Zim and I were friends. If Zim wasn't here to conquer my own planet then perhaps we _might_ have been friends, but because of that and that alone, I could never accept him as a companion. The alien was hell-bent on taking over earth, and despite it had been five years since he had arrived here, it didn't mean that he was going to stop anytime soon.

Thinking about this often left me confused. I couldn't deny that Zim was probably the closest thing I had to a 'friend.' I had spoken, chased, tackled and loathed him more than anybody else for the past five years. I was the only person, and I wouldn't be surprised if it was in the entire city, that had been able to identify Zim for what he truly was. Everybody else was just blind. Skin condition my ass. He had no ears or nose and that clearly said something. It was _still _a valid story though, and even after five years it still worked. Zim had managed to fool an entire city because of a stupid black wig and a pair of contacts. It was unbelievable.

Once or twice I had managed to yank his wig off in class, causing those long black stalks on top of his head to stick up. What normal kid with a 'skin condition' had antennae? He'd quickly dismiss my actions and accusations with some kind of nonsense and of course, everybody believed it. There was one time I had even managed to knock out one of those contacts during bludgeon-ball, but he'd been quick to claim he had a case of pink eye. It was like I was never _meant_ to expose him for the alien scum he was. Zim always seemed to have luck on his side. And I envied that. Faith seemed to side with him half the time.

I sighed as I rested my head back against the tree, closing my eyes as one of my favourite songs began to play. A few minutes later I sensed the light of the sun being blocked out and I opened my eyes.

There he was. The center of my thoughts was towering over me. I jerked back a little against the tree and sat up, taking out my ear-phones.

"Zim!" I screeched. "What do you want?"

He smirked at me, and I scowled. He paced for a moment or so, before sitting down beside me, much to my surprise.

"Surprised? Yes, that I can see." He replied in that high-pitched gravelly voice of his. "Dib-smell, I have come to ask you a question."

A question, huh? I sneered.

"What is it this time Zim?"

"Why do hyooman's get so… _sensitive_ about questions regarding hyooman anatomy? Is it too much for your underdeveloped non-smart brains to handle?"

What? He was seriously asking _me_ this? I stared back at him, not expecting such a question at all. Maybe he'd taken that sex-ed lesson more seriously than I had thought.

"Well, uh," I hesitated. "It depends on the questions I guess. If they are in regards to human anatomy then I'd suspect they'd be embarrassing."

"Embarrassing?" Zim asked me, sounding intrigued. I had no idea where this might be going.

"Well, yeah! You're a stupid alien, you wouldn't understand anything about human anatomy!"

"I am a normal hyooman worm-baby and I wish to learn more about, uh, myself, since I don't know."

I nearly choked.

"You! _Normal_?" I laughed. "Oh please. That excuse wore off five years ago."

Zim jumped up at that. "I AM NORMAL!" he screamed, before leaning down towards me and pulling me close to his face by my shirt. At that sudden move, I felt a blush creep onto my face. He was **_WAY _**to close for my liking, but he was stronger than me and I knew that if I resisted, he'd only hurt me in the end.

"Dib-stink, Zim wants want to know more about hyooman anatomy and _**Y****EW**_ are going to tell him about it!"

"No way!" I spat. "That's not for me to tell you, that's for you to find out for yourself!"

"Zim doesn't know where to start!"

"Then that's your problem, you moron!"

Zim growled at me. "You will help me, Dib," he snarled. "You will help Zim."

"And why should I?" I replied.

"Because that Sowourz hyooman has paired me up with you. She said that I disrupt the class too much and that **_YEW_** spend half your life staring at me."

My blush deepened. Thankfully Zim didn't seem to notice.

"So she has given us a poject."

"**_PRO_**ject."

"Yes, yes," He waved his hand at me to shut me up. "A **PRO**ject. If we do not complete this _pro_ject, she will send us to the underground classroom for the rest of the year, and we will have to decorate the school for that halloweenie–time thing." Zim shuddered.

I shuddered as well. Halloween was bad enough as it was and the fact it was approaching didn't help.

"So, we **_have_** to do this? What about the other students, do they have to do it?"

"No, at least, I don't think so. She pulled **_ME_** aside," he clenched his fists. "How dare that filthy hyooman place her slimy hyooman hands over my superior uniform!"

I snorted at his disgust and he glared at me. But I wasn't laughing for long at what he said next.

"I don't like you Dib, but I have no choice but to work with you. So, I will meet you here after skool. I am going to your house with you to start the project."


	3. An Embarassing Talk

**A/n: **Some sexual terms mentioned in this chapter, as well as some suggestive references. Don't like, don't read! This is a ZADR after all!

I don't own Invader Zim. IZ belongs to Jhonen Vazquez.

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**Chapter 3**

Dib's P.O.V

He had kept true to his word.

I was making my way out of the skool to the front entrance when I saw his green skin standing out against the montage of human flesh. Skool had just ended and the buses to take students home had started to pile up out front, while cars sped off around them filled with teens. I had never had to worry about taking the skool bus as my home was in walking distance to the skool. Zim's home was just a few blocks over from mine. I went over to him noticing the other students sniggering, pointing and laughing at him behind his back.

"Zim."

He turned around at my voice, tilting his head at me slightly.

"Dib," he hissed. "Well… shall we?"

"We shall. The sooner we start this stupid project, the better."

He didn't answer me, but his body language suggested he strongly agreed. Gaz appeared behind me at that moment, making me jump slightly. It was an annoying habit of hers, sneaking up on me like that.

"Let's go, Dib," she sneered at me. "I ordered a new GameSlave at the mall and I don't want the store to close before I get there because of you."

"Why don't you just go ahead, Gaz. Zim's coming over for a project."

"Zim?" she questioned, looking towards the alien. Zim stared back at her. "Ugh, I guess I'll just go there myself. Your voices annoy me."

"You're old enough to go by yourself now anyway Gaz. Besides, do you really think dad would notice if I wasn't with you?"

She whipped her head back at me. "Yes, Dib. He _**would**_," she hissed. "So, if he says anything to me, you can take the blame, got it?"

"Whatever Gaz. I'll see you at home."

She scowled at me before turning and leaving in the opposite direction. I was used to her constant threats, so she didn't really bother me. She had yet to break me, but that was never going to happen anyway.

Little did I know wrong I would turn out to be.

Zim and I started the tedious walk back to my house. I say tedious because there was an awkward silence between us the entire time. It was not every day that you were walking home with your worst enemy.

I could tell Zim felt awkward simply from the way he had his head turned in the opposite direction the entire time. Only when I slightly nudged him to indicate we were at my house did he turn back to me, squealing like a child at the contact.

"Yeesh Zim…" I muttered, leading the alien up to the front door of my home. After opening the door, I let him inside. He almost knocked me over, pushing me aside so he could enter and look around. Rubbing the back of my head slightly, I pointed upstairs towards the door to my room.

"Let's go upstairs, then you can tell me what this project is all about."

He looked at me, but nodded in agreement before starting up the staircase. I didn't know if my father was home or not, but I guessed he wasn't. The last time I had actually seen him in person was about a month ago. He had said back then he was going on some trip to some stupid conference, but I really didn't care.

After arriving at the top of the stairs, Zim pushed open the door to my bedroom and stepped inside, looking around again.

"This is your base, Dib-smell?" he asked me curiously.

"I guess you could say that. It's my bedroom. Where I hang out the most."

He seemed interested, and probed at different things around my room. To my surprise he managed to unlock the door to the area where I kept all my private information and files. I ran over to pull the door back, laughing a little in embarrassment.

"Eh, no… that's private Zim."

"Private?" he questioned me. "You hide _**NOTHING**_ from Zim!"

He'd better not try to look in there again. That was where I kept every piece of information about him over the past five years. Thankfully I had remembered to pack it all away and leave none of it out in view. I don't think he had seen the picture of him without his disguise on the wall there.

"Zim, the project." I reminded him.

He sighed in disgust, but sat down on my carpet. I sat down on my bed and watched him, waiting for a response.

"Well, I know it has to be about hyooman anatomy. That's why I asked you today about the hyooman anatomy. You know more about it than I do."

"That's because you're an alien and you have no clu-"

"_**ENOUGH**_ DIB!" he shouted, cutting me off. That surprised me a little. "I just want to get this stoopid project over with, I didn't come here to listen to you and your nonsense."

"You know it's true." I muttered.

He waved his hand at me again. "Now, how do we start this, proooject?" he asked, drawing out the 'pro.'

"Well, we need a topic to work on. Did Miss Sowourz give you any topic ideas or suggestions?"

"All she said was about hyoomans, reproduction and love."

I felt my face turn red. Please be to God he knew about reproduction and love, otherwise I'd be in for a very long afternoon. This apparent project had to have something to do with the sex-ed class. I almost felt like slapping his obnoxious green head for having to shout so much in that class.

I knew that Zim liked his good attendance reputation with the teachers at skool. He had once told me that it made him appear more normal - and 'hyooman' as he had put it - so that the teachers wouldn't get suspicious if he avoided skool over something to do with his mission. I guessed this was the reason why he was so keen to get this project over and done with.

I was snapped out of my thoughts when he kicked at me.

"_**HEY**_**_!_**" I yelled, holding onto my leg. "What was that for?"

"Stop having that stoopid brain–dead face!" he replied. "Zim wants to work on the project!"

I rolled my eyes.

"Okay, so hyoo- I mean humans, reproduction and love. All three? Or just one?"

"Three."

I groaned.

"Zim…you _**do**_ know about human anatomy and reproduction, right…?" I asked him carefully.

I didn't like the stare he was giving me back. I swallowed a little.

"No, Dib-stink. I asked _**YEW**_ about it, remember?"

I slammed my hand to my forehead. _WHY ME?_

Zim was still staring at me. "So Dib, tell me about this, '_reproduction._'"

I sighed. No way out of this now, unfortunately. I would have to explain it to him, otherwise for one, he'd keep nagging me until I buckled, and two, he needed to know so he could do his half of the project.

"Listen Zim. When a male and female fall in love, they will most likely want to start a family at some point in their lives. They have uh… sex… and if the female falls pregnant, she will give birth to a baby boy or girl after nine months."

Zim's eyes widened slightly. "A smeet?"

"A _**what**_ now?"

"Baybee," he brushed his hand at me again. "Smeet. Offspring."

"Smeet?" I asked in wonder. "Is that what you call your young?"

He gave and nod and I smiled. Smeet. That was a very usual name for a child, but I wasn't surprised. Zim was an alien after all. He was still looking at me though with that expression which just spelled out to me he wanted to ask more questions. I gave a sigh, mentally bracing myself for whatever he might ask.

"What is sex?"

I just about choked, before regaining my composure. I held my forehead in embarrassment.

"Sex… is an act of intimacy between two lovers." I told him quickly. "It's usually done for pleasure or for reproduction."

"How?"

Oh God. This was the one thing I didn't want him to ask.

"Uh… I think you'd best look that one up, Zim."

He crawled towards me. "No, you will tell Zim, Dib-smell. Tell Zim, _NOW_."

I felt my face go even redder at his approach. "NO! GOD DAMN IT ZIM!" I shrieked. "I'm not telling you how!"

"TELL ME DIB!" he roared, grabbing me by my hair. I screeched at the pain.

"FINE, FINE! The… the female… has a private area between her legs. The male has an external organ that goes in there."

I was _way _too embarrassed to tell him the names at that moment. Zim was looking at me as if he expected more. He had let go of my hair.

"…And?"

"That's it, Zim. You want to know more then just look it up!"

He scowled at me, before standing up. "Very well. Now, how are we going to start this project?"

"Well, you can go home and look up sex if it interests you so much, and you can get information on that. I'll do the other part about love. Then when you find some information bring it to skool tomorrow and we can work on what we have done in the library during lunch."

I could still feel my face burning. Damn him to hell.

"Fine, Dib," he snarled at me. "Since your weak hyooman brain is having so much trouble answering a simple question."

"It's not that Zim!" I retorted. "Do you even _realise_ what you're asking? It's embarrassing!"

"Of course I realise, you stinking hyooman!"

"I don't think you do…"

_"LIAR!"_

"Whatever!"

I really wasn't in the mood to deal with him anymore. Man, was he annoying! Talking to another about sex and love was bad enough, but I had to explain it all to an _alien!_

I decided to change the subject.

"So, what was the deal with this Halloween thing?"

"There is going to be a halloweenie day," he replied. "Having to work with _you_ is bad enough."

"Tell me about it." I muttered, sneaking a glance at him at that moment. He was looking down at my carpet.

That mop of messy black hair. From a distance it looked normal, but up close it looked almost static. I felt like reaching out to feel it. There was this little voice in the back of my mind instructing me to just reach out for a quick touch. He was still distracted by the carpet. Just a touch. There was no harm in that, right?

Before I knew what I was doing, my hand was slowly reaching towards his head. Soon my fingers brushed that static-looking hair. The texture was smooth, but it did feel like the hair from a wig. Suddenly he jerked his head up, with me still feeling the fake hair. The movement caused my hand to knock his wig off and those black stalks were revealed.

I watched them as they slowly edged up on top of his head until they were rigid. I could tell he was pissed.

"Dib…" he said slowly, reaching for the wig. It had fallen into his lap.

"Oh come on Zim," I replied. "I know what you are, and I've seen you without the disguise before."

He angrily placed the wig back onto his head. "Do not touch me again."

"Fine, I'm sorry."

"…"

He stood up slowly, and turned towards the door.

"Where are you going?" I asked him, jumping up.

"Home."

"Oh. I… I guess I'll see you tomorrow then…" I replied. I didn't mean to sound disappointed, but for some reason I felt it. Like I didn't want him to leave so soon.

"Yes. You will. Goodbye, Dib-stink."

He turned away from me and headed back down the stairs before opening the front door and leaving. I watched his back as he retreated, my eyes darting down to his ass for a moment or so before I almost instantly realised what I had just done and hit myself on the head.

What was _**wrong **_with me? First I was thinking about him and now I was actually looking at-

I sighed. This wasn't like me at all. He was my enemy. Zim was my enemy!

But then my thoughts lingered back to those antennae. The way they had flexed up on top of his head. They looked so smooth and brisk. I almost felt like touching them, just to see what type of texture they had. I wondered if I would ever get that chance.

"Nngh…" I groaned, and went back into my bedroom. I had a strange feeling in my chest. I felt so mixed up and confused inside.

Unable to sort out my emotions, I collapsed onto my bed and before I knew it, I had fallen asleep.


	4. A Strange Feeling

**A/n: **Time for Zim now! Yep, this story will alternate between both Dib's P.O.V and Zim's, so you can get an idea as to how both characters are starting to feel.

IZ belongs to Jhonen Vazquez. Only an epic brain such as his could create the amazingness that is Zim and Dib.

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**Chapter 4**

Zim's P.O.V

"Stoopid hyooman!"

I kicked at a stone, or so the hyoomans had called it, with my foot as I made my way back to the base. I was perturbed yet also intrigued by the Dib-hyooman's odd behaviour towards me today. First he stares at me, and then he tries to touch my hair covery thing as well. What was his **_problem? _** Maybe he thought I was making the whole project thing up.

Truth is, I wasn't. That old hyooman by the name of Sowourz really had approached my superior form and requested this 'project' be completed. I hadn't told the Dib what date she wanted it by yet, but heh, he could figure that out for himself in that huge head of his. I'm sure there was some form of brain within it.

As I approached the base I found GIR sitting on a pile of dirt, a little flag on top bearing the Irken Command logo. Of course, as soon as he saw me, he leaped up and flew at me, knocking me to the ground.

"GIR!" I shouted. "Get off!"

"Mastah!" My mental SIR unit squealed. "You is home! I made pancakes!"

"Pan… cakes?" I asked. What the heck were pancakes? More importantly, would these 'pancakes' kill me?

I brushed myself off and followed GIR inside, scowling a little, before my thoughts lingered back to this 'project' I was required to do. I wasn't going to get any answers about this filthy 'reproduction' or 'sex' out of the Dib, so I figured I would just look it up on the computer after I had some of these 'pancakes.'

My computer had decided to be incredibly lazy on me lately, and I couldn't figure out why. It had been specifically programmed to follow **_my_ **commands, so why? Stoopid technology. No matter, I had planned to look for bugs within it during the next few days. That was, if I had the time. I didn't exactly want to spend the rest of the week over at that filthy hyooman's house. It would be easier for him to come here, but considering the number of times he had tried to infiltrate my base, I was opposed to it. He wanted nothing more than to see me captured and sent to an autopsy table where I'd be cut open and examined. My squeedily-spooch hurt at the very thought of it. I don't recall ever telling Dib I'd love to see him dead on an autopsy table, so why did he constantly tell me that?

He was just a horrible pitiful hyooman, nothing more.

GIR watched me closely as I entered the kitchen and took a seat at the table. He placed a huge plate of these 'pancakes' in front of me, watching me readily. I humoured him and picked one up with my fork, slowly placing it into my mouth and chewing. To my surprise, it was almost as good as the waffles. I ate the pancake, before eating another. I started to feel sick after the sixth, so I stopped. GIR looked upset and the last thing I wanted him doing was wailing at me.

"Sorry GIR, I can't eat anymore." I told him softly, smiling a little. "I'll finish them later, okay?"

"Oki-dokie!" he squealed, before skipping from the room. I watched him as he sat down in front of our television and turned on that horrible scary monkey show he loved.

Ugh. I couldn't stand the sight of that… monkey. I stood up and made my way to the toilet to go down to the base to relax for a while. Possibly look up that stuff while I was at it. After a short trip down, I arrived in the main area of my base, and made myself comfortable in front of the computer.

I reached up and pulled off my head covery before peeling out my contacts and placing them down beside me in their containers. Looking at the computer, I set my arms behind my head and relaxed. As an Irken, I didn't require sleep as my PAK constantly recharged itself, but that didn't mean that I didn't require rest. My body was slightly worn from the day's events, so I just relaxed for a while. After a long thought about rain, I found my thoughts drifting back to the Dib. Five years it had been now since I arrived on earth. And five years I had put up with him and his constant slander.

I knew it was taking me a while to conquer this filthy mudball, but I would do it eventually. If anything, I was still learning about the hyooman's and their strange 'cultures.' I had a long way to go yet before I fully understood the species. But I had a feeling I was going to be very confused after I learned about their mating practices. I was actually hoping the Dib-thing would clear things up for me. I couldn't exactly rely on any other hyooman to. Dib was really the only one that spoke to me, so it would have to be him.

Dib.

Such a simple name for a hyooman. I wondered what his real name was. I could have sworn I heard his parental unit call him 'Dibothen' one time. Oh then there was Dib. I laughed out loud to myself. My name was just Zim. I don't know how exactly I came to be Zim, I guess that was the name encoded into my PAK. I was Zim after all.

Superior. Amazing. Fantastic. Awesome!

Dib was just a stupid hyooman worm-baby. With a big head.

Ugh, why did I keep thinking about the Dib? Was there something wrong with my memory drive? I ran a quick scan on myself, only to find myself in perfect working order. I just shrugged it off and started to do some research on the computer about this 'reproduction' and 'sex.'

Looking back now, I honestly wished I hadn't. What I saw, left me on the verge of throwing up for the rest of the night. These filthy hyoomans where so… ugh… filthy! Not to mention, primitive. On Irk, smeets were produced from the DNA of previous Irkens, so we had no need to have this 'sex.' I had no idea who my doner was. My parental unit was a robot arm back in the smeetery on Irk. It's hard to say you miss something that's just a cold piece of AI. I considered researching 'love' at that moment, but the Dib said he was going to research that section. I just hoped he was doing it, I didn't want to be left with all of the work. Especially if I had to write up about what I had found. I nearly gagged at the idea. Curse that stoopid old hyooman for giving me this project! And out of _all_ people, it had to be with the Dib.

I wasn't complaining though, I'd much rather work with the Dib than any of those other brainless meat-childs. The fact that Dib already knew I was an alien somewhat comforted me. Because it was easier for me to let myself relax around him. I hated wearing that stoopid disguise. The contacts were too scratchy and the covery irritated my antennae. In the past, I had caught Dib staring at my antennae a few times. He seemed intrigued by them for some bizarre reason. I guessed it was because I was the alien. To me, _he _was the alien. I wondered why he had knocked off my covery today. It had pissed me off, but also made me wonder. I had never seen that look on his face before. It had made my squeedily-spooch squirm, which was why I had kept my eyes to the carpet.

Curse Dib and his looks.

The more I thought about it, the worse I started to feel. I just wanted to rest and forget about him for now. I would deal with him at skool tomorrow.

But as much as I tried to sleep, all I could see in my image bank was that hyooman and that particular look. It was burned into the back of my eyes.

My squeedily-spooch started to feel strange again.


	5. An Unusual Situation

**A/N: **First of all, I'm terribly sorry for the slow update on this. I had the chapter written and ready to submit, but I didn't want to rush into things, in the story, so after a long writers block, I've finally sorted it all out and here's the next chapter. To everybody who has read and left reviews for me:

Savetheelephantnow  
HomicidalMiz-Ari777  
Invader Ang  
Stark IDS  
NnySqueeLover  
SwiftyRawr  
Girl U. Dontno  
Captor of the Crazies  
secret-inker

and another anonymous reviewer, thank you all so much for reading and commenting. I hope this makes up for the slow update. I promise I will get this done. :3

Anyway, onto the story!

I don't own Invader Zim or any of the characters associated with it. The marvelous Jhonen Vasquez does.

* * *

**Chapter 5**

Dib's P.O.V

I woke up early the next morning. My alarm wasn't set to go off for another twenty minutes. I tried closing my eyes to get some more shut eye before school, but I was too awake to go back to sleep. Yawning, I kicked back the covers and pulled myself out of bed. Reaching for my glasses beside me, I slipped them on and my blurry vision soon focused.

I let out a sigh.

Today I would have to work on the project with Zim. I wondered if he'd done any of the research I suggested and stifled back a laugh as I could just imagine the reaction he would have had on his face after finding out what 'sex' involved.

"You're up early." came a voice. I turned towards my door to see Gaz standing there. She was already dressed for the day in her usual attire of a black dress and striped purple and black tights. She glared at me and I could see her new GameSlave in her hand.

"Why was Zim here yesterday anyway? I passed him on the way back from the mall. He looked kinda spaced out."

Spaced out? Zim?

"I told you Gaz, we have this stupid project we need to work on together. You really think I wanted him here?"

"I really don't want you here, but I guess I have to… live… with you."

I rolled my eyes. I grabbed my clothes and pushed past her to go into the bathroom.

"Hurry up Dib. I need to go in there."

Ignoring her, I closed and locked the door behind me before stripping off my pyjamas and pulling on my black pants and blue shirt. After quickly using the toilet and brushing my teeth, I left the bathroom and headed downstairs to have some breakfast. A slam behind me indicated that Gaz had gone into the bathroom.

I sat down at the table and poured myself some cereal, noticing a newspaper beside me. I glimpsed at the date at the top of the page. Today was the 29th. In two days time it would be Halloween. I wondered when this project was going to be due. Zim hadn't given me any date and I doubt I'd be able to get one out of him without some kind of confrontation. Quickly finishing my cereal, I grabbed my book bag and left the house. Not that Gaz would care anyway. I was going to be early, but I didn't care too much. I would just sit and listen to my MP3 while I waited for class to start.

I walked as slow as I could down the block to hi-skool. I had decided to take the longer route today. I knew I would pass by Zim's house by doing so, but it would take a bit more time as well. After about ten minutes, I finally passed by that strange green house. I couldn't help but gawk as I passed by, wondering if Zim was in there. I was so distracted by looking at the strange building that I actually ran into Zim himself. He had been hidden behind a tree slightly and stepped out as I had approached.

"Zim!" I let out a cry, jumping back. I couldn't help it.

He turned and glared at me, also shocked from me bumping into him.

"Dib-smell. What are _yoo _doing here?" he interrogated.

"Going to skool, what do you think," I snapped at him. "What are _you _doing out here?"

"None of your business, earth-filth."

I looked towards where he had been. He followed my gaze, before waving a hand in front of me. That made me lurch back a little, before I slapped his hand away.

"Quit it!"

"There you go again with that stoopid brain-deadness! I do not like it!"

"Why the hell would you care anyway?" I asked him. "You know, Gaz said _you _looked spaced out yesterday. Something on your mind as well, Zim?"

"Eh?" he looked a bit startled. "No… of course not!" I laughed. It was probably about the project.

"Did you look up those things then?" I asked him.

He didn't answer me, but nodded in disgust. I grinned.

"I take it you learned what sex is."

"You and your hyooman mating rituals sicken my squeedily-spooch. I vomited last night, all over my superior base floor. I asked GIR to clean it up, and instead he insisted on eating it. That made me vomit again."

I laughed. I could just imagine that in my head.

"Shut your noise tube!" he snapped at me. "Zim's belly hurts."

"Aw, want me to rub it better?" I cooed stupidly at him.

"NO!"

I edged towards him with my arms out stretched to taunt him. "Come on Zim… I know you want me to make it all nice and better!"

_"GET AWAY YOU FILTHY HYOOMAN!" _he screamed, backing away from me.

I laughed again and went even closer. Man, did he spaz out big time. He ended up tripping and falling back against the pavement. That only made me laugh even harder and I leered over him.

"Victory for earth!" I teased him. He didn't answer me and I stopped laughing for a moment or so.

"Hey Zim, you lost!" I said, hoping for a reaction this time, but I didn't receive one. I went over to him.

"Zim?"

After a minute or so, he groaned. I hesitated, contemplating on whether or not to help him up. Eventually my concern got the better of me and I bent down. It wasn't like Zim to not respond to a taunt about losing. "Zim? Are you alright?"

He groaned out again, and I carefully placed my hand behind him to help him up, half expecting him to lash out at me. That was when I noticed a deepish gash on the back of his head, which was bleeding. His blood was a rich green colour, but I had no time to worry about my new discovery. Then I noticed a rock which had blood on it. I put two and two together.

Well, shit.

I helped him up quickly. He was quite dazed. I put my arm around him to support him, trying to ignore the strange feelings in my stomach at the close contact. I had never been this close to Zim before. I helped him up to the front entrance of his house and brought him inside, sitting him down on the couch in there. His mental robot-dog thing raced in from the other room a few moments later and I'd figured he'd heard me enter the house with Zim.

He stared at me for a few moments with those huge cyan eyes before squealing at me.

"BIG HEAD BOY!"

I tried to remember the robot's name. GIR, that was it.

"GIR… right? GIR… uh, Zim's hurt. Badly. Do you know where some bandages are?"

Man this was awkward. I had no idea if the robot had understood me or not. I took it that he did when he ran over to Zim and reached out to touch him.

"Mastah?"

I swallowed a little. I could hear deep concern in that one simple word.

"Mastah, you okay? Mastah?"

Zim didn't respond and I felt my heart sink a little as I noticed tears fill his eyes. "Mastah, I will make you better!"

He ran from the room and I turned back to Zim. He still looked quite dazed. His eyes were half shut. I sat down beside him, steadying him as he seemed to be swaying. He didn't seem to comprehend I was there, let alone that I was touching him, because he would have been fighting me away otherwise. He was really out of it.

"Zim?" I asked, now quite worried. I hadn't intended this to happen. I felt ill inside, but also confused.

Sure we'd hurt each other in the past. I had a scar on my forehead to prove it. But nothing like this had ever happened before and it left me feeling confused. I was the one who wanted this alien dead on an autopsy table, wasn't I? This was ZIM I was worried about. My sworn enemy. So why was I so concerned about a gash on the back of his head? One that was bleeding, at that. Quite badly. Shouldn't I be cheering for joy, or something along those lines? For so many years we'd been ripping at each others throats, wanting to see each other hurt. So why was I here still, with Zim propped up in front of me? Shouldn't I have just left him and gone ahead to skool, without a single care in the world? I sat like this for a few minutes, these thoughts buzzing throughout my mind. I couldn't put my finger on it.

"What am I doing?" I asked myself, shaking my head. I let go of the alien, letting him slump down as I stood up and started to leave. I left the strange house and started up the street, but the more I tried to continue walking, the more I started feeling something deep inside my chest. It was like one of those little nagging feelings you get when you know you have something important to attend to, yet you keep casting it aside. Like leaving an assignment until the day before it is due. You don't want to work on it, but you know you have to. Except this feeling was much worse. It was coming from my heart. I had just stood up and left a wounded being to bleed, possibly die. Zim was a horrible green monster from space, but he still had beating heart (I think) and was a living sentient being.

I sighed, trying to find a logical answer as to why I didn't just cast these thoughts aside and continue on.

There was only one answer for it. I cared about Zim.

As much as I didn't want to admit it, I knew deep down it was true. Why else would I be worried? I couldn't find any other logical reason. Maybe it was just my soft side coming out. I'd gone soft, that was it.

Pushing my thoughts aside for the time being, I turned and rushed back to the house, going back inside. I let out a gasp as I pushed open the strange purple door to find the Irken spawled out on the ground, a small pool of blood beneath his head. It was a good thing I had the right state of mind to come back. I rushed over and pulled him back up onto the couch, holding him steady with one arm while pulling off my backpack and rooting around in the front pouch. I pulled out my packet of tissues I kept in there and opened it, pulling out quite a few and pressing them against the back of Zim's head. It wasn't much, but it was the best I could do. His eyes were shut and he was slack in my hold. I swallowed a little, trying not the panic.

"Zim? Are you okay? How do you feel?" I asked him, hoping for some kind of response. I had no idea how to treat an injured alien. Taking him to a hospital was out of the question, so it was up to me. I knew I could just take him to the hospital but that would mean exposing him. Humans didn't have green blood. But wasn't that what I had wanted most for the past five years. To expose him?

Looking at him again, I found that I just couldn't bring myself to do it. His skin looked pale and sweaty. I reached up and felt his forehead, jerking my hand back in shock to feel that he was cold as ice. Maybe he was injured worse than I realised. Now looking at him in this state… so weak and helpless… I couldn't even begin to imagine dragging him to his demise. Instead I pressed the tissues firmly against the wound, waiting for the robot GIR to come back. By now they were drenched and I had to reach for more. But as I was bending down to my backpack, Zim finally moaned out a little, and I whipped my head back. Was he waking up?

"Zim?" I asked, propping him upright further. After what seemed like forever he finally started to open his eyes. His gaze lingered to mine and he squinted a little, trying to comprehend what he was looking at. I worried for a moment he wouldn't remember who I was but after hearing him ask my name I let out a relieved sigh.

"Dib…"

"Zim… are you alright? I thought… you weren't going to wake up."

His eyes darted back and forth slightly, his gaze still fixed on mine.

"Zim… doesn't feel well."

"Are you going to be sick?" I asked hurriedly and he gave a slight nod.

He held his stomach. I quickly ushered him out the front of the home and over to the grass. It was lucky I did because he keeled over and threw up. I couldn't help but feel guilty. It was my fault he had tripped after all.

I swallowed my pride for a mere moment and drew in a breath.

"I'm sorry."

Zim shakily pulled himself up. His gaze lingered to mine again but he looked distant. I knew it would be best to patch him up fast otherwise he might faint. That was something I didn't want.

I quickly helped him back inside and saw GIR waiting with some strange tools. I had no time to worry what they were though.

"GIR, can you help?"

He nodded. "I'll make mastah better!"

The small android dragged the tools over to Zim. I realised they were containers when he opened them up. Inside was some pretty normal looking bandages and cleaning agents. He set to work gently cleaning Zim's wound and wrapping bandage around it. Then he did something interesting.

He reached for that pod Zim always had on his back and pressed the top pink panel in. It whirred a little before glowing slightly. Zim quivered a little before going still again.

"Mastah should be okay... I hope he will be. I'll make him muffins to make him feel better." GIR smiled, and went into the kitchen. What an odd robot.

It's concern for it's 'mastah' was kind of cute though. Maybe GIR wasn't as insane as I was previously led to believe. I noticed that Zim seemed a bit better. I went around to the front of him and looked into his face.

"Zim, are you alright now?"

"I'll be fine." he replied, and I discreetly let out a sigh of relief. At that he raised a non-existent eyebrow at me. "Why… are you so relieved, filthy hyooman Dib?" He was obviously confused that I was still there, let alone had helped him. I was confused myself.

"I just am, I guess. I…uh… didn't mean to hurt you."

"You've been hurting Zim for the past five years." he replied.

"But… this is different Zim! I didn't go to hurt you intentionally! I was just trying to... ugh, you know! I didn't think you'd trip or land on a rock!"

"I said I will be fine, Dib!" he snapped. "I am ZIM!"

I rolled my eyes.

"Well, if you are going to be fine, then I'd suggest you get your green alien butt off the chair and to the skool before Sowourz sends you to the underground classroom."

"You don't need to remind me, Diiiib." he snapped at me. "You dare speak to me as if I don't already know that?"

I crossed my arms and leaned back against the wall beside me. "You don't know a lot of things, Zim."

"I know more than YEW."

"Oh yes, because you're all the brains. I'm sorry, I totally forgot."

He scowled. "Get out of here Dib."

"And just how do you plan to explain that to the teacher?" I asked him, looking at his head.

"Explain what?"

I pointed to his wig, and he instantly raised a hand and felt it. He pulled it from his head and I stared as those antennae stuck up yet again. I wondered what exactly they were for. Zim felt the dried blood crusted throughout the back of the wig. The hair had clumped together.

"My head covery!" he cried. "What will I do?"

"Head... covery?" I snorted.

"BE QUIET!"

I sniggered. Zim didn't even have to try to be funny. He just was. I perked up a little as he suddenly ran from the room and into that bizarre kitchen of his. I followed him curiously and noticed him at the sink, trying to clean the wig. There was some strange purple goo-like substance coming out of the tap.

"What is that?" I asked him, drawing his attention.

"Hm?" he looked towards me. "None of your business, sapital earth-monkey."

"Ugh." I put my hand to my head.

Zim finished cleaning the wig with the 'goo' before putting it back onto his head. It slumped down and plastered over his forehead and my jaw dropped. I shut it before he looked at me and looked away, feeling my face grow hot. I don't know what exactly it was, or even WHY, but something about the way that damp hair had looked across his forehead had made him look almost… handsome. I shuddered as I thought that. My father had always labelled me as his 'poor insane son.'

Maybe he was right and I just didn't want to admit it. After all, what normal seventeen year old thinks an alien looks attractive? Me apparently.

But when I thought about it, I never did have much of an interest in girls. I knew I wasn't gay, but I had never had a girlfriend, nor did I constantly drool over them like the morons I had for classmates. I was just so hell bent on exposing my childhood dream come true for the past five years that I had no time for the opposite sex. It left me wondering though. I was having these thoughts of Zim all of a sudden. Well, that wasn't exactly true. It had been for a while now, months back actually. I was just too stubborn to admit to myself I was having then because I knew I had better things to worry about than why I was having such thoughts. I was so confused.

Zim was giving me a strange look by now, noticing my uneasiness.

"If it's bothering you so much, Dib-shit, I said I'm fine!"

Dib-shit? That was a new one. Apparently Zim had picked up on rude gestures in his five years being on earth. I brushed it aside though.

"Well, you'd better haul your green alien ass to skool before you get detention for the rest of the year. Oh… and a thanks would be nice. After all, I almost left you there."

"Get out of my home!" he snapped in response, and I just rolled my eyes again and started to leave.

"Stupid arrogant selfish green butt-hurt dumb alien," I muttered as I left. But what I didn't realise was that Zim had heard me, because if only I had turned back, I would have noticed the saddened look on his face as he mouthed a tiny 'thank you' towards me.


	6. A Confrontation Fuelled By Anger

**A/n: **I seem to be on a roll with this. XD Things kinda get a little intense in this chapter. I hope you enjoy it and reviews are appreciated. :]

I do not own Invader Zim. I'm just a dedicated fan.

* * *

**Chapter 6**

Dib's P.O.V

I had just barely managed to make it into the classroom before the lingering feeling of death circulated in the room as the teacher literally floated inside. As I sat down at my desk, I looked over towards where Zim sat. He hadn't followed me as I had left his house, and I wasn't even sure he was going to show up today.

Miss Sowourz started the usual morning lecture, something about the number of deaths and injuries from falling vending machines, but my mind was elsewhere. No matter how hard I tried to avoid it, I knew I couldn't just push aside my thoughts and feelings, especially if they had been bothering me for the past few months.

I had tried asking myself countless times what exactly Zim was or meant to me. Most of the time I had instantly cast the question aside, labeling the alien as nothing more than my ultimate enemy. Zim was a cold green alien, an Irken Invader, as I had previously learned from spying on him so much. He was here to conquer my planet, invade it. He wanted to destroy us, so that his army of planet enslaving aliens could claim our planet as theirs and force us into the worst kind of slavery possible. That alone eliminated any sort of friendship I could ever feel towards him. Zim wasn't the brightest of his race, that I knew and honestly, it wasn't hard to pick up on, but he was very clever and cunning. Much more than I was.

I could still remember that day he had stepped into our classroom for the first time, all those years back. The memory was vivid – a crucial moment in my life. Much like the memory I had of my late mother holding me in her arms one night, that memory was one that stuck out the most. Almost like the warm glow of a fire compared to the grey dreary weather outside. Every thing I had ever wished for before the word alien had become a part of my vocabulary had come true all at once. Aliens _did_ exist. One was standing right in front of me, badly disguised, but _there. _I couldn't help but smile a little at that moment, as I thought back. From that moment on, my life had a meaning to it. Zim had been my only reason to look forward to the hellhole that was known as Skool. Zim had been the only reason I actually looked forward to getting up in the mornings. Nobody had wanted anything to do with me. I had no friends, because I was just known as the weird kid that loved the weird. A freak. They all avoided me.

But for Zim, it was the same. He was bullied worse than I was, mainly for his 'skin condition' and his random outbursts. We were both weird. Both outcasts. Where it had seemed so right that we should have been friends, it had just never happened and I had told myself that it never would. How could I be friends with an alien that wanted to take everything away from me? Take my home and everything I loved away? I just couldn't bear the thought of it, so the possibility of friendship had been eliminated entirely. Even if we did have a lot of common, that was the one barrier that separated us. Zim was dedicated to his 'Tallests' and his mission, while I was dedicated to my people and planet. Despite they treated me like dirt, I still fought and did everything I could to defend them. Although Zim didn't know what his people really thought of him, he still did his best to please them.

We were so similar that it seemed so logical that we should be friends. But each of us had different goals and mindsets and that's what differentiated us.

So why was it this way?

Why was I constantly seeing the alien as something else besides a cold-hearted narcissistic jerk? Just _what_ was it that I wanted? My heart was desiring something, but my head wouldn't have a bar of it. It had been five years since Zim arrived on earth. A lot changes in five years, and I was no exception. But had I changed in that time for the better, or for the worse? Was I possibly starting to _fall _for my enemy? Had I been around him so long that I had developed something other than resentment? There was so much going through my mind that I just wanted to scream and shout and punch something. My little inner battle was interrupted when the shrill ring of the skool bell indicated recess. I sat up and rubbed my head, glancing across to where Zim sat again.

"What's wrong, fag? Missing your boyfriend?"

I turned around to find Torque leering at me, a deep scowl across his features. My eyes narrowed.

"Zim isn't my boyfriend!"

Torque tilted his head a little. "Aww… denial is always the first phrase, Dib," he smirked, his stupid blonde bimbo of a girlfriend clinging to his arm from behind. I hadn't even noticed her.

"HE ISN'T MY DAMN BOYFRIEND, IDIOT!" I yelled.

Suddenly I found myself dragged up by my collar and pinned against the wall behind me.

"Torque! Stop!" the bimbo shrieked.

"What did you call me, faggot?" Torque sneered at me, pressing his face towards mine. I had to hold my breath from the smell.

"An idiot," I repeated, and he socked me in the jaw. Pain exploded throughout my skull, and for a moment my vision went black. He let go of my collar and I slid down the wall to the ground, dazed. I drew in a slow gasp and held my jaw. Apparently Torque didn't handle the truth very well.

"Torque, let's get out of here before the teacher comes back!" the bimbo continued to shriek. By now the classroom was empty as all of the other students had left. Typical nobody was ever around when I was the one in trouble. Torque kicked at me, before he laughed as the two of them left me alone.

Fighting back tears of pain, I shakily stood up and started to leave the classroom. I could feel a warm metallic taste between my teeth.

That bastard.

As I approached the male restroom, I could feel a headache coming on. I pushed open the door and was knocked back by another student coming out.

"GOD DAMN IT!" I yelled, unleashing my anger and pushing the student to the ground. Only when my blinded moment of rage subsided, I realized who I had pushed over.

The Irken looked up at me in shock, his dull amethyst eyes full of confusion.

"Z-Zim…" I barely choked out.

"What happened to yew?" he interrogated, picking himself up and brushing himself off.

"None of your 'effing business." I stated coldly, and turned around, angrily kicking open the door and going into the restroom. I really couldn't care less at the moment, I just felt so angry. Once inside, I kicked at a stall door, slamming it open. I didn't notice that Zim had quietly entered behind me, watching me unleash my rage with a look of shock and and even fear on his face.

"Dib…?"

I stopped for a moment at the sound of that soft voice, and felt a deep pang within my chest. I closed my eyes.

"Just… go away Zim."

He ignored me, coming over to me, and looking at me.

"Dib… your filthy hyooman face is dark."

What?

I looked up at him at that. "What do you mean?" I asked, my jaw throbbing. I went past him and over to the mirror. There was a dark purplish bruise where Torque had punched me. I opened my mouth, and spat out blood into the sink. Thankfully none of my teeth had become loose, but the punch had caused me to bite down hard into my gum, hence the blood.

Zim stood beside me now, looking down into the sink. I could tell he was shook up from seeing my blood and I wondered if he had ever seen human blood before. Zim and I had fought rough in the past, but never enough to cause real injury or harm to each other. Especially to this extent.

"Dib…?" he asked me quietly. I could have sworn I heard concern in his tone. This was new. I looked at him and he stared back at me. There was a long silence between us before Zim finally spoke again.

"What happened? Is it because you are angry with Zim? Zim….eh… " he trailed off.

I felt my heart drop at that again, slightly. Perhaps he thought I was angry because I had wanted a thanks from him and stormed out of his house before. But that wasn't the reason at all. I was angry from the fact that Torque had punched me and called Zim my boyfriend, as well as called me a fag, but if anything I was more angry at myself and my stupid feelings.

Zim continued. "Zim hates to sink as low to say this to a filthy HYOOMAN like you… but... Zim… eh…" he trailed off again.

"What Zim?" I didn't mean to snap, but I did. He slinked back a little at my reaction and I felt a little bad.

"Z-Zim thanks Dib-smell. Thank you hyooman. For helping Zim."

He was thanking me? He actually was _thanking _me? I couldn't believe what I was hearing and I stared back at him.

"But don't think this changes anything, Dib-shit!" he added, and I sneered a little at the insult. "I still hate you and your filthy gargantuan head of smell!"

"And I hate you too, space-boy." I replied, turning back to the mirror. I wished he would just go away.

"I hate you more Dib-worm."

I sighed. Here we go again. These stupid games we played. Over and over. Over and over. It was always the same. We could never truly pinpoint how much we hated each other.

"You suck."

"You're a filthy pig."

"You're annoying as hell."

"You're as dumb as a moose."

"You're dumb enough to be a moose."

"You're dumb enough to call a moose a pig!"

I raised an eyebrow. God he was stupid. The throbbing in my head started to get worse and by now I wanted him gone. He stared at me, waiting for a response.  
I clenched my fist.

"HE DOES NOT ANSWER BACK!" Zim suddenly shrieked. "VICTORY FOR ZIM!"

"SHUT UP!" I yelled, his yelling really not helping my already throbbing headache. I could feel my anger rising again.

"HA! You stinking hyooman! You have lost to the almighty Zi- "

He was cut off abruptly when I slammed him back against the tiled wall, the impact hard enough to knock his wig from his head. He was smaller than me, so he didn't have much of a chance to fight back. Instead he went quiet and stared at me.

"Listen Zim. I am REALLY not in the mood for this bullshit. I want you to leave me alone. I want to _be alone. _Is that too hard for somebody as pathetic and 'stoopid' as you to understand?"

He was quiet.

"You'll never beat me. You're not going to take over this planet. You're too stupid to." I started. I wanted to stop, but the anger and emotion just kept flooding out of me. Everything I had bottled inside of me for the past few months – the abuse, the taunting, the slagging – and I was letting out on the one that had motivated and inspired me to pursue my dreams since I was twelve. In honesty, I had no idea what I was doing or why I was acting this way.

"Don't you realize?" I laughed. "Your 'Tallests' hate you. You're nothing but a joke to them. Even they can see how stupid you are, Zim! You think you're top shit, but you're a joke! You don't have the guts or the intelligence to take over earth! It's been five years and you haven't even blown up one building! You fail as an Invader. You're nothing but a failure, Zim. A stupid, pathetic, defective _idiot_."

I pushed him back into the wall and he was still quiet as he stared back at me. I leered down at him, waiting for a response, but I got none. Instead he closed his eyes and sank down a little.

"Well? Is the almighty Zim going to yell at me?" I taunted.

He still didn't answer me. I was getting tired of his silence. I let him go and he slid down to the ground. I turned my back and started to walk away, my head killing me. But as I pushed open the door, that's when I heard it. It was quiet and very discreet, but I had caught it. I stopped, trying to come to my senses. My head was spinning, filled with all kinds of thoughts, but that one noise had caused everything to come to a halt. I stood there like a zombie as that noise penetrated thought the hard shell of my anger. That one noise alone was enough to snap me out of the trance I had lulled myself into. That noise stopped me from turning my back and walking away. That single little sob uttered from the alien's mouth.

Slowly I turned back around, feeling like my stomach had dropped to the ground beneath me. Zim had his head against the wall, facing the other way. It didn't take a genius to understand why his body gave small subtle shakes. He was crying.

I had made him cry, because of my stupid emotions and anger. I had broken him. This was _my _victory, I had made him weak. I had cracked and exposed the alien's weaker side that was buried deep beneath that egotistical shell, but I didn't feel any sort of happiness or joy from it. I had no desire to scream out and slam my fist into the air in victory. Instead I felt the worse kind of guilt reek into my entire being. It was kind of like the guilt I felt when I couldn't do anything as my mother lay dying in her hospital bed. That painful memory jolted me, and I realized that I had gone too far this time. The fact that Zim was crying opened something up to me that I had failed to see.

Zim wasn't a cold, heartless monster, like I had only led myself to believe for the past five years. If it were otherwise, he wouldn't have been right there in front of me, bright blue streaks glistening as they streamed down his cheeks. For a moment I felt lost. Zim had humiliated and hurt me in the past, but nothing he had done could ever compare to the stupid, selfish stunt I had just pulled. He had just _thanked _me for helping him, a small debt of kindness from him in making me understand that the fact I had helped him only hours earlier did mean something to him, and now here he was, broken on the ground in front of me. He didn't even seem to care that his antennae were exposed as he just lay there, pressed up against the wall, crying.

I was jolted from my thoughts when the restroom door opened and students started to enter. Without thinking, I grabbed the alien under his arms and pushed him into a cubicle, slamming the door shut behind us. I could feel him quivering and he still did nothing to resist me. Maybe he was just too upset to care.

I stood quietly, just holding him upright until I heard the students leave. Finally there was silence again, and I let Zim go. He had seemed to calm down a bit, and stood with his back to me. His antennae were slinked back. Usually they sat at a half raised position, slightly above his head, but now they slinked down his back. Just looking at this I could tell how much I'd hurt him.

"Z-Zim…I-I…" I stuttered. I could hardly speak.

He turned slightly, and I could see his face. His eyes were puffy. I couldn't even begin to describe the look on his face, because this was the first time I had seen it. His gaze met with mine, but I saw nothing in it. It was void.

He didn't say anything to me as he went past me slowly and picked up his wig, setting it back over his head. He didn't set it on right and I could see the bandages around his head, but he just didn't seem to care. I went out after him, reaching out an arm to grab his shoulder, but he pulled away from me.

"Zim… wait, please! I didn't mean any of that I was just- "

I was cut off when the restroom door closed on me.

I was about to go after him, but something caught my eye and I looked down to where he had been sitting. There was a folded piece of paper. After staring for a moment, I reached down to pick it up, unfolding it slowly. It was Zim's messy handwriting, but I couldn't understand what it said as it was written in Irken. However, a few of the words were in English. It appeared to be a list. I read the message in English that was on there, and felt even worse than I did before.

_Thank the Dib-smell today, and ask about hurt. Actions. Does friends. Dib, want? Zim has an idea, is good. Zim thankfully is really. Dib-thing no see._

Even if Zim's handwriting wasn't the best, I could still understand what that message represented. It was what I had wanted for a long time and for the longest time, I had wondered if there was any hope it would ever happen. Half of my anger was based around the fact I didn't think it could ever happen, but seeing Zim today and after all that had just happened I realized that it was true that Zim wanted this as well. Helping him today and not just leaving him must have encouraged him in some way or another. I knew now that Zim had appreciated the fact I hadn't just left him to bleed out. Even If he didn't show it. I knew now that he wanted what I had wanted most, but for years had always cast it aside.

Zim wanted to be friends.

I folded up the note, slipping it into my pocket before pushing open the door and racing from the restroom.

I needed to find him.


	7. A Confession

**A/n:** Wow, I'm literally falling asleep lol, but I'm glad I got this done even if it is almost 3am XD. I'm sorry if there are errors, my eyes are sore and I will fix them up later. Reviews are appreciated. Anyway, Zim's P.O.V once again. I hope you like this chapter.

Btw, I am also submitting this story onto my deviantArt account. Come and visit me if you like :] My username is metros2soul and there is a link on my profile page.

I do not own Invader Zim.

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**Chapter 7**

Zim's P.O.V

Compassionless. Heartless. Emotionless.

Those are some of the words an Irken smeet learns as soon as its PAK become functional. I remember when I first heard these words, I had always wondered what they meant. Other Irken's seemed to understand them right away, but not me. Nope, not Zim.

Whenever I had asked my Tallests about these words they had acted weird towards me. Not in the usual weird way they act because of my superiority but because of something else I could never figure out in my amazing head. Other Irken's called me hurty words and laughed at me. Apparently these words were important to all Irken's and the whole Empire. But I had always wondered why. Quite often I had heard the word the Dib-shit had just called me, mostly mentioned when I was near my Tallests, or high-ranking Irken's, but I had never realized it may have been directed towards me. Defective. That was that stupid word. I had some idea of what it meant. It meant a bad Irken. One that had a PAK that was corrupted. One that was flawed.

I knew it was a bad word and a lot of Irken's hated being called it. Having never fully understood it I only wondered about it, never really taking it into consideration. But now I was starting to understand why I might have been referred to that word back during my training on Devastis.

Irken's were never allowed to show hurty. Or hurt, actually. I think it's called hurt. Ever since we are smeets, we are all raised to learn that being hurt is bad, and that we needed nobody. We were raised to obey our Tallests and respect the Irken Empire. That we must fulfill our purposes of serving and being loyal our leaders and making others bow own to our superior race.

But I knew I was different from other Irken's. Something about me was different. I had something in my conscience that told me the difference between right and wrong, and despite I usually ignored it, it was there. It always nagged me. Another thing I had that was different to me, was that I felt pain. And right now I was in a lot of it. I don't ever recall ever being in this much pain before. In fact I don't ever recall crying. I didn't think I could, but what the Dib-shit had said to me, made my squeedily-spooch hurt badly.

I wasn't stupid. I knew at times things would go wrong for me and make others angry with me. I knew I wasn't perfect like my Tallests. I knew that my plans didn't work as well as I would have liked them too. I knew I had flaws. But, I didn't ever think Dib really thought I was that bad. Usually his words and taunts didn't bother me, but the way he had shouted in my face like that had made me feel worthless. He had told me that my people believed I was a joke. I didn't know if that was true or not (I couldn't imagine it being true) but that wasn't nice. He had told me I was a failure. An idiot. And that had really hurt. I felt so miserable.

Was I really a failure? Perhaps I was. He was right. I had been here for five years and hadn't destroyed anything yet. I was still learning about the planet I had been sent to conquer and developing better plans, but I hadn't taken any real sort of action yet. I wanted to, but I just hadn't. I guess even I myself wondered why. Maybe it was because I had kind of gotten attached to this stinking planet, even if I didn't want to admit it. Earth was a rare beauty compared to Irk. If one ventured to Irk, they would find nothing but industrial areas. Earth was different. It had natural beauty. Grass, oceans, trees… even strange flying pods with wings. Irk had none of that. It was one of the things I enjoyed about being here.

My contacts were blurry and itchy as I made my way out of the skool, avoiding and ignoring all the stupid hyoomans staring at me. Why should they care if I, the almighty Zim, was sad? They had made my life hell since I got here, why should they change now and ask me if I was okay? Because they were all heartless, pitiful monsters. And Dib-shit – Dib-dogpile-filthy-moron-pigfilthy-Dib-shit – was the worst of them all. That hyooman was horrible. In fact he was worse than that Tak bitch that had tried to hurt Zim as well. That was a very long time ago now though and I wondered if Tak was the right name.

I sniffled a little, rubbing at my contacts. I had no reason to remain in this stupid building of stupidness, so I just made my way out of the front entrance and down the stairs to go back to the base. But then I realized something. No doubt the Dib-hyooman would go there after me, probably to make me feel worse and remind me again of how much of a failure I was. No. I wouldn't go back there. I hoped GIR would be all right, but knowing that robot I was sure he would most likely be indulging in a bath of waffles and that disgusting sticky slimy stuff he poured over them.

So, instead of going down the steps, I turned and jumped off the side, heading around to the back of the stupid building. Some students laughed at me and pointed at me as I passed them, but I ignored it all. I really wasn't in the mood for the hyooman's taunts. Suddenly I found myself face first in the ground, one of the stupid little shits sticking his foot out and tripping me. Angrily, I pushed myself back up, only to find myself slammed back into the building behind me. A small group of the hyooman's gathered around me. For a moment, I worried about my head covery. I didn't know if I had set it on right. What if it fell off?

"What's that thing around your head, Zim? A bandage?" the hyooman spoke.

I stared back, turning my head slightly away from him.

"None of your business, filthy dirt-child! Let Zim go!" I spat.

"Was it from your… boyyyfrriieennddd? Naww… did he 'urt yeeewwwww?"

The other hyooman filthys laughed. Boyfriend? What on Irk was that?

"Zim knows nothing of this 'boyfriend' you speak of! Let ME GO." I was getting angry now. They always did this to me. How annoying they were. Curious and annoying little worm-babies.

"He's lying!" the stupid child spat at me. "Come on Zimmy-boy. What did Dibby-wibby do this time?"

Dib? He was referring to the Dib-shit? But I still didn't understand this whole 'boyfriend' thing.

"LET ME GO OR SUFFER THE WRATH OF ZIM!" I roared.

He let my superior form go. THANK IRK. I kicked him in the shin and ran, grinning a little as he shouted after me. Pathetic weak earth creature. They tried to follow me, but I used my PAK legs to scale the building and climb to the roof. Nobody would find me up there. My antennae perked a little under my head covery as I heard them shouting for me. Something about using my head for dog food. Screw them. Stupid hyoomans.

I jumped a little, as the bell suddenly sounded. I had always wondered where it was located. The children all started to head back into the building. I watched them from where I was, perched slightly on my extra limbs. And that's when I noticed him. He came out of the building, running around like a monkey, and I could hear him shouting my name.

"ZIM! Where are you?"

I scoffed slightly, ducking back a bit. Stupid-big-shit-head! Go away!

He looked around for a bit, before he seemed almost… disappointed? Then he went back into the building. Why on Irk would that pitiful monster be disappointed? He had just had me up against the wall and told me how much of a defective idiot I was. What a stupid hyooman.

I went forward slightly and peered over the side of the building. It was vacant down there now. Now was my chance. I jumped from the building, landing on my PAK legs. Letting them lower me to the ground, I retracted them into my PAK and started to walk back to the base. I was thankful that the Dib-shit had gone back into the building. I didn't want him following me or anything annoying like that. Ugh.

But I was caught off guard when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I hadn't been looking back at the skool as I walked forward towards the street. I jerked away and turned around.

I rolled my eyes and let out a highly annoyed groan. Him.

"Zim… please… just hear me out," he said. "I was a-angry… I- "

I scowled. "Leave me alone, Dib-shit."

"Zim, I'm sorry! I really am!"

What was he saying sorry to me for? I couldn't work it out. The sight of his stupid-selfish-big head was making me angry. I wiped at my contacts, which were blurred again. These stupid tears, I wished so much for them to stop.

"I DON'T CARE!" I roared at him, and he backed away slightly at my outburst. Good. "ZIM DOESN'T CARE. NOW GO AWAY YOU PITIFUL MONSTER."

He stared at me before he stuttered again. "Z-Zim I-I"

"I HATE YOU." I screamed. "I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU EVER AGAIN!"

I panted slightly, my squeedily-spooch heaving.

Dib-shit just stared. I think I even shocked him with how loud I had roared.

We just stood like this, for a few moments or so. It felt like hours. Finally he broke the silence.

"I said some nasty stuff before Zim. I know I did. I instantly regretted it when I saw just how much it got to you. I-I didn't think. I didn't even realize what I was doing… please believe me."

Ha ha ha. Pitiful hyooman. Begging for my forgiveness. He looked at me with this strange look. Kind of like that look I had seen GIR give me whenever I told him that his waffle mixture was empty. I went to turn away, but that stupid look was stopping me. I had no idea why, but it had transfixed me. I couldn't take my eyes away from his brown coloured ones.

Dib and I had stared at each other quite often in the past. Usually it was because he was probing at me, trying to see past my disguise or to sheerly make me feel uncomfortable. Whenever I had stared back at him, it was to do the same to him, and also annoy him. But nothing about this look he was giving me indicated the hyooman's hate for me. There was nothing in his cold eyes that made me want to lash out at him, or insult or slag him the way he did me. I saw something else... like a side of this hyooman I had never seen before.

I couldn't figure out what this new expression meant. It was a mixture of confusion and bewilderment, but at the same time, I saw a change in those malicious eyes. It was subtle, but it was there. Some sort of longingness… or desire. I honestly didn't know for sure, but it wasn't the usual Dib look of Dib-shitness.

He looked upset. Maybe he really was sorry. Maybe he was really feeling the same sort of pain I had just before. If not that, some form of pain. It was evident just from that strange new expression he was giving me. It was almost like he had come to some kind of drastic realization, because this side of the Dib I had never seen before. I wondered what it could have been. What could have caused this sudden change. Because I wasn't feeling the cold vibe from the hyooman I usually got at all.

I swallowed a little, unsure of what was going to happen. He stared at me, waiting for an answer, and I felt my squeedily-spooch almost lurch.

"Why…" I started, pausing for a moment or so before continuing. "Why… should I forgive you?"

He closed his eyes.

"Because I know now that you want the same thing I do."

That took me off guard. The words repeated themselves in my head.

'Because I know now that you want the same thing I do.'

What did that mean? I was about to ask, when he reached into his pocket and pulled out a piece of folded paper. I looked at it as he raised his arm and held it out to me. Slowly, I stepped forward and took it, unfolding it to see familiar writing. My writing.

It was my reminder list of things I had planned to do today. I knew Dib wouldn't be able to read Irken, but what he had said before he must have read the last reminder I had reminded myself of on there.

I stared at my scrawl, before looking back to him. His gaze met with mine and we stared again. He tilted his head to the side slightly for a moment or so, as if hesitant, before looking at me again.

"I… want to be friends too, Zim."

So he had understood my reminder. My squeedily spooch lurched again, and before I could speak he continued on.

"I lashed out at you before because I had so much coming out of me at once. So much anger and emotions I have felt over the past few months. It felt like a major burden had been lifted from my shoulders because part of that anger stemmed from something deep inside of me. Something I knew I had always wanted, but always told myself I could never accept it. I would never have thought you felt the same, because of how you are."

He paused for a moment or so, before sighing.

"It only seemed so logical, but at the same time impossible. But I can see now it might not be after all. I realized today that you're not some heartless monster from space. All this time I had lulled myself to believe that you were devoid of any… emotions. I had never imagined that my actions would hurt you so much, let alone expose that new side of you. You were my childhood dream come true, Zim. The only thing that motivated me and gave me something to look forward to everyday, and I repaid you today by calling you something nobody deserves to be called, even an alien like you."

I frowned slightly. I sort of understood what he was saying. It was a bit of a shock to me. This was a whole new side of the Dib. Then again, what he was basically telling me was that he had seen a whole new side of me as well. There was so many things each of us did not know or understand about each other. For five long years we had seen each other as nothing but the enemy. But now I was starting to realize that perhaps we did have more in common than we first thought.

"So… I truly am sorry for what I said before. I don't know how to show you that other than by standing here in front of you and telling you face to face. I don't even know if you will accept it. But I will be honest with you and say that I would rather you for a friend than an enemy. I've… always wanted that... but the only thing that stopped it ever happening was the fact you're here to destroy my world."

I couldn't bring myself to answer him, so I just stared. My enemy wanted my friendship. I knew deep inside I also wanted the same, but I couldn't just turn around and abort my mission. Dib was really the only motivation I had to continue thinking up brilliant new schemes. Because he was the one hyooman that cared enough to listen or stop me and it had been that way since we were younger. There was so much to comprehend. So much… I would give him an answer, however. It only seemed fair.

"Zim, has a lot on his mind, Dib. A lot of lot. My squeedily-spooch feels weird. I need time to think. You hurt Zim, quite a lot. Let Zim think. Think this over… I need to."

I knew I must have sounded stupid, but I really couldn't think straight. I just wanted to go home and rest before my PAK overloaded with all these strange new feelings and emotions I was starting to deal with. The Dib watched me intently.

"I… will see you tomorrow, Dib."

I looked at him before turning and starting to leave. I had no idea how to feel, let alone comprehend what had just happened. I could feel Dib staring at me as I left the area and disappeared from his view. Something was bothering me, and I stopped as I was about to turn the corner. I didn't know why, but I wanted to look at him one last time before I left. I wanted him to know that I had taken into consideration what he had told me and I wasn't going to just brush it aside. So that was why I went back and peered towards where the Dib had been standing.

But he had gone.


	8. A Vital Piece To The Puzzle

**A/n: **Thank you for the positive reviews. I am really glad people are enjoying the story so much. Both on here and on my deviantART account. Thank you to everybody who has read and reviewed this recently. It makes my day to know that people enjoy this story so much. Keep them coming ;) I will work on some art for it over the weekend as well if I get the chance. If you would like to see, visit me on deviantART - the link is in my user profile. :)

To:

**Admiral Peach: **Yes XDD

**Your New Fan: **Thank you Interesting choice of name XD

**FantomoDrako: **Do you really think that? Thank you. It actually motivates me to continue with this because of reviews like yours So thanks a bunch.

**Captor of the Crazies: **Wow, thanks XD. Don't worry, more updates to come.

**ToRRis: **Thank you

**Ale:** It's coming along. Thank you.

And now, back to Dib's P.O.V.

Small fact about the story: the title 'Why Should We Suffer in Silence' is inspired by 'Tripping' by Robbie Williams. In fact, that's where I got the idea for this fic from. XD

I do not own Invader Zim nor any of the characters.

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**Chapter 8**

Dib's P.O.V

The walk home that afternoon was nothing short of tedious. I didn't even hear my sister come up from behind me, and when she reached out and jerked me back by my book bag, I let out a shout.

"Geeze Dib," she smirked at me. "What rattled your cage?"

I heftily pulled away from her, avoiding her gaze. If there was one time I didn't want to deal with her, it was now. I quickened my pace, but she was persistent (as usual) and tagged along beside me. I let out a discreet groan.

"Hey… ya know, there was all this shouting before. It kinda sounded like Zim. What was that about? I figured you'd know, since… ya know, you're always around him."

I cast a glance towards her. "It was nothing."

"So then Zim was shouting to himself, huh?"

"Pfsh. I guess." I replied, lying to her. I just wanted to be alone.

But she didn't leave me alone. Not until we got home, at least. She went off to watch some stupid television show, warning me not to get in her way otherwise she'd destroy my haunted popsicle stick collection. I dropped my book bag down instantly once I reached my sanctuary of freedom, and collapsed onto my bed. My head settled into my pillow and I turned so that I lay facing my closet. The door was still open.

I let out a deep sigh as my eyes came across the picture of Zim without his disguise pinned on the wall there. So much was going through my mind at the moment. I was still having trouble even just comprehending what had just happened before.

Maybe Zim hadn't cried. Maybe I hadn't even woken up this morning and I was still in bed. It was a stupid thing even for me to think, but I pinched myself nonetheless, just to make sure I was really awake. I was. It really had happened. Zim really had cut open his head and I really had called him a defective idiot. I really had made him cry.

Ever since I had met the alien, I had never thought it would be possible that he harnessed some kind of emotional traits. After all, he was a cold-blooded Irken from the dark vast realms of space. I knew aliens were cold. There was just no way that aliens could harness emotional traits. The Zeta Reticuli were the worst – or Alien Greys as they are commonly known here. Everybody's perception of aliens tended to stem only around Greys with huge black eyes. The type that could spark the deepest fear even in the strongest of men. When I was a child, I would lie awake in fear most nights of the Greys entering my bedroom and taking me away. I would be terrified stiff to even get up to use the toilet, or get a drink. In my mind I always thought that if I did get up a Grey would be waiting around the corner and I would see those soulless black eyes glaring down at me. Even to this day that thought gave me the chills.

But at the same time, aliens had always been my biggest interest. Often I would sit out on the roof of our home and gaze into the star filled night sky, wondering if there was anybody or anything out there. It was kind of like an escape for me, especially after all of the bullying I endured throughout my youth. Since nobody wanted to be my friend, I found comfort in being alone and doing what I liked. What kept me happy. I had learned that I didn't need to be popular, nor have friends to keep me happy. They called me weird. They called me a freak. They still did to this day, but really, I just didn't care anymore. I was happy, and that was all that mattered.

But then there was Zim…

He was not like anything I had ever imagined before. I was shocked at just how similar Irkens were to humans. They had a very insect-like resemblance, and despite their pupiless eyes and antennae, they had two arms and legs. Their structure was the same as ours. Hell, they even wore clothes. Zim had boots almost identical to mine. Even pants! And gloves! I sniggered a little, the thought of Zim naked almost passing through my mind for a second. Most Grey's were perceived to be naked. But then I found myself frowning and feeling a little disgusted with myself for even thinking such a thing. I couldn't help it though. Lately I had this odd attraction to the alien. It was like I was seeing him in a different light. And now with all that had happened before, my feelings were only starting to bloom inside of me.

Was there something wrong with me, that now after five years of hating my alien nemesis, I was starting to see him as something else? A possible friend? Maybe even something more? Was I actually starting to develop some kind of feelings towards the Irken? I knew myself just how wrong that was, but at the same time, I wasn't disgusted with myself. Well, that was a lie, I was, but now it felt like the disgust was diminishing. I had seen a vulnerable side of Zim today. There actually was something beneath that outer shell. Maybe the reason Zim had been so hard and cruel towards me was because it was the only way he could hide that side of himself. I didn't know. I probably never would.

But now I knew for sure that Zim wasn't cold and heartless. He bled. He felt pain. Maybe he never was as alien as I had come to believe. All of these years it had been me threatening to take him to an autopsy table. But never once had he threatened me in such a manner. He'd always proclaimed that he would rule the earth and I would one day bow down to him, but he'd never personally said to my face or threatened me that I would be executed. It hit me a little hard as I thought about this. Because I knew it was true. And only now that I had seen a different side of the Irken, I was starting to realize that perhaps all of these years, I had been the real threat all along.

I had wanted nothing more than to see Zim dead, but at what cost? Fame? Was it really worth anything to me in the end after all apart from losing the closest thing I had to a friend? Could I really go through with sacrificing the only thing that had kept me from collapsing and sinking into isolation and depression? I knew that if it weren't for Zim coming to Earth, I would have had nobody. Nothing. No motivation. No hope. No inspiration. Gaz didn't care about me and the only time I spent with my father was when we had our family night at Bloaty's. And that was once a year.

I disagreed with Zim's intentions. I had every right to after all, but when I thought about it, he was only doing what he was supposed to be doing. Like I was true to my people and planet, so was he. I had never thought about trying to see things from his point of view. Perhaps it was time I stopped focusing on myself and started taking into consideration how Zim might feel. He had called me a 'pitiful monster.'

Perhaps he was right.

I let out another sigh and pushed my head into my pillow. Thinking about it all really helped. I found that I coped with stress better when I was isolated. Not that I was stressed exactly, but something that had been eating at me for the past few months was finally starting to wear me down.

For five years Zim had had a significant impact on my life. There was no denying that. But there was also no denying that my feelings towards him over the past two days had increased. Originally I wouldn't have cared less, but after seeing those strange, almost alien blue tears and the look of devastation on his features, I realized I couldn't hold back my emerging feelings forever. Perhaps I had acted too quickly today. But then again I couldn't just leave him without apologizing. I may have hated Zim, but even he didn't deserve what I had yelled right into his face. It wasn't only mean, it was low. Zim had never hurt me in such a way.

I should have stopped myself, but I didn't. I was thankful that Zim had listened to me though, despite I hurt him, pushed him over and also pinned up against the wall and basically told him how stupid and worthless he was… God, now when I look back on it I couldn't blame him for calling me a monster.

I raised my hands to my head and let out a loud groan of frustration. Or was it of sadness? Regret? I didn't know.

Zim. Zim Zim Zim. Did I like him? Did I hate him? Was he my enemy? Was he my friend? Did I find him attractive? Was I starting to find him attractive? Is that why I kept seeing him in a new light?

I already knew the answer in my heart. That had finally become clear after three, maybe even more, whole months of contemplation.

But inside of my head, the puzzle was only just starting to come into place. I had all the pieces, but one final piece was missing. The key that completed the puzzle. And I knew where that key was.

It was with Zim.


	9. An Understanding

**A/n: **Thanks once again for all the reviews. I'm glad people are enjoying it so far and it's not bad enough to hit the back button XD. In case you're wondering, the pattern is Dib, Dib, Zim, Dib, Dib, Zim. I figured that would be a good chapter structure. Mainly the entire story was going to be in Dib's perspective, but I figured it would be good to hear things from characters to help you relate to them more.

To my reviewers:

**SadRebel: **You're randomness never fails to amuse me, even on dA XD ilu. Thank you dear, thank you muchly :3  
**M00-M00: **Don't worry, it's big enough to contain all those thoughts XD  
**FantomoDrako:** No. I write the chapters as I update lol. So I myself have no idea how it's going to turn out as I don't have an actual plot, it just comes as I go along. Thank you once again :] I'm really glad you are enjoying it so far.  
**doompants: **Thank you!  
**Jilian: **Aww, thanks :D And Dibothen is actually Dib's real name. Dibothen and Gazaline. Membrane mentions them at one point.  
**Pandah: **Thank you!  
**Crazy Theatre Chick: **Lololol! Thanks for all the reviews ;3  
**Munelyte: **I'm glad you think so.

Keep the reviews coming :) I've posted some art from the story over on dA, and will post more soon.

* * *

**Chapter 9**

Dib's P.O.V

I can't recall what time it was when I woke up. I must have fallen asleep gazing at that picture of Zim on my closet wall. Groaning a little, I pushed myself up, picking up my glasses from the floor and placing them back on. I must have knocked them of at some point in my sleep. After my vision focused, I looked outside of my window to find it was dark out. I reached across to my alarm clock and turned it so I could see the time.

9.33pm.

That wasn't too bad. Only problem now was, I wouldn't be able to sleep when it was time to actually go to bed. I shifted my legs over the side of the bed and stood up, crossing the room to sit down at my computer. I sighed at the sight of papers spawled out across my desk, and an unfinished mug of hot-chocolate from a few nights back. We hadn't even had a chance to work on the project today. The only time I had seen Zim was when I had knocked him over and confronted him in the courtyard. And then he had left. To be honest, I didn't even think he was going to show up to skool today after what had happened this morning. He had seemed a lot better though. Perhaps Irkens had the ability to heal much faster than humans.

I wondered what Zim might possibly be up to right now. A few months back I had snuck a spy cam into his base. I had also successfully managed to sneak one into the house floor, and it gave me a good view of his couch and television. Switching on the computer, I was alerted when a message flashed across the screen. It was from the Swollen Eyeballs, the secret organization I had been a part of for the past five years. I worked for them voluntarily. The message was from Agent Darkbooty, the only Agent I was in close contact with.

_Agent Mothman,_

_The Eyeballs are growing considerably concerned with your lack of contribution over the past three months. Agent Flyingsaucer has informed me of promised extraterrestrial surveillance footage from you. It has yet to appear in our database. The higher ranks are starting to consider removing you from the system unless you prove your worth. Thought I'd inform you._

_Darkbooty out._

I slammed my head onto the keyboard, closing the message in the process.

Shit.

For the past three months I had been focusing on hi-skool and Zim as well as all of the thoughts that had been bothering me. I can't even remember the last time I had checked in with the network, but I knew it was a long time ago. Ever since I had started having these feelings I guess that the network was becoming less important to me. It had been a long time since Zim had come up with any new plans, and because of that I had no reason to go after him. For the longest time I thought Zim had given up, but one night when he had screamed up to my window about me witnessing his 'latest most greatest most amazing plan ever,' I realized he just wasn't as active as he used to be anymore.

Things had definitely changed. Perhaps it was because both of us had grown older.

Zim didn't seem to have the same burning hatred for earth he had when we were younger. One rare occasion I had found him sitting on a bench at the park gazing at the sun as it set. He wasn't plotting anything, just sitting there and admiring such a memorizing sight. It was a shocking sight. I hadn't thought much of it at first, but it had left me wondering. I had been on my way home from the shops because we needed some bread and milk, and I had passed through Hurt Park as a shortcut, and that's when I had seen him. He hadn't noticed me, but it had made me stop and stare for a few minutes. Like one of those moments you would never ever expect to see. Especially from an alien that wanted to destroy earth.

After that particular night, those feelings had started to come about. I had started seeing a different side of the alien. Back then I still didn't believe that Zim harnessed any sort of feelings, but he obviously appreciated the natural beauty of our planet if he had been sitting and staring captivated at the sunset. Perhaps he had been homesick. Perhaps that was his way of escaping, just like my way of escaping was sitting up on the roof and gazing at the stars. There was just so much I had yet to understand about the alien, even if it had been five years since he had settled here.

I had often wondered after discovering Zim, if any other species of aliens existed. So far, only Irken's had come to earth. I remembered the time Tak had attempted to offer our planet to Zim's leaders by filling it with snacks, but Zim and I had worked together and stopped her. Looking back now, I considered that memory special. Even if we had hated each others guts back then, I had still enjoyed working together with Zim to stop her. Then there was the time I had dragged Zim into that alternate dimension in my head. He had rescued me from that horrible Bitters-like insect monster. He had told me he only did it for my head, but I had always wondered if he came back for me for other reasons. I hadn't even expected him to come back for me at all, because I had sacrificed him and was going to leave him stuck there.

I sighed as I stared at the screen. I thought about turning on the spy cam feeds but every time I had turned them on in the past, Zim had never been in the room, so I had just not bothered with them. The last time I had used them was at least two months ago. Back then I would turn them on every night, but the most I had gotten was GIR on the couch sitting in a bowl of mashed potatoes. Once or twice I had heard Zim's voice, but he'd never come into view. Sighing, I reached out and pressed it on anyway, not having anything better to do.

To my surprise, the first thing I found was Zim in the feed, lying across the couch. I instantly sat upright, adjusting my glasses and peering at the feed. I slammed on the record button. Zim was still in his disguise, but this was the very first time I had seen him in view. He remained like this for a long time, just spawled out across the couch. He wasn't sleeping – I could see his eyes open, although all he seemed to do was stare into space. He shifted a little after a while, and now he was gazing directly into the view of the camera. For a moment, I jumped up a little, thinking he could see the camera, but he hadn't. He sat up a little as if going to come for the camera, but then I realized that GIR had entered the room. The small robot walked over to him and held something up to him. Zim looked at him boredly before taking it. They didn't exchange any words. I realized it was some sort of snack as Zim dipped in a white stick and then put it to his mouth. That left me to wonder what exactly the Irken's diet consisted of.

The Irken sat and just sucked on the white stick for a while. GIR seemed to have gone off somewhere. I started to get a little bored. I was about to turn off the feed when finally Zim put the snack down and sat upright. He reached up to his head and slowly removed the wig. I looked to make sure it was still recording. It was. After putting the wig down, Zim removed his contacts and I couldn't help but gasp a little at the sight of those large magenta eyes. I had always admired Zim's natural eyes. They were stunning. I hadn't seen Zim as his true alien self in a very long time, so it was almost like a breath of fresh air. I stared greedily at the screen.

Zim started to unravel the bandage around his head. He reached off to the side for something and when he drew back I realized he was holding a small hand-held mirror. He inspected the large gash on the back of his head. I couldn't see it from the distance the camera was at, so I wondered if it had healed over. Zim seemed to sigh, and put the mirror down, before I heard movement and GIR entered the view again. He was carrying a small white box. I couldn't help but smile as GIR started to clean Zim's wound and wrap a new bandage around his head. Zim just sat leaning forward the whole time. It was kind of... cute. After GIR had finished, he handed his 'mastah' a rubber pig and left again. Zim watched him, and then looked at the pig. Then he did something that filled me with remorse.  
I remembered back when I was a child, every time I had been bullied, I would come home and run up to my bedroom, holding onto a stuffed alien plush toy my late mother had made for me. Gaz thought it was the stupidest thing she had ever seen, and called me a baby. I hadn't cared what she thought. That little toy was the only reminder I had left of my mother. She used to tell me to always believe in myself, and that I could be who I wanted to be if I put my mind to it. It never ever mattered what anybody else thought. I felt so much comfort from that little plush toy. Even as a seventeen year old to this day, that toy remained in my bed. I found comfort from it and it had been that way since my mother had died. It was my way of reminding myself that she was up there watching over me. If that little alien doll wasn't beside me in the bed at night time, I found it hard to sleep. It was pathetic really, but it was the only thing I had left of my mother and I loved it dearly.

Since I had no friends, nobody was there to tease me about it. Gaz had long forgotten about it and never bothered me about it. I could imagine how much she would tease me if she did see it in my bed, so I always kept it hidden deep beneath the blankets.

As I looked at the live feed, it was like looking at myself back when I was younger, holding onto my little alien doll and trying to forget about the outside world. Instead it was an alien, holding onto a stuffed pig and lying down with it. He wasn't crying, but just from watching him I could tell he was very down. GIR came back into view shortly after, carrying a blanket which he set down over Zim.

"Don't be sad mastah. I still loveded yewww!"

Zim didn't respond, but I heard him sigh. He reached out and touched GIR on the head as a small gesture of thanks before the robot left him again.

"Maybe Zim is a failure."

My heart sunk after hearing that soft voice. I would give anything to go back in time and prevent that moment from ever happening. But all I could do was sit here and watch in guilt. I had apologized to Zim before, but deep down I knew it would probably be a while before Zim would get over it. You couldn't rush an injury. It needed time to heal. Just like my jaw would heal over in about a week or so, the emotional damage I had caused the Irken would need time to heal over. I felt a little sick seeing Zim this way. Obviously there was some kind of heart in that squeedily-spooch of his if he was very clearly still upset.

My anger had gotten the better of me today, but still... he didn't deserve any of what I had said. I knew Zim wasn't a failure at all. If anything, he was a genius. Some of the plans and inventions he had come up with over the years had left me stunned. He was a mastermind at technology. He was advanced way beyond my generation. His race was obviously hundreds of years ahead of ours in technological advancement.

If anything, I found that I envied the alien more than hated him.

I wondered if it was possible that Zim might have been depressed, or was able to feel depression. I know I had suffered with it significantly last year. I had managed to get myself away from it, but it wasn't the best time of my life. Having a family that ignored you didn't help at all.

I knew that Zim was bullied a lot. Both of us were. I could imagine that would have some impact on his emotional state. It was just impossible to not feel any sort of anger or sadness or resentment after being slagged, mocked and jeered almost every day. I put my hand to my head as I watched him lay there, nuzzling into the pig. He remained like this for quite a while. Eventually I put my head into my hands and lay down, Zim still in my vision on the screen. I wasn't sure how much time had passed, but I must have dozed off because when I woke up again, Zim was gone, and the pig was on the floor. I rubbed at my eyes and checked the time.

12.54am.

"Ughh..."

I groaned as I pulled myself up, my head throbbing a little from being in such an uncomfortable position. My arms had pins and needles. The recording had stopped but I wasn't going to send that footage to the Swollen Eyeballs. I had recorded it mainly for my own sake.

I felt like a sick stalker, having those cameras in Zim's home and invading his privacy, but the Irken was like a drug to me. I needed to see him. I needed to hear him. To think about him. I needed him in my life. He was the only thing that kept me sane. From losing my mind. He gave me strength.

The past three months I had spent trying to find myself. Who exactly I was and what I wanted. What exactly Zim was to me. I went into the archives on my computer and replayed the recording, skipping to the part where Zim lay nuzzling the pig. I hit the space bar to pause it and just sat there staring at his form.

There was obviously something wrong with me to obsess this much over the alien, but seeing him this way really killed me inside. Especially since I knew it was my fault. The feelings inside of me were overwhelming. I felt like a popcorn kernel ready to burst, but could never reach that final stage. Like those dreams you have where you want to fly, but no matter how you try, your feet never seem to leave the ground.

I wanted the Irken in my arms. To hold him and tell him that everything would be alright. I wanted to be there for him. His friendship was the only thing I had truly ever wanted. I was sick of being his enemy. I was sick of our petty games of hate. I knew somewhere deep inside of him he wanted the same thing as me. The only real barrier that was holding us back was our pride and dedication to our people. Our very different beliefs. But was it really so hard to just swallow our differences and admit how we truly felt?

I knew now that I was ready to. I couldn't stay like this anymore because it was wearing me out. It had been this way for three months and if it went on any longer, I felt I was going to go insane.

I needed to tell him the truth. And I needed to hear it from him.

Because no matter how much I had tried to deny myself of it in the past, I knew that Zim meant the world to me.

He always had.


	10. A Telling

**A/n:**

To my reviewers: **  
AdmiralPeach: **You have no idea how hard it was to not stop laughing after I read this.  
**M00-M00: **Awww :3  
**Randomperson: **Thank you. I'm glad you are enjoying it. I'm sorry about your mother. I'm glad this chapter was something you could relate to. I almost lost my own mother last year from an aneurism, but she pulled through. I can't imagine what that must have been like for you I hope you are coping ok now.  
**DrDeathDefying: **Don't do that! XD Then you won't see the rest!  
**ToRRiS: **Aww, thanks. That means a lot.  
**Ale: **You do? I find this pattern easy to work with :3  
**Silvermewtwo: **Thank you! I'm not too sure now actually. I could have sworn I heard those names at some point in the series, but maybe it was just me. It's not actually confirmed though, but I think they would be best fitting for the characters. Like I've seen somebody call Zim Zimothy before. Anyway, those are the names I'm giving them in this story.  
**Crazy Theatre Chick: **Lol XD  
**YaoiGirly: **Here's your update!  
**FantomoDrako: **I'm glad you have such a keen intrest in this. :) I'm sorry to keep you waiting for this update. I might try get around drawing that sometime so you can see how I visualize it, with Dib staring from his bedroom :3 It is creepy, yes XDD But he can't help it. Zim's like his drug XD. Thanks again and I hope you like this chapter!  
**Girgirl555: **Wow, thanks :D  
**Captor of the Crazies: **lol XD  
**Ale: **Sorry D: Bad writers block!  
**Savetheelephantnow: **Aww, thank you :3 And it's fine :)

Thanks again to all who reviewed. I thought that Zim sleeping with the pig might have been too soft, but I wanted to show that the alien does have a heart. It's vital to the story.

I'm sorry for the slow update on this. I had writers block. Ugh. I hope this chapter makes up for it.

Back to Zim now.

* * *

**Chapter 10**

Zim's P.O.V

Irken's are not supposed to show any sort of emotion or pain. If we do, we are instantly considered as defective. Dib had been right after all, in saying that I was defective. It must be true because I still felt so miserable. I shouldn't be feeling this miserable. I don't know why I was. Usually when Dib had insulted me in the past, I would brush it off. But for some reason this had stuck with me. Eating away at my squeedily-spooch. I couldn't get rid of it.

I sat up in my sleeping quarters, disconnecting my PAK from its various chargers. Everytime I shut down for the night cycle, I would have to revitalize my PAK, restoring its nutrients and oxygen supply for the next day. My atmospheric processor enabled me to breathe Earth's air, as well as allowed me to speak the same language as the hyoomans, however I needed to filter the oxygen supply my PAK provided me with every night. It's an annoying process, but without it my body shell would perish.

I reached up and felt my head. It was still sore. Usually Irken's heal fast, however serious injuries take a few days at most. The rock had cut into me pretty deep. My antennae perked slightly as my vision came across the papers still spawled across my work station from two days ago. I knew this stupid project was going to be due very soon. Tomorrow. I would somehow have to find a way to work on it with the Dib, despite what had happened between us. I didn't exactly want to spend the rest of the year in the underground classroom and I'm sure he didn't either. Nor did I want the hyoomans questioning me if I failed.

Groaning a little, I pushed myself out of my bed and trudged over to the desk, picking up the papers and shoving them into the storage compartment in my PAK. I didn't need a regular skool bag like most of the other stink-childs. Over the years however, I had been constantly questioned about my PAK and why I always wore it. Even in gym classes. They found it odd that I couldn't swim, let alone take off my PAK. The fact I couldn't go anywhere near the water didn't help. They would tease me and throw water at me. I had a near miss one time where I almost fell into the gym pool after some foolish human pushed me aside, but at the last second I had caught myself with a PAK leg. I hadn't bathed in paste that day. I didn't know how I was supposed to explain to the teachers that my PAK was my life support and was connected to my spine. I was afraid if I did, they would try to remove it from my body. After ten minutes without it, I would die.

The fact I couldn't do as many things as the humans didn't help my reputation. I was bullied quite a lot. I hated it. I hated them all, they were horrible. Stupid stink-beasts. I was bullied for the colour of my skin, which was considered normal where I came from. I was bullied for my antics and outbursts. Sometimes I was even bullied because of the uniform I wore. Not only Dib, but a few other humans had asked me why I had no nose, or ears. I had them, the humans just didn't know it. My nose is in the centre of my face, but is invisible. We Irken's don't need an outward appendage like the humans. My ears were my antennae. I picked up a variety of things through them, such as taste, some smells and even faint radio waves. Irken senses are far better than humans. From observing them I had concluded that their eyesight was weak, as was their sense of smell and hearing. They could not see in the dark. They had faulty vision, like Dib, who wore those ocular enhancers almost every day. When I had removed them from his face in the past, he was like a blinded monkey, frantically crashing into things while trying to get them back. I snorted at the memory.

Wearing a wig over my antennae somewhat restricted my ability to hear or sense things correctly. Perhaps this was why I yelled so much when I spoke. But I had no choice. Once or twice I had let them up from under my head covery, but would have to instantly hide them again because the Dib would come into the classroom, or come out of nowhere. It was such a relief to not have to hide down here in the base. I hated wearing the contacts as they irritated and hurt my eyes, but again I had no choice. My eyes were large and very different from the humans. I had claimed I had a case of what the humans called 'pink eye' once in the past when Dib had knocked one of my contacts out during a sadistic sport called 'bludgeon ball,' and they had fallen for it. I had been lucky there, but there were some smart humans in the skool that would know I was lying. If not for my antennae, my eyes were a dead giveaway that I was not a part of their stupid race.

Casting aside my thoughts, I went to tidy myself up in the bathroom of my base. We actually called it a cleansing station, but I had become more accustomed to the term bathroom. I disconnected my PAK, which hovered beside me while I stripped out of my night clothes, before it reconnected itself as I stepped into the shower. After drying down by the heat blaster, I lathered myself up in a protective layer of paste, before pulling on my uniform for the day. I stepped out of the bathroom and back out into the base, before going over to a mirror in my sleeping quarters and examining how I looked. I was busy inspecting my teeth when I felt a slight nudge to my head. I turned to find Minimoose hovering beside me with a fork in its mouth. It squeaked at me.

"Yes, yes, I'll be up soon." I told it.

It squeaked at me again, before doing a roll in midair and floating away. I watched it for a moment or so pondering on how exactly I managed to create that thing, before turning back to the mirror. I picked up my head covery from the shelf beside me and fit it over my antennae before groaning a little at the thought of putting my contacts in. It had to be done no matter how much I hated it. I picked my contact containers up, opening them and pulling out my contacts. Before I put them over my eyes, I put a few drops of clear liquid over them. A few months ago I had discovered what the humans called 'eye drops' after watching television one night. I had learned that they were used to soothe irritable eyes. After obtaining them, and using them on my contacts, I had found that it was much easier to wear them and my eyes weren't as sore. I fit in each contact before heading up to the house floor. The smell of waffles and bacon reached my senses, but instead of feeling hungry I felt my squeedily-spooch lurch.

GIR and Minimoose stared at me as I stepped out of the toilet for a moment or so, before a huge smile broke out over GIR's face and the moose just did two rolls in the air.

"MASTAH! Hiiiiii!" my SIR unit squealed. "Did joo sleep wif deh piggys?"

I nodded, holding my head after feeling a throb. I assumed he meant last night.

"Daww, mastah, is you okay?"

"I'm fine GIR. Just a headache."

He nodded, and offered a plate of freshy cooked waffles to me. "Would you like some BANANAS?"

"Waffles, GIR."

"WAFFLES!"

I shook my head. "Not this morning. Zim isn't feeling too well. Maybe later."

His antenna drooped. "Aw, okay. I put them in deh ovan for yew for laytah!"

I went to tell him not to, but just let it go, not particularly in the mood. Instead I turned and headed for the door to make my way to skool. GIR ran up from behind me and clamped onto my leg as I walked.

"GET OFF ME GIR!" I yelled.

"Have a good day at dah skool! And don't you no let Dib-shit hurt joo!"

I smiled a little. "Thank you GIR. I'll be home later."

I petted my robot on the head a little, and he jumped off, pulling out a tube of acne-blast and sucking on it as he went back into the kitchen. I just shook my head a little and began walking to hi-skool slowly, feeling a looming feeling in the pit of my stomach.

I really didn't want to go in today. I wouldn't have gone, but I had to because of the project. That was really the only reason. I was somewhat anxious of what the Dib was going to say to me today. I knew I wouldn't be able to ignore him. But then again, why was I so worried? I had known him for five years now. If anything, I should be used to seeing him. I guess I was anxious with this stupid anxiousy feeling because he had made me cry yesterday. He saw a weaker side to me. A side I had never hoped to show him. I had spent years hiding it away from him, distracting him with my mission and my superiority, but I felt like that had all gone to waste now.

I trudged along the sidewalk, ignoring the humans that stared at me as they passed. The strange creatures made all sorts of noises. Some of them sounded like pigs. I hated their stares, but all I could do was ignore them. As I passed by a bus stop, a small group of human females were there. About five I was guessing. One of them spotted me, and giggled, before whispering to the other females.

"Ew, look at his skin! It's so green!"

My antennae perked a little, before I frowned. I pressed my way on, trying to ignore them.

"What kind of guy wears pink? He must be gay. Like totally."

I stopped. Gay?

"His hair is soooo past it's used by date. What a loser."

I growled a little, and quickened my pace, getting out of that area as fast as I could. Why couldn't the humans just leave me alone? I knew I was different. I was an alien, a different species to them, of course I was different and of course they were going to stare at me, but this was getting old! The pitiful creatures mocked and jeered me for everything! From my boots to my hair, even my teeth!  
I wanted to cry out in frustration, but instead gritted my teeth and just held my pride as I pushed through more of the idiotic creatures to get to skool.

Irkens were taught to maintain their pride no matter what.

After what seemed like hours, I finally saw the skool looming ahead. I didn't see anybody about and assumed I was late. I started to run towards the building, pushing a few more humans out of the way. When I finally reached homeroom, I realized I was early. I hit myself on the head in frustration, taking my place at my desk. A few moments later, the teacher walked into the classroom, spotting me at the desk, before sitting down at his. I doodled with my finger on my desk, when I sensed a shadow over me. I looked up and had to jerk back a little in surprise at how close the teacher was to me. He tilted his head slightly, before shutting the door to the classroom and pulling out a chair and sitting down in front of me.

I felt my squeedily-spooch lurch again. What was going on? Was I in trouble?

"Zim... isn't it?" he asked me, looking to a piece of paper in his hands.

"Yes, I am Zim." I replied.

He nodded. "Good to see you always here on time. While I have you alone, I just wanted to ask you how you are finding hi-skool."

How I was finding it? I stared at him. "Well, Zim just walks from his home until he spots the building, then he-"

I was cut off abruptly when he raised a hand to stop me talking and laughed. "No no... I mean, how are you finding it here. At this skool. Are you happy?"

Oh.

"Not really. I would rather be elsewhere than surrounded by gullible stink creatures." I started to doodle with my finger on the surface of the desk.

"Stink creatures?" he asked me, and he shook his head a little. "Well... Zim, I've noticed you don't interact very much with the other students. You keep to yourself a lot. Is something bothering you?"

Well, obviously I wasn't going to interact with other students. They treated me like dirt. I hated them!

"No."

He drew his chair closer to my desk and lowered his head so that it was level with my line of vision.

"Zim, if you are being bullied, you do not have to be afraid to tell me. I can help you."

"Zim is always bullied." I replied. "You hyoomans are selfish pitiful monsters. Zim would much rather be alone."

He was quiet for a moment or so before he asked me THAT question. The same one I'd heard over and over from the other stupid inquisitive humans. I had no idea what it even meant.

"Why do you talk that way, Zim? You always refer to yourself in third-person."

"Eh?"

He just sighed. "You are a troubled child, Zim. Would you like me to book you in to see the counsellor?"

"I am fine! I do not need to see this 'council-ellor' Zim is fine! Just leave me alone! I'm NORMAL."

He looked at something on the desk, before back at me. "Zim, you only have three fingers. On each hand."

I felt my squeedily-spooch lurch. "It's... a part of my skin condition!" I grinned. WHY WAS HE QUESTIONING ME?

He nodded. "Mmm. I don't see any ears on you either. Or a nose. Are they also a part of your skin condition?"

Curse this questioning, probing human! I put on my 'make the humans feel sorry for me' act.

"Yes..." I lowered my head, trying to sound miserable.

"I see..."

Thank Irk the bell rang at that moment. The door opened and students started to enter the room.

"I'm going to keep an eye on you Zim." The teacher told me. "I'm worried about you."

Oh great. I slammed my head into the desk. Now I had this stupid human to worry about. As if I wasn't bothered enough by them already. I regretted doing that when my head throbbed again.

For the entire of homeroom period, the stupid teacher wouldn't stop looking in my direction. I tried to adjust my position so that other students blocked my way, but even so I still saw him looking. It was very annoying. After what seemed like hours the bell finally rang, and I bolted out of there. I would rather be stuck in gym class than in there. It just so happened that my first class of the day was PE. I grabbed my sporting gear from my locker and made my way to the gym. This was the only class I didn't have with the Dib, so I wouldn't have to worry about him and his stupid weird attitude. As I walked into the gym, I looked around for my teacher and spotted him over with the other students of my class near the pool area. Great. Another torture session for Zim.

Some of the students looked at me as I approached. I arrived just in time to have my suspicions confirmed.

"..To better prepare yourselves for your wretched adult lives that await you! Now, get changed and into the water! Teams will be determined by how tall and how small you are!"

I swallowed. The students around me headed into the change rooms, but I remained where I was. The teacher approached me. "Get going Zim! You're going in too!"

"I uh... I'm not feeling very well today. Can I sit this one out?"

"That excuse is getting old! You haven't gone near the water since you joined this class!"

"Because Zim is allergic to it?"

"You'll live! Get going!"

"But, my head! I hurt myself." I pointed to my bandage.

"Keep your head out of the water then! You'll be in the shallow end anyway Zim. Waist high."

"But I-"

"GO! Otherwise I'll recommend the underground classroom for you for the rest of the year!"

I felt sweat form on my forehead. I turned around slowly and made my way to the change rooms, pushing past the human males and entering a stall. I kicked off my boots and pulled off my gloves before I removed my uniform after disconnecting my PAK. It connected to my spine again as I pulled on my gym shorts. The gym shorts doubled as what the humans called 'toggs' or 'swimmers.' I had no idea what either of those terms meant, but I knew it was associated with the pool and these shorts were wearable in the water. I swallowed a little as I realised this was the very first time I would be exposed to the humans. I had an idea of what the humans looked like under their shirts, but I was very obviously different. I didn't have those strange features they had on their chests and stomachs.

I just hoped the skin condition excuse would still work. I bathed in paste everyday as it protected me from earth water, but today I was especially glad I had done so. I put my uniform away into my PAK, before sealing it shut and drawing in a breath as I exited the stall. Of course, I was the last one out and the change room was empty. I swallowed a little, and made my way out to the pool area. Just as I expected, everybody stopped and stared at me as I approached.

"Whoa... check it out!" I heard The Letter M drone. I groaned.

"He's so... green!"

They all continued to stare at me as I joined the group. Some of them even turned their backs to the teacher and walked around me.

"He has no belly button!"

"ENOUGH!" the teacher suddenly boomed. "YES, WE ALL KNOW HE'S WEIRD! NOW PAY ATTENTION!"

I sighed, but thankfully the students turned back around and seemed to forget about me after a few moments. The game we were going to play was called 'pool bludgeon.' That really didn't sound good. After the teacher finished talking, we were assigned into teams. I was in the smaller team, as I was obviously the shortest student there. I hated being so small.

The other students started to get into the pool. I was shaking by now.

"Hurry up Zim! We don't have all day!" one of the students called to me.

I held my breath and dipped a foot in, expecting to feel burning pain from the amount of water, but thankfully felt nothing. I slowly got into the water, letting it rise up to my waist. No burning so far. I wondered how long the paste would last as I wadded up to my team. They stared at me again.

"STOP LOOKING AT ZIM!" I shrieked.

Some of them laughed, but they turned away and started discussing tactics for the game we were about to play.

"Zim can go first!"

"Wha...?" I barely had time to ask as a ball was shoved into my hands and I heard a whistle blow. Before I knew what was happening, balls came flying out of nowhere towards me. One of them hit me in the head and I cried out, dropping the ball I was holding. I shrieked a little as I tried to make my way behind the other students, holding onto my head covery.

"ZIM! What are you doing?" Zita called to me, as she threw a ball towards me. "You're supposed to help!"

"No that's okay!" I called back, before I was hit with another ball. I felt my contact dislodge and fall into the water, and instantly closed my eye. The other students stopped what they were doing and stared at the contact as it floated on the surface, before looking at me. I quickly leaned over and picked it up.

"Uh..."

Turning my back to them, I put it back in but shrieked as I felt it burn my eye, forcing me to take it out. "OW OW OW OW!"

"You okay Zim? What's up with your eye?"

"I'm fine! I AM NORMAL!" I grinned, before I was hit with another ball. "STOP DOING THAT!" I roared, realising the other team members were doing it to me on purpose as the game had stopped. I felt my head covery shift and a cold sensation as one of my antennae poked into the air.

"Whoa! What's that on his head?"

Damn it! Curse these stupid creatures! I had to get out of there! I quickly turned and wadded back to the side of the pool, trying to climb out but I felt another student grab my arm and pull me back in.

"Where are you going? The game isn't over yet!"

"Yeah Zim, what's wrong with you! You can't just leave!"

NO! I had to get out of there before I was exposed! I jerked away from them, finally getting out of their grasp and making a beeline for the edge of the pool. The tried to stop me, but I growled.

"I'm going to... THROW UP! YES! NOW LET ME OUT!"

At that they backed away, and I was able to get out. I ran as fast as I could back to the change rooms, feeling the underside of my other contact starting to burn. I had no idea why it was starting to burn, but it was painful. I guessed there was something in the water that was causing it. Looking around briefly, I pulled off my head covery and took out my contact, before reaching into my PAK and pulling out the eye drops, squirting a few drops into each eye. I squeezed them shut for a moment or so trying to relieve the pain, when I heard movement behind me.

I froze, as I heard footsteps approach me from behind, before I felt a warm hand tap me on the shoulder. Opening my eyes, I turned around, but realised only too late that I was exposed. I was about to scream out about pink eye when I realized who had tapped me on the shoulder.

Dib.

I stared at him. He stared back at me, obviously shocked from seeing my true nature for a change.

"Zim?" he asked a moment or so later. "What's going on?"

"None of your business, earth-filth!" I snapped, before sighing.

He frowned. "Zim, why are you wet? Are you okay? I know you burn in water." He replied, casting aside my insult.

I knew deep down how half-hearted I had sounded. I really felt no reason to snap at him or insult him. I'd just been doing it for so long it felt natural.

He sounded concerned...? Worried? I wondered why this was. Dib had been acting very differently after he had seen me crying.

"PE," I replied. "I had to get in and play because of the stupid teacher. They said Zim's excuse was old. Or something."

"Why are you out of your disguise?" he asked me.

"The water was burning my contacts." I replied.

He looked behind him, before taking me by the hand and leading me into a stall, shutting the door behind us. I was taken aback, but swallowed a little.

"I'd rather not be out there with you like that if somebody comes in." he explained softly, and I gave a slight nod.

"That's... different." I replied. "Any other day you'd be trying to expose me."

He shook his head, before sighing. "I know... but... I don't really feel like it anymore."

I tilted my head and my antennae perked up. It caught his attention and he looked up to them for a few seconds before looking at me.

"I've been feeling really bad Zim. About yesterday. I didn't mean to make you cry."

I stared at him. I had no idea how to respond to that, so I just let him continue.

"For five years we've hated each other. I hated you because I always assumed you were just a horrible green monster with no feelings or remorse. You were always so hell bent on taking over earth and mocking me. I had no idea that perhaps maybe, I was hurting you too."

"How?" I asked. He had my full attention now.

"By telling you that I was going to relish in the day you were autopsied on. After I saw you hurt yesterday... and all the bullying I know you get... it just made me think. I really don't want to lose you to fame because I wouldn't gain anything from it. It's been a long time since you got here and we've been through so much, but after five years something has changed. I don't think I could get used to coming to skool and you never seeing you there again. Or going to your house and finding the media and police lines barricading it while the FBI are inside searching your home and disassembling your base. Or the thought of you... on a table about to be..." he looked away.

"Killed?" I asked.

He looked at me, and nodded. "I was so blinded by how much of a monster you were that I just never stopped to think what it would be like to be told everyday that you were going to be killed and have all your organs pulled out while you're alive."

I looked down the ground, frowning slightly, before looking back to him again.

"Of course it is hurtful. Zim did his best to ignore it. Irken's are raised to be strong. To not show fear or hurty... I mean hurt. But you were right about one thing. I am defective. I feel pain. I shouldn't but I do. You caused me it yesterday. A lot of it, and I cried."

Dib didn't answer me but I could tell he felt bad just by the expression on his face.

"It will always hurt me. It still is, but at least you are telling me how you feel. It makes me start to think maybe for a hyooman, you are not as bad as I thought."

"And it's the same for you Zim."

We stared at each other again. I felt my heart racing in my squeedily-spooch. It only did that when I was feeling something strange, and I was now.

"I've always wanted nothing more than your friendship, Zim." Dib continued. "But lately I just... feel something else. I have for a while."

"Huh?"

He walked over to me, and I looked up at him.

"I'm not sure how you'd react if I told you. But I can't hide it anymore. It's been eating away at me... for a long time now."

"What?"

He closed his eyes for a moment or so, before reaching up to my head. I jerked back a little, thinking he was going to hit me or something, but I felt something on my antennae. My eyes widened at the sensation and I let out a choked sound. The sensation got stronger and I realised he was running a finger along my antennae. I could feel my senses tingling. A wave of something unknown to my physiology coursed throughout me. My body was responding to it in a way I've never felt before. But it was almost like... bliss? Like that feeling I got whenever I sat and watched the earth's sun set, but this was much more powerful.

I felt my legs go lax, and I slid down a little until I was sitting on the bench in the stall. Dib paused for a moment, before I felt my other antennae start to be caressed in the same way. His movements were gentle, and for that I was thankful. I was about to fall asleep when he stopped.

"Zim..." he said softly, sitting beside me on the small bench.

"Why... did you...?" I asked, peering at him.

"I've always wanted to touch them... ever since I first learned you had them."

I just let in a small breath. "You did not hurt me."

He shook his head. "I don't think I ever could..."

"Why? Why do you not want to hurt me anymore...? Is it because Zim cried? Zim feels hurt?"

He shook his head. "No... it's because... I like you, Zim. I... care about you."

My eyes widened and I drew back a little. "You like me?"

He nodded. "I can't deny myself of it anymore. You mean the world to me, Zim. You were the only thing that kept me from giving into depression. If it weren't for you coming to earth, I think the loneliness of not having my mother around, a neglectful a family and also no friends would have drove me to suicide. But you changed all that."

"Mother?" I asked. "You have a mother?"

"...I used to. She died when I was ten."

"Oh..." my antennae dropped. "How?"

"Breast cancer."

I was feeling something different from the Dib as he said this. My antennae couldn't pick up on emotions, but at the same time I was feeling a wave of sadness emanating from the human. I had never known what it would be like to have a mother and a father. But I knew that most humans had them and that was what made them a family. Irkens were raised to have nobody.

I couldn't imagine what it must have been like for Dib.

"I'm sorry..."

"No Zim... it's not your fault. You helped me move on... she always told me to believe in what I wanted to believe, and it didn't matter what it was as long as I was happy. It didn't matter what anybody else thought. She was like me... she taught me about the paranormal and aliens and ghosts... that's why I was so excited when you got here."

"Excited? I thought you hated me."

"I did yeah... but, at the same time I was excited. You gave me motivation."

"That's good, I guess."

"More than you think." Dib smiled at me. "I'm glad you came here."

"Even if I am here to conquer your planet?"

He sighed at that.

"But why? I don't want you to take away my home... my memories of my mother. It's not fair."

I frowned. "But... I can't dishonour my Tallest. I have to take over this planet. It's what I was sent here for. I can... spare you, I guess."

Dib stood up.

"Zim... you can't take over my planet! I grew up here! I have a home, a family! A neglectful one yeah, but they are still my family. How would you feel if a race took over Irk? If everything you had was destroyed?"

I had never thought of it like that. "But the Irken Empire is the best. Nothing can top it."

"You're from a race of egotistical selfish jerks, Zim. Nobody wants to be a slave! Your race isn't the best! You just think that!"

I glared. "At least my race is superior!"

"What, because you take over planets and force others from their homes?"

"..."

"What do you gain from it? Happiness?"

I sighed. "I don't gain happiness from it, Dib. But I am loyal to my leaders and my mission."

Dib shook his head a little, before sitting down beside me.

"Can't you just... not take over earth?"

"But then what is my worth as an Invader? Ever since my birth I have wanted nothing more than to be respected by my Tallests and prove my worthiness to the Irken Empire."

"But can't you understand why I've hated you? It's just not fair Zim. I don't want my home to be destroyed by your people."

"I don't want to see you destroyed Dib. I like this planet. But I must fulfill my purpose."

"But what if it didn't have to be this way? What if there was another purpose for you besides destroying my planet?"

"Like what?"

"You always have a choice Zim."

I stared at him at that. There was a long silence between us. My antennae perked again as I heard students enter the change room.

"I... should go. I'm glad you're okay, Zim."

"Dib..."

He looked at me, before turning and opening the lock of the stall.

"Dib... wait..." I asked softly.

He looked back at me. "I have to go Zim..."

And with that he turned and left, leaving me sitting there confused and bewildered on the bench. For the first time in my life, I felt lost.

But I also felt alone.


	11. An Inner Desire

**A/n:**

**AdmiralPeach:** JHONEN SEX. And a helping of moose.  
**FantomoDrako: **Talked to you on dA about that error lol ^_^ and don't worry, as I said I don't plan to rush into things. Rushing just ruins stories and most people tend to do that instead of just letting them build up to a climax. And I love going into things that you don't see on the show. If only they had of finished the series, we could have seen more of that. Thanks for reviewing!  
**Crazy Theatre Chick: **He will soon 3  
**ToRRiS: **^^ thank you. Glad you liked it.  
**M00-M00: **Yep. :]  
**YaoiGirly: **Thank you ^_^ Don't worry about that. They will stay in character. I **hate** OOC Zim/Dib. XP  
**Captor of the Crazies: **But then that would be rushing the story. Let it build, that WILL come I promise you, you will just have to be patient :] I'm a hardcore ZADR fangirl as well, but if I go into it to quick it would just compromise the structure/flow of the story. So, just let it build :] And possibly, yes, in later chapters. ^^

Thanks for the reviews. Glad you are enjoying it so far. Back to Dib again now. Not much going on in this chapter, but focuses on Dib and his obssessivness.

* * *

**Chapter 11  
**  
Dib's P.O.V

Leaving the change room and Zim like that, I couldn't help but feel a little guilty about is as I walked out of the gym. Especially from the way he had called out after me. He had sounded so confused. So lost. I wondered deep down if perhaps he was torn about what had just transpired between us. I knew he wanted to be friends as well, but that damn alien! He was so freaking stubborn. I knew that his mission was important to him, but he was so dedicated to his 'Tallest' and his Empire that it was basically the only thing he seemed to live for. I wondered if anything else mattered to him. He had seemed upset when I had told him about my late mother, though. Maybe that had filled him with some kind of remorse.

Zim being Zim, I would never have expected him to call out after me, but I had to take into consideration what had happened between us over the past two days as well. I believed that was a major contributor towards how we had been towards each other lately. And it had all started because I had helped Zim instead of just leaving him. When I thought about it, it was funny really. Five years of hatred and that one little situation changed everything. How I perceived the Irken.

I was still a little shocked that he had allowed me to touch his antennae. I don't know why I did it. For years I had wanted to feel them and I guess that seemed like the perfect moment. I had confessed to the alien that I liked him, but I didn't confess anything more than that. I was glad about that because I was still afraid of Zim's reaction and the chance he would reject me was still there. Even if it had taken me five whole years to stop hating the Irken and three months of contemplation, really this was the bare foundations of the building. I didn't want to destroy my chance before I even had it. And I had told him how I really felt about him now and that I wanted nothing more than his friendship. Knowing him he would probably need more time to take that knowledge in, because I still couldn't tell for sure how he was feeling about me. I knew he was sad. He had proved that to me after I'd seen him cuddling his pig on the couch, but if he found out about those cameras he'd probably try to kill me.

I was rather intrigued at how he had responded to the antennae rub though. The moment I had touched them, it had sent some kind of strange sensation through him. Perhaps they were sensitive. He had even nearly fallen asleep at one point. I smiled. It was quite cute. His antennae were delicate, but they had an unusual rubbery texture to them. I had kinda expected they would, but I had never known for sure. In the past I had examined bugs that possessed feelers, wondering what they were used for and researching them, but because Zim was sentient and antennae were natural to his race, it clarified to me that perhaps he used his antennae differently from bugs. I had a feeling his antennae allowed him to hear as he didn't have ears. In the past I had also observed the various positions he held them at and learned what each position meant. If they were relaxed, at a 45 degree angle slightly above his head (the normal position he held them at) he was calm. If they were slinked further back than this, he was tense or anxious. If they were rigid and perked right up above his head he was scared or shocked, and if they were pinned flat forward, pointing directly over his face he was pissed. When I had hurt him yesterday, he had them slinked towards his back. I had never seen him position them that way, but I had known almost instantly what that position indicated.

Hurt. Pain.

I sighed.

Often I'd wondered what it must be like having antennae. Sometimes I had almost envied him for it because I knew his senses were far better than a humans. And the fact his eyes were so big, his vision must be incredible. He could see in the dark. One time there was a blackout in the neighbourhood, and Zim had been at my house annoying me with some kind of floating moose thing he had created (I swear he called it Minimoose) and as I was trying to remember where I had put my key chain light in the dark, he had already gone downstairs and come back up with the torch. I hadn't even told him where it was located, and since that moment, I knew he must have some kind of night vision. Like his antennae, his eyes were quite interesting. He had no pupils, so it was very difficult to tell what exactly he was looking at. The only real indication was the light source in his eyes. Another time I had been down in his base trying to infiltrate it, and one of the lights had blown itself. I had my night goggles with me, and when I put them on I saw him. He'd found me and chucked a huge fit at me, but then asked me how to change it because it was a normal 'earth glowy thing' as he'd described it and not a 'superior Irken light maker.' He'd seemed rather surprised when I explained it worked the same as an Irken light, but then I had been even more surprised when he had looked directly at me and his eyes were just two red circles. Ever since that moment, I had wondered how his eyes worked.

Zim was a very unique alien. Even more so unique because he was so similar to a human, despite his bug-like resemblance. At times I'd wondered how he was born or if he had real parents, besides those decoys. There was still so much about him I didn't know, and I knew that if we became friends, perhaps I'd be able to finally seek the answers to those questions.

I had been quite shocked seeing him today. Actually, I was thrilled. It had been the very first time I had seen Zim out of his uniform, let alone his body! Well, that was a lie. I'd seen him in his gym clothes, but he'd always covered any part of his skin up. I hadn't expected him to be in just gym shorts, and when Zita had told me he had run into the change rooms, I had been holding my breath. I got even more than I had bargained for to see him out of his disguise. After five years of wondering, now I knew what he looked like. He was very slender. Past anorexic, but that was natural for his race and he wasn't in bad heath. He had nothing on his chest. It was just smooth and green. No naval. Nothing but smooth flat green skin. He had no imperfections or flaws, like I had. But what had surprised me about him the most was his fingers. He had claws. There were no evident nails, but each of his three fingers hooked into a kind of talon. As did his feet. He only had two toes. When I had led him into the stall they had made slight tapping sounds as they hit the tiled floor. My hand also got a little scratch on it. His talons were quite sharp.

I almost fell into the pool because I was so wound up in my thoughts. At the last second I veered away and ended up tripping over a stray away volley ball.

"Ugh..."

Ignoring the laughter from the other students, I pushed my glasses back up and headed back to class. I'd left class today specifically to find Zim as I had been worried about him since last night. I was also going to confront him about the project, but seeing him half naked had kind of... intrigued me and made me forget about it completely. As I had told myself countless times before, I wasn't gay, but damn. Zim was a naturally attractive male alien. I didn't care how much of a xenophile that made me, because that thought was true and I knew it was, no matter how much my paranormal large brain tried to reason with me otherwise.

I nearly walked into the gym door thinking about that, and shook my head, trying to snap myself out of my little fantasy of Zim. Oh God how wrong that sounded when I truly thought about it. But at the same time, I just didn't care. If Zim was attractive and I liked to fantasize, let alone constantly obsess over him, than so be it. It wasn't doing any harm to anybody else, and it made me feel good. Everybody hated me anyway and called me a fag and queer, so if it appeared I was gay it wouldn't make much of a difference.

Perhaps deep down I was gay and I just didn't want to admit it. Or maybe I just had an extreme case of OCD when it came to the alien. One way or another, that alien was my sanity.

And one way or another, I knew I needed him.


	12. A Scare

**A/n:**

To make up for that short chapter, here's another. Not sure how this will turn out, its 2.54am and I'm just going with the flow lol.

Typical iTunes would play the YMCA song just after I write about Dib obsessing over Zim and wondering if he might be gay. . .

My hands are ice and it's freezing cold even though I'm writing this from my bed and I'm hungry but anyway...

AND OMG. IZ season 1 on sale tomorrow!ONE1!ONE! Woo!

Anyway.

Sorry if this isn't that good. It's too early in the morning right now and I need sleep.

* * *

**Chapter 12  
**  
Dib's P.O.V

The teacher yelled at me quite a few times during the rest of the lesson but I was so zoned out about seeing Zim's green Irken body that I hardly noticed. Usually I'd be paying attention as science was my favourite class, but today I couldn't care less. I had a new kind of science that interested me. I smiled a little to myself at the thought of Zim wanting to be friends and what it would be like. I hoped it would happen because truthfully I was sick of our screaming matches about who was the superior being. The feelings that had been rising inside since Zim tripped were just about overflowing. I was still zoned out that when the bell rang I jumped. The teacher just shook his head at me, and rushed off to his next class.

I packed away my books and notes, before leaving the classroom to head to English. As I was about to step into the classroom, Mr. Elliot stopped me, tapping me on the shoulder and asking me to step aside for a moment for a word. I followed him, wondering what this could possibly be about. He turned back to face me and gestured me to sit down on a bench we had arrived next to.

"Hi Dibothen," he spoke, and I cringed at hearing my full name. "Sorry for the interruption, I need to ask you a few questions and you seem to be the most suitable student to consult."

"What's going on?" I asked. I was curious now.

"Now, I know you are friends with that green child. Zim?"

"Zim? Zim isn't my-" I cut myself off for a moment or so. "What's this about?"

He put a finger to his mouth in contemplation as he looked at me. I realised then who this guy was. He was Gaz's old teacher back in elementary, but he was also Zim's homeroom teacher.

"I've noticed Zim keeps to himself a lot in homeroom. He distances himself from the other students and never participates in activities or even just chats among the students. I'm concerned he's being bullied. I've noticed you talk to him a lot, and was wondering if he's said anything to you?"

I swallowed a little. A teacher being concerned about anybody else I wouldn't have cared less, but Zim was a different story. The last thing Zim needed was a teacher asking questions about him.

"Well, he gets bullied quite a bit. But so do I."

"I see. Do you think this is why he distances himself?"

I shook my head. "He's... always been that way."

"Would his 'skin condition' have anything to do with it?"

I felt my books slide out of my lap onto the ground, creating a small commotion as students stopped to stare at me. I swallowed.

"Well, he's paranoid about it. He always has to put up with people asking about it."

"But, it's quite odd. Green skin, no ears OR nose, and only three fingers on each hand. And all of this is because of a 'skin condition?'"

Fuck.

"Uh..." I stuttered. "It's a very rare condition. So far Zim has been the only known case."

"I see... anyway, I need to go to class. Thank you for your time, Dib."

He stood up and left, leaving me to bite my lip. I picked up my books and headed into class. Now I had something else to worry about and it involved Zim's personal safety. There was no way in hell now I wanted Zim hauled off to the authorities, especially after all that had happened. I would have to tell him about this. After taking my seat, I looked at the door hoping to see a flash of green among the other students, but Zim didn't come. Soon Miss Sowourz arrived and slithered into her seat. I started to worry a little, but then just as she was about to shut the classroom door without moving an inch from her seat, the alien finally entered.

He was back in his Invader uniform and his hair seemed a little damp. His gaze crossed mine as he took his seat. Miss Sowourz stood and began the lesson.

While she had her back turned, I scribbled out a note to Zim, careful to hide it when she turned her head sideways.

_I need to talk to you. It's very important._

I threw the note towards him, and he looked at me, seeing it fall beside his desk out the corner of his eye. He leaned over and picked it up, unravelling it and looking at it. I looked back towards the teacher for a few seconds before turning to see him scribbling down a response. Shortly after, the note hit me in the head. I scowled a little at his perfect aim, and unravelled it after picking it up.

_Ok. Is Dib angry with? Bad feeling. Before.  
__**  
**_I had to re-read his sentence a few times before I finally understood what he was asking. I was pretty sure he meant that he felt bad about before. My eyes widened a little at this, before I stuck my tongue out as I scribbled back my response.

_No, it's something else. Very important. Regards your safety/protection. We need to do project. Talk at recess._

I threw the note back at him. The teacher turned just as I did so, but thankfully Zim caught the note this time and quickly hid it. I picked up my pencil as if I was writing on my notebook.

The lesson droned on. Sowourz, as usual, talked about something totally irrelevant to the course and how rabid weasels had contributed to the rising amount of drowning around the state. I put my head into my hands, looking across to Zim a few times. One time I looked across, he actually had his hand slipped under his wig a little and I realised he was scratching his head. Or antennae. I smirked a little. When the bell finally rang, I gathered my things and slowly walked over to his desk. He was picking up his books and looked up at me.

"H-hey."

"Dib-sm-... Dib."

"Wanna... go outside? To the loser's area?"

His eye twitched a little, but he gave me a tiny smile. "Sure. Why not."

He pushed in his chair and joined me as we started to walk out of the classroom, but just as we were about to step out of the door, the Sowourz appeared in front of us.

"The assignment. On my desk. 3pm. If not, you both will be setting up decorations."

"Yes sir." Zim replied, while I just nodded. We hurried away from her before both of us froze over from her icy draft.

It was quiet as the two of us walked, avoiding students that threatened to knock us over. When we finally arrived outside, I had to jerk Zim backwards under the shelter as it had started to rain. Well, damn. Now where were we going to sit? The loser's area was the best as nobody came near us, but we couldn't go there now. Then I remembered the corridor where the boiler room was. It was usually deserted.

"Come on. I know somewhere secluded."

I took him by the hand again, careful not to startle him too much, and led him to the corridor. After a short walk, we arrived there and I sat down against a wall. He did the same, but kept a small distance between us as I predicted he would.

"What did you mean?" he asked me.

"Huh?" I looked at him.

"Silly forgetful hyooman," he smirked, shaking a hand at me. "Note. To Zim."

Oh.

"Mr. Elliot spoke to me today, Zim. He asked me if I knew anything about you being bullied, and then he was questioning your 'skin condition.'"

Zim's eyes widened.

"What?"

I nodded. "If he's started keeping an eye on you, he might find out about you not being human."

"He questioned me today." Zim told me. "During that homeroom class thing."

I bit my lip again. "This is bad Zim. We can't have a teacher asking about you."

"We?"

"Well... you I guess. But I'm going to help you... you know."

"Why?"

"Because..." I looked at him. "I told you I cared about you Zim. I meant it."

He stared back at me, but I could see a small change in his expression.

"I-I really do want to be friends." I added, somewhat hesitant. I had no idea what he would say to that. But it was an answer I had been longing to hear.

"So do I, Dib."

"You do?" I perked up a little.

He rolled his eyes. "I just told you, Dib! Isn't it obvious from my amazing answer? Zim has agreed! Relish in your victory!"

Ugh.

"Well... that's great."

He nodded. "So... what does this 'friends' mean?"

I almost choked on air.

"You don't know what it means?" I hadn't expected that.

He shook his head. "Does it hurt?"

I snorted. "No Zim. Being friends means having fun. If you have a friend, you have somebody you can talk to or rely on. If you have a close friend you have somebody that you can trust enough that you can tell them a secret and they would never tell it. A close friend is also somebody you can count on to cheer you up if you're down or sad, or talk to about problems."

Zim stared at me for a good while after I said this.

"And you want this between us?"

I nodded. "...Do you?"

"I'd much rather be able to rely on you than have you constantly slandering me or threatening to pull my squeedily-spooch out."

I nodded slightly. "How... do you feel though? About before and... about me calling you a failure...?" I asked him carefully.

He went quiet. "It still hurts, Dib-friend. But... Zim is... feeling better. Kind of."

"I'm really sorry. I truly am."

He nodded. "You have no need to repeat these 'apollygies.'" He shook his hand at me.

"Apologies."

"Yes, yes."

"Were... you okay with what I did before?"

"Hm?"

I looked up towards his head. He still didn't seem to get the message, so I slowly drew closer to him and reached up to pull his wig away. He cringed a little, but allowed me to do so. I watched as those fine black stalks rose from their flattened position on his head, and let out a sigh.

Zim eyed me carefully, and I raised a finger to graze one of the appendages. He let out a tiny grunt as my finger made contact with it.

"This..." I said quietly.

He jerked his head away from me slightly and his antennae perked right up. I recognized that position, but he was more shocked than afraid.

"Why do you like them, Dib?" he asked me.

"I don't know..." I replied honestly. "I guess it's because you're the alien."

"So are you."

My eyes widened slightly at the response, but he was totally right. I stared into those fake purple eyes.

"Take... out your contacts... I want to see the true you."

"But..."

"It's okay. Nobody will come."

He looked at me, but did as I asked. He reached up and pulled the lenses out, and those magenta eyes were revealed. I stared into them, almost getting lost for a moment or so.

He waved a hand in front of my face to snap me out of it.

"You are amazing, Zim."

He grinned. "I know!"

I rolled my eyes and hit him gently. "Well... I guess we should start this stupid project. Do you have anything to add to it? I know you were looking up sex and I was looking up love." I could feel my face start to burn thanks to my stupid feelings.

"Kinda," he replied, reaching into his pod. "Here."

He handed me some notes, and I stared at them. Half of them were in Irken.

"Zim, I can't read this."

"Oh." He took them back from me. I was about to ask if he had any other notes, when there was the sound of footsteps approaching. Horrified, I stood up pulling Zim up with me, who was frantically trying to put his disguise back on. I tried to block his way as somebody came into view, but they had already spotted Zim behind me and dropped their books.

"I-I..." I stuttered. "He.."

The person came forward a little and the light hit their face.

Lock me in the underground classroom for the rest of the year and I'd be ok. Lock me with Miss Sowourz in a dungeon with no food for three weeks and still I'd be ok. I'd rather be trapped in the sewers than in the position I was right now.

Because it was the last person we needed to see at the moment. And he had seen Zim out of his disguise.

A teacher too damn nosy for his own good.

Mr. Elliot.


	13. An Unpredicted Fall Out

**A/n:**

**Captor of the Crazies:** Doooooon't worry. As I said in the description, it will 'spruce up later on' XD.  
**theendisnie aka MOOSE: **Yes really really really painful! If they walk past, make them bow down in respect! WE LEAK MAIL AND BUTT-RUBBING, FACE IMPREGNATING AWESOMENESS. Just cuz we are both awesome like that. I am glad I have revived you! It's like my job.  
**Crazy Theatre Chick: **As much as he tries to deny it, it's so obvious XD  
**Ray n Anthony: **Thank you ^_^  
**Nat Kicker of Shins: **Will do XD  
**Ellara: **He he XD. I like to make things cute without being all too sappy. Don't worry, there will be more moments! And Elliot is the guy in the 'Parent Teacher Night' episode that says to Dib 'I didn't know your dad was a floating head!'  
**YaoiGirly: **I know! D It won't be as bad as you might think in the end though.  
**ToRRis: **You'll see ^^ And lol XD Glad you like it!  
**M00-M00: **Not anymore!

Wow, 76 reviews so far. Thanks guys.

BTW, if you are like me and find that music helps relate to the characters, or reminds you of them, listen to Nero's Me and You. It's pretty good! Or Strange Relationship by Darren Hayes is also fitting (lol)  
**  
**

* * *

**Chapter 13**

Zim's P.O.V.

In all the five years I had been on Earth, I hadn't felt as nervous anymore to let myself become careless around the humans, as I knew that most of them were stupid. I could walk out into my garden without my disguise and they wouldn't even bat an eyelid. I had felt relaxed enough around Dib to let him take off my head covery and remove my contacts, because he already knew about me and I was somehow sure now, that after the things that had gone on between us, he wasn't going to try to expose me. I hadn't had enough time to hide myself when that nosy, pesky human had noticed us there. Dib was doing his best to hide me, and all I could do was hope to Irk the stupid teacher hadn't seen me.

"Dib?" I heard him say, as I struggled to get in my contacts.

"Mr Elliot! What are you doing...here?" I heard my new friend reply.

"I was asked to check the temperature in the boiler room. But more importantly, what are YOU doing down here? This area is out of bounds to students! And who is that behind you?"

Perhaps the foolish human hadn't seen me after all!

"Uh... Zim."

"Zim?" came his response, and I hid behind Dib as he approached us. Just as he peered around Dib to look at me, I had managed to fix my head covery back into place. Dib also turned to look at me, and I could see a look of relief over his features.

"I... could have sworn you looked different. But it was too dark to tell for sure."

I put a hand to my racing heart. I could tell Dib felt the same way as well. A major flood of relief had washed over the two of us.

"You... didn't see Zim?"

"I did, and I thought I saw something on his head, but perhaps I was just imagining things."

"Heh... yeah, it's dark down here." Dib replied, laughing a little and putting a hand to his head.

"Anyway, you two better get out of here. I didn't expect to find you both here, but I have a feeling I know why you're both down here and not with the rest of the students."

"W-why?" Dib asked.

"You both get bullied, right? I understand why you'd rather be isolated."

"Uh... yeah." Dib looked at me. "Right Zim?"

I nodded. "Yes...!" I drew out. "We'd much rather be away from the other filthy dirt childs."

The Elliot-human raised an eyebrow at me, before shaking it off. "Of you go boys. I'll see you later."

He turned around and left for the boiler room, leaving us standing there in slight shock. My heart was still racing inside of me.

"Okay... bad idea." Dib said. "I'm so sorry Zim... I-I didn't know he'd come... I shouldn't have asked you to..."

I stared at him.

"It's not your fault, Dib-friend." I should have felt angry. But I didn't, because I knew he was telling the truth. I was just lucky that human's were blind and couldn't see in the dark.

"I know but... I think he might have been lying. About checking the temperature."

"Hm? How?" I asked, wondering how he knew that or had concluded that.

"Look." He turned to look at something, and I followed him with my gaze. There was a digital gauge above us, with the temperature of the boiler room on it.

"Let's get out of here..."

Dib took me by the hand and we ran out of there. He led me back through the hallways towards the cafeteria. But I pulled him back a little as he went to enter it.

"No, Zim doesn't want to go in there." I told him. "I... liked the quiety-ness."

He looked at me. "But... we can't go to the losers area. It's raining." He looked towards a window beside us, looking out over the front skool-yard. "I know! What if we go to the library!"

"Liberry?"

"Library. It's usually quiet and hardly any students go in there."

"Okay." I replied, and he gestured for me to follow. After a short walk we arrived at the 'library.' A teacher behind the desk at the front stared at us as we entered. I avoided her gaze as she looked towards my superior form. These stupid humans and their staring.

Dib led me towards the back of the library to a group of tables there. It was secluded with the bookshelves blocking our view from the teacher up the front. The human sat down and I sat down across from him.

"Okay... so how should we start this?"

I shrugged.

"Well... she wants it by three. We have to do it Zim. I don't want to be stuck in the underground classroom for the rest of the year and I'm sure you don't want to be either."

I sighed. Of course I didn't! Having the Elliot-human suspicious of me was bad enough. I reached into my PAK and pulled out my notes, setting them on the table. Dib looked towards them.

"Do you have them in English?" he asked me. "I didn't get a chance to ask before.

I shook my head. "No. I do most of my homework in Irken. The computer usually does the homework for me. It is neat."

"That's unfair Zim! So while we have to slave away, your computer does everything for you?"

I raised the ridge of my eye at him. "I work, Dib-human. On plans. I have no time for this homework you hyoomans are required to do."

"But then, how do you pass so many things?"

"What?"

He sighed. "Never mind. Just... could you maybe translate the notes for me?"

"By the time I get back, recess will be over. Are you sure?"

"Where are you going?"

"To the base to translate the notes."

Dib burst out laughing. "Zim, why don't you just translate them here! You know English!"

"Oh." I had gone to stand up, so I sat down again. Dib reached into his school book and pulled out some sheets of paper. "Here."

He pushed them towards me, and I looked at them. There were all kinds of funny diagrams and writings.

"I figured we could just paste all this info onto some cardboard. Make it like a poster. And you can write the stuff you found in English and paste it on as well. Assignment done and no underground classroom," he spoke as he leaned into his book bag and pulled out a rolled up coloured sheet of cardboard. He unfolded it and set it out on the table, also pulling out some paste. "I brought my pencil case, so here."

He tossed me a pair of scissors. I grinned.

"Cut-y things!"

He rolled his eyes. "Just do it Zim!"

I waved a hand at him. "Yes, yes, Dib. Do not worry that big head of yours."

He growled at me, before setting to work. I did the same, rewriting my notes into English. I felt a little sick as I recalled two nights ago, sitting at my computer and reading up on this 'sex.' My squeedily-spooch heaved inside of me and I gagged a little. Dib looked up at that.

"You okay?"

I nodded, and continued writing the notes. After I was done, I cut up my portion and we put everything together before sticking the notes onto the cardboard with the paste. Dib packed everything away and looked at his watch.

"Still got a few minutes." He spoke, looking towards what looked like two comfy human sacks. In the past I had learned the humans labeled them as 'bean bags.' I had no idea why such a sack would possess a name. They were filled with these strange little white balls, not beans. Stupid humans and their mis-judgement.

"Does Dib-friend wish to sit on the sacks?" I asked.

"Sure, if you like."

I nodded. The two of us stood up and went over to the sacks, sitting down in them. They were so comfy! I wondered why I didn't have one of these things in the base. I would have to get one. The Tallest would be awed if they knew about these things! It was almost as good as sinking into a blob of vlexargh goo!

There was a few moments of silence between us before the Dib looked at me.

"It was really unusual seeing you in gym shorts for a change."

I shuddered. "I would never do such a thing again. Zim was made to get into the pool."

"Are you sure you didn't burn? You were in a pool after all."

I shook my head. "I was wearing paste."

"You must've had a lot on."

"I bathe in it every day."

He nodded, before staring down at the ground. I wondered what he was thinking. It was hard to tell.

"Zim?" I looked at him.

"Do you ever get lonely?"

"Eh?" I asked, tilting my head slightly.

"Like, do you ever get homesick for Irk?"

I shrugged. "Sometimes. Earth is nice though. It'll be a shame to destroy it."

Dib let out a frustrated noise. "Can you just... stop?"

"Stop what?"

"Everything! I'm happy that we're finally actually getting along instead of ripping at each others throats, but when you come back with things like that, it's just annoying to hear. I don't want you to destroy my planet!"

"I am sorry, DIB, but I am on a mission. I do not plan to abandon it anytime soon. You will just have to accept it."

"I'm not going to accept it. I don't WANT to accept it."

"Well you're going to HAVE to."

"I don't HAVE to anything, Zim! You are not. Destroying. My. Home."

I leaned back a little as he sneered this towards me. He sighed, and looked down at the ground again.

"I'm afraid this is what will make us just go back to being enemies again, and I don't want that. Not after we've finally put our differences aside after five years."

"Then let's not worry about it for now."

"It's easy for you to say, Zim. You don't have that lingering feeling of knowing everything's going to be taken away from you."

I shook my head. "I won't destroy your home, or anything. You will be safe, and I can make sure of that."

He looked at me. "But you're going to enslave the rest of the world. It's not just my home I consider special. It's everything. Well, maybe not skool, but stuff I grew up around. Hurt Park is kinda special to me. My mother used to take me for walks there. I can't imagine waking up to see nothing but a barren wasteland."

"But Earth won't be a waste land. It will be modified to the Empire's liking."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well, the Tallest could make a parking structure planet out of it, or another snacking planet. Or perhaps a zoo."

"Zoo? What kind of zoo?"

"A hyooman zoo. Irkens would pay good monies for that. Perhaps other races would too... what's wrong?" I asked, when I noticed Dib was giving me a disgusted look.

"You would put humans on show in a zoo for your people's sick pleasure? What the fuck is wrong with you? We're not animals! You ass!"

I frowned. "What's wrong with that? You don't have to be a part of it. I already said I'd keep you safe."

"You just don't get it... you're just a stupid alien with no idea, Zim. No clue. About morals, or dignity. A self centered jerk. All you think about is pleasing those 'Tallest' of yours. They only think with their stomachs and not with their heads."

"Do not mock my leaders, hyooman!" I spat.

"Leaders?" Dib laughed. "Those two idiots wouldn't know how to lead shoe-string into a shoe."

I sneered. "Watch what you say!"

He looked at me. "Your problem is that you're too loyal Zim. It's a hopeless cause. You try to please them, but they only sneer and insult you behind your back. I've seen it!"

"LIES!" I spat.

"No Zim! I saw those transmissions. They only joke about you. You're nothing to them!"

"SCREW YOU!" I roared. "IDIOTIC HYOOMAN! You know what, I take back what I said! You can suffer along with the rest of your foolish race!"

"You won't take over the Earth. If you weren't so blind, you'd realise what I'm telling you is true."

"You're just jelly!"

"I'm not jealous of anything! I thought you were different Zim. I told you that you always had a choice! Maybe being your friend was just a stupid move on my half. I should have never helped you. You'll never change!"

"I don't want to be 'friends' with you anyway!" I sneered, though deep down I shattered yet again.

"Fine. I'm better off without you."

"Irkens need NOONE." I had nothing more to say to him. I stood up, and stormed out, leaving him there.

Once out of the library, I ran into the toilets, going into a stall and slamming shut the door behind me. I let out a frustrated growl before curling up on the filthy toilet. That hyooman! He made me so MAD! He had no idea how hard it was for me! Ten years after I was born I was ready to be an engineer. Seventy five years I worked hard to get up to an Invader rank. They didn't want me in OID1, but I showed them how good I was! I fought my way to get here. I have dedicated my entire life and worth to my Empire. Being an Invader is every Irken's dream! I know the Dib had a dream of being a 'paranormal investigator' or so he called it, so why couldn't he understand!

I had to destroy this pathetic planet, no matter how attached I'd become to it. Earth was nice. Much nicer than Irk, but my mission was so much more important, as were my leaders. My worth. I needed to prove I was better to them. OID2 was my chance for that, and Dib wasn't going to ruin it with his whiny-ness!

But the more I thought about him, the more it hurt. I felt my eyes leak a little, and hoped I wasn't going to cry again. Why did it hurt so much? We had just become 'friends' and now it was like we were back to stage one again. It was like nothing had ever changed between us in the first place. Maybe he was right and it was a mistake. We had a lot in common, but our races were what separated us. Our beliefs and goals was what made us different. I couldn't understand why this was making me cry though. Why should I care if what had happened between us wasn't supposed to last? I was an Irken, not a human. I didn't possess their stupid sappy emotions. Well, I wasn't supposed to, yet here I was crying once again.

Defect. Defective. That was the only reason I was crying. I was defective and because of that I felt those stupid hurty emotions.

In some way I did care for the human.

I jumped as the bell sounded suddenly. Wiping away my tears, I trudged back to class, not looking forward to it as I'd have to face the Dib. And as I had predicted, my day only got worse.

We didn't even look at each other. When I looked in his direction, he was looking away. I didn't know if he ever looked towards me at all, but I did the same. Before lunch, our math teacher had given us a task where we had to pair with somebody else to answer some questions. When I looked over at Dib, he had already partnered up with somebody else. I was left on my own, until I was paired with Zita by the teacher.

I sighed.

Boy was this female annoying. She spoke to me as if I was stupid, half the time turning around and chatting to Susie behind her. I was left to do the questionnaire alone. I hadn't expected the teacher to actually make us stand up and read our answers to the class. When it was our turn, Zita pushed me up and I was forced to stand in front of the stupid staring humans while I read out the answers I had put. Some of them I had just guessed, confused and unsure of what to write.

The students laughed at me as I got most of them wrong. I could see Dib out the corner of my eye. He wasn't laughing, but he wasn't showing any sort of emotion on his face. He looked at me boredly, but when I got the final answer right, the teacher clapped. I looked up, surprised.

"Congratulations. One answer finally right Zim! Looks like you were smart enough for the easiest question on there!"

Everybody burst out laughing at me. Zita. The teacher... the other students. Even Dib. I just threw the paper on the idiot's desk and sat down again. Annoyed and hurt.

Of course, when Dib got up, he got everything correct and was praised. He shot me a jeering look, but I just ignored it.

When lunch time came around, I left the skool building and retreated up to the roof again with my PAK legs. I didn't care what the Dib-shit did. It was boring up there, but while I was up there I was isolated, and that made me feel better. I worked on developing a new plan. I jumped when the bell rang again, indicating the final period of the stupid day.

I jumped down from the building and headed for class, spotting Dib in the corridor, talking to a few students. As I passed them to get to my locker, I could hear some of their conversation.

"...him? He's weird."

"Yeah, he's stupid too! Did you hear him today? He got ALL of the answers wrong, except for the last one, which was the easiest on the whole sheet!"

I paused for a moment. Clearly they were talking about me.

"He's not exactly smart. Just a stupid jerk. I hate him." came Dib's voice.

"Hang out with us Dib! It's cool you hate that freak!"

"Yeah Dib, you really hate him, right?"

I looked up at that. Dib made eye contact with me. We stared at each other.

"Yeah. Yeah, I do. I always have. He's not my friend. He's just a defective moron who will never change."

I felt my books slip out of my grasp and drop to the ground as that same pain I felt yesterday flooded into my squeedily-spooch. That caused them to turn around, and they spotted me. They laughed at me. Dib remained where he was. One of the students walked over to me, and I looked up at him. He hit me in the face, before squirting poop on me and walking into class with the other student. "Come on Dib!"

I looked at Dib again. He was still standing there watching me, but this time he didn't look angry, or bored. He looked confused. I think it was because my eyes had started to leak again.

He raised his hand, but by the time he had I was gone.

If he had said something after that, I didn't hear it.

Because I left him to talk to an empty space.


	14. An Unwelcome Reminder

**A/n:**

Oh the joy of their blooming relationship.

Back to square one. What will happen now? Will Dib-shit wake up to himself? Will things go back to what they were before? Oh the suspense.

Read on to find out ;) This IS a drama after all, ingest (injest – lol love u Nie) the drameryness.

**WARNING: **3am half assed brain deadness ahead.

* * *

**Chapter 14**

Dib's P.O.V

Great Dib.

Just fucking great.

I had raised my hand to apologize after that stupid stunt I had just pulled, but once again I was too late. I had saw him starting to cry before he ran off.

I felt like the worse person in the world at that moment. I just wanted to crawl into a hole and die. The fact I'd even spoken to those two dumbasses… what was the matter with me? It was selfish of me to do that. Rub the small popularity I had in Zim's face like that. It may have been the first time I was noticed, but I'd blown it again. Sure I was still pissed from what had happened before. But again I'd been the monster. Zim didn't deserve that. He didn't deserve any of the crap I'd dealt him the past two days! The number of times I'd hurt him was starting to grow and that wasn't a good sign.

There was one thing I truly despised. And that was becoming my father. But it looked like it was already starting to happen. I had promised myself when I was twelve that I would never become him. I loved my dad, but it was hard to considering he had never been there for me for the majority of my life. Always off busy inventing new and radical cures. Only once had he taken Gaz and I to an amusement park. And that was when my mother was still alive.

I really hated how he had treated us. He always had some form of excuse not to spend time with us, and when he did, it was usually only a one-off kinda thing. Like our family pizza night at Bloaty's. Once a year that happened. Just because he was the famous 'Professor Membrane.' If he was so hell-bent on a life of fame, why did he have me and my sister if he couldn't be bothered looking after us? I had raised Gaz myself. The two of us had to fend for ourselves when we were younger, because dad was rarely around. He made sure the shopping was done, but that was about it. I had to learn to cook and clean. I had to be the responsible one. I had to get Gaz out of bed for skool in the mornings. Instead of a parent being the one to do it, like in any other normal family.

I hated him for that.

Zim had helped me to escape from that. From the 'life' I had at home. He gave me something else to focus on other than the fact I had a neglectful father and pessimistic sister who wished I didn't exist half the time.

And now, I had pushed him away again. The one that gave me that little ounce of hope and strength I needed not to fall into depression and set myself up for a one way trip to the afterlife.

The Irken really got to me whenever he spoke about how he was going to destroy Earth. I had probably let it get to me way more than I should have, but it was hard not to get angry with him. Especially after he had told me that humans would make good zoo animals. That was just… wrong. How he could think that humans were only good for being locked up and on display? But then again, he had never said he would do it. He had said it was up to his 'Tallests' what would happen. He had wanted to keep me safe.

Was it really worth it letting Zim win? He promised he wouldn't destroy my home and memories. Everybody here treated me like crap. I had no friends, besides Zim. But now, he was gone again because I'd pushed him away. But how could I let him win when it was my home that would be destroyed? I just couldn't imagine Earth being ruled by green bug-eyed aliens. But nobody cared for me, so why should I care for them?

I sighed. I just couldn't decide. It was too big a decision for a seventeen year old. Hell, it was too big for anybody.

But I knew that I couldn't keep driving Zim away like this. He was my sanity and I needed him in my life. If he was gone, I'd have nobody. He was so damn important to me! He was basically the only thing I lived for. So why did I keep doing this? I had destroyed our friendship before it had even started!

"ARRGHH…" I let out a frustrated groan, and kicked at the lockers beside me. That's when I noticed Zim's books on the ground and his locker still wide open. I walked over to that area, bending down and picking up his books. I was about to pack them away into his locker, when something caught my eye. There was a picture pinned to Zim's locker door. I remembered that day clearly.

Zim had found my camera, and was taking pictures with it. He had pulled me into the picture, and GIR was behind us. We had made goofy faces. Zim had been in a good mood that day, and despite we'd been at each others throats not long after it was snapped, it was one of the best times I'd had with the alien.

In the photo we looked so, happy. So carefree. We looked like we were the best of friends, despite we had only been pulling those faces and manoeuvres for the camera. I must have stared at that picture for quite sometime, because the teacher yelled for me to get into class, snapping me out of my thoughts. I took Zim's books with me and closed his locker, figuring we would most likely have homework.

The lesson just dragged on. Society and Environment was the most boring class at the hi-skool. Our teacher for it, Mr. Hardsgrove, was old, lanky and boring. He could hardly stand straight half the time. Thankfully though, he wasn't the type to pick on students and was rather friendly compared to the other teachers. Even though it was boring, I preferred this class the most to my other classes. Apart from science, which was my top favourite.

Finally the day ended. As I had suspected, we received homework. Before I was about to step out of the door to head to Miss Sowourz lair and give in the assignment, an announcement came over the intercom.

'Attention all teenagers and mentally incapacitated flops! Tomorrow is… you guessed! Halloween! You are all expected to dress up as something scary! Or stupid! If you don't you'll go to the UC! Now go home and quit bothering us!'

I groaned. Great.

Friggin great.

Pushing that bad news aside for the time being, I rushed to my teacher's lair (or dungeon, I still don't know) to put the assignment on her desk. I made it just in time, as she rose from the shadows. I shuddered.

"Dressing up, tomorrow, Dib?" She hissed. Yep. Definitely related to the Bitters. No doubt about that now.

"Uh… I guess."

She nodded. "Go. Go home."

I turned and bolted out of there. Man, she was spooky!

I grabbed some stuff from my locker and shoved it into my book bag, making my way out of the hi-skool. Gaz was waiting for me by the gates, her arms crossed and her foot tapping.

"So, it's Halloween tomorrow. What're you gonna dress as?" she asked as I approached. "A 'paranormal investigator' again?"

"I dunno… maybe not."

"Ghost?"

I shook my head.

"Alien?"

Alien. I'd never thought of going as an alien before.

"Werewolf?"

Werewolf. That sounded good too. So many ideas.

"I don't know. Maybe an alien. Werewolf sounds good too. I still have that costume from that skool play years back."

"I'm going as a Vampire Piggy Huntress," she told me, and I nodded. "They have these cool costumes at the mall. I'm gonna head over there. Dad's not home."

"He never is." I replied. "Don't be long."

"Yeah, sure." she replied, turning and heading in the direction of the mall. I watched her walk off. My little sister had grown into quite an attractive young woman. She didn't take any hot-stuff talk from any guys though, usually making them wish they were never born and sending them to a world of pain if they tried to hit on her. My sister was able to look after herself now and I was glad. She didn't party, or drink, like the other idiots at the skool. Instead she liked her video games, chatting online to other gamers, or just drawing. Gaz had no friends, like me. But she liked being alone.

After she had gone, I headed for home. But then stopped as Zim crossed my mind. I wondered if he was aright. Eventually my concern got the better of me and I made my way to the cul-de-sac where he lived. I hesitantly walked up to the front door, thankful that the gnomes didn't start to fire lasers at me. Even if I didn't exactly feel ready to see him, I had to give him his homework. Quivering slightly, I reached up to press the doorbell, when I noticed the door was open. Curious, I pushed it open a little. I was afraid of how he'd react to me coming into his home, but I was more concerned about his emotional state than what might possibly happen. I peered around the door as it opened.

"Z-Zim…?"

Pushing the door open a little more, I dropped the books I had been holding.

The sight that greeted me?

I would never ever have expected to see.


	15. A Devastating Blow

**A/n:**

Sorry guys for keeping you in suspense for so long. Truthfully, I've had other things to get done for university (final assignment and exam) so I haven't had the time to work on this as well as other things. I've also had writers block. I won't reply to reviews this time round sorry, but I will do so after I get these next two chapters posted. For this chapter, we will go back to Zim's POV. You will see why at the end of the chapter and how it ties into Dib's perspective following the end chapter 14. Afterwards, the normal pattern will resume of Dib Dib Zim. (except it will go from Dib, Zim after this chapter due to chapter 14 being Dib's POV). Thank you to all who have reviewed so far and I am glad you are enjoying it. I would never have expected to top 100 reviews for this, so I am really happy people are interested in it.

I hope you like these next few chapters. 

* * *

**Chapter 15**

[Special] Zim's P.O.V

I ran. I ran from that stupid hi-skool. Away from those stupid humans. Away from that stupid big-headed... ugh... MONSTER. I didn't care another class was on. I just wanted to get away from there.

I knew he would never change. He'd been the same way for five years towards me. I was gullible for listening to him. Lies. I was a defect, after all. A true Invader wouldn't have been as much pain as I was in. If the Dib's mission was to lie to me, and use that as some kind of trick to lure me in and hurt me, it was working. He'd already pushed me over and screamed in my face how much of a useless failure I was, and now this. What was next? I wouldn't be surprised if he knocked me out while I was in this stupid emotional state and take me to the authorities. I would have to keep my guard up from now on.

Pushing humans out of the way, I ran through Hurt Park. The stupid name seemed so fitting now. Everytime I'd ran through here in the past, I'd been hurt in some way and now here I was running through it again. I pushed more humans out of the way, not caring if some cried out. A stupid old couple holding hands forced me to stop with their slow-y movements.

"GET OUT OF THE PATH OF ZIM!" I roared.

The old human male turned to look at me. "Well I never..."

I pushed past them angrily, only to find more humans blocking my path. There seemed to be some stupid event type thingy going on, or human gathering. Usually these things were held in other parks, but of course, everything was against me today. I struggled to push my way past their disgusting slimy forms, nearly getting trapped between two dancing human females. They grunted as I squeezed past them.

"HEY! Watch it punk!" one spat at me.

I just spat out my tongue at them, and ran. I was in no mood to deal with them, but when I turned back, I noticed that they were chasing me, hands outstretched like rabid monkeys. I laughed at their pitiful attempts at running, before leaping out of the crowd over a dirt-childs head. Such a weak species. The mother of the dirt-child roared at me, but I ignored it. I ran a short distance, before stopping and turning around. To my disbelief, the females, the mother AND the old couple were all chasing me. I had no time to wonder about this, turning to run once again. I finally made it out of the park, heaving. I looked back again when I was suddenly hit in the face with a stick thing the old man was holding.

It knocked me to the ground, and I felt pain in my jaw.

"OK punk, you have this coming!" one of the females leaned over and droned into my face. I tilted my head in disgust trying to avoid her slimy drool. She stank like dirty feets.

"GET AWAY FROM MY BLOODS!" I yelled, hoping none of that drool went into my mouth.

She balled her fist and hit me in the face, making my head snap to the side and I cried out. I turned to glare up at her, and she backed away in shock. She'd knocked out my contact. This was my chance. I flexed all four of my PAK legs. The old man dropped the stick thing.

"Go away..." I hissed dangerously. I had had enough abuse from these pathetic creatures.

They turned and high-tailed out of there. Pathetic weak creatures. At least my eyes had stopped leaking for the time being. I picked up my contact and fixed it back in place, before using my PAK legs to leap my way home. Once I arrived there, I retracted my PAK legs and went inside, sprawling myself out across the couch. I didn't even bother to shut the door. I didn't know where GIR was, but Minimoose floated in and bumped into my head a few times.

"Squeak!"

I lazily looked up at the tiny moose. "Go way... lemme lone..."

"Squeak!" it squeaked again, rolling in midair before settling itself on my head. I groaned, tempted to pick the moose up and chuck it across the room. However it sat there for a few moments before floating up and rolling again, before flying out of the room. I sighed, sinking my head into the couch.

I could feel my eyes start to leak again. I was getting sick to death of this pitiful planet and the humans on it. I was sick of the Dib-shit and how he'd treated me over the past five years, mocking me, slandering me, hurting me and threatening to kill me. And now he was trying to trick me into being his 'friend.' I wasn't sure why I'd believed him so easily, after what he had done to me today. Dib-shit wasn't popular, yet he'd rubbed it right into my face about how stupid I was that I couldn't answer their stupid meaningless math questions. I couldn't tell anymore if his actions of hiding me from that Elliot-human were genuine. I wouldn't be surprised if they weren't and he was just building up a false-sense of security trap for me to fall into. Horrible pitiful stink creature.

I yanked off my wig and threw it aside, letting my antennae free, before peeling out my contacts and also tossing them aside. I just lay there, listening to dull hum the machinery around the house made. I hoped that GIR wouldn't come home from wherever he might have been anytime soon. I needed some time to myself.

It was a good while before I moved again. My legs were getting that strange tingly sensation I had heard the Dib-shit once refer to as 'pins and needles.' I sat up and kicked my legs out, trying to rid them of the horrible sensation. Eventually it passed and I sank back down. I couldn't help but wonder back to my conversation before with the human about 'friendship.' He'd told me it didn't hurt. If it didn't hurt, why was I feeling so much pain in my squeedily-spooch? I already knew it was because I was defective, but was it right for me to let this bother me so much? Shouldn't I just have not cared at all? I was an Irken after all, and we were raised to look out for only ourselves.

Why was I letting this get to me? I shouldn't be. I knew I shouldn't be. It was stupid.

Dib was just using me, that was it. Trying to trick me into being his friend. Perhaps this Elliot-human was in on whatever Dib-shit was planning as well. Foolish creatures. I was smarter than them. There was no way they were going to capture or hurt me! I was an Invader and I wasn't going to let my guard down like that again! If Dib-shit tried to talk to me, or apologize, I would just ignore him! He wasn't going to fool me again.

I angrily wiped at my eyes before crossing my arms. I knew I shouldn't have let this whole situation between us get to me, but I couldn't help it. The human obviously had had some kind of impact on my life during my time here on Earth. I couldn't deny myself of it, nor could I lie to myself and tell myself that I was just using that as some sort of pitiful excuse to hide how I truly felt. The human had grown on me. Like an Earth-leech. A Dib-leech. I cared about the stupid creature. I had valued the idea of a friendship between us. I would much rather talk with the Dib about what we enjoyed rather than have him tell me how much of a defective moron I was.

I didn't know if this 'friendship' thing would ever work between us now, however, considering how he'd been towards me over the past two days. First he made me fall over, then he called me failure, and now he'd rubbed his 'being noticed-edness' in my face as well. I scowled.

I was distracted out of my thoughts when the picture behind me started to beep, indicating a call from my dear leaders.

"Eh?" I yelped, jumping up from the couch and instantly trying to clean myself up a little. I straightened my antennae and wiped at my face again. I couldn't let the Tallest see me this way! I was just finishing straightening out my uniform when the picture flipped over to reveal a monitor as the transmission link between my base and The Massive was established. The familiar faces of Red and Purple appeared in front of me. Red was drinking soda.

I swallowed a little, and saluted my leaders.

"Greetings, My Tallest. Why do you call?" I asked. I was curious, but also confused. The Tallest almost never contacted me out of their own will. The last time they called me was... hm. I couldn't even remember.

"Oh, hi Zim. For once, we're actually glad to see you." Red replied, taking the straw out of his mouth. A fleet commander took the soda from him as he addressed me and I guessed it was empty.

"Glad to see me? Yes, of course! Just my very presence must amaze you!"

Red seemed to scoff a little at me at that statement. I frowned, but put it aside. I wondered what was going on. Purple was giving me this weird grin.

"Uh. Right." The Tallest looked at each other, before Purple finally addressed me.

"So Zim, how's the 'mission' coming along? Have you 'conquered' the planet yet?" he asked, gesturing with his four fingers as he emphasized his sentences. I wondered why he felt the need to, but I was intrigued.

"Well... I am developing plans. I still have much to learn about this pitiful planet before I ready it for the armada. Though, you will be pleased to hear that I have informed one of the gullible creatures of the many wondrous uses that Earth holds for our Empire."

"But, you haven't conquered it yet?"

"No. I am...eh... getting there." I grinned.

Red looked unimpressed. "You said that five years ago, Zim..."

I sighed. "I know... my apologies, My Tallest, but I do promise that this planet will be prepared for the upcoming badness within the next few months. I am sure I can... do a little cramming to ensure I know everything about this stupid rock before then, yes?"

"Don't bother Zim."

"And I can- what?" That took me off guard.

"You heard him! Don't bother." Purple said.

I thought I heard the front door creak a little at that moment, but was too busy paying attention to my leaders to notice. It must have been GIR. There was a slight thump.

"What... do you mean?" I asked, forgetting about that brief distraction. I frowned again. I'd never heard My Tallest address me in this type of manner before.

"What I said Zim, don't bother conquering the planet!"

"But... why not? That's my mission, isn't it? What I was sent here to do?" I was stunned.

To my surprise, Red and Purple shook their heads.

"Nah, Zim... you see, we never actually sent you to Earth to conquer it. We did tell you some years ago that we sent you there to observe the species, but that was never the real reason we sent you there in the first place."

I could feel my heart start to pound. "But then... why did you send me to Earth if I'm not here to conquer it?"

The fleet commander handed Red and Purple a box of doughnuts. Red took one out and starting eating it He flicked a hand at me.

"To get rid of you."

"Wh-what?" The pounding in my chest got worse. Was I really hearing this?

Red swallowed the doughnut and stared right at me.

"To. Get. RID. Of. You. Simple!"

"Rid of me..." I started to stutter. I could feel my knees start to go lax as my body started to quiver. "B-but... but why?"

"Because you're so... ANNOYING, Zim. We sent you out there on a 'mission' thinking there'd be no planet, and hoping you'd just drift forever in the vast of space, maybe even die, but being as annoying as you are, you somehow found that planet you're now on and started to annoy us again!"

"But... my mission... Earth... GIR..."

"There was never a mission, Zim! We lied to you to get rid of you, but for five whole years... FIVE YEARS ZIM, you've been bothering us with your pointless transmissions! The only reason we kept listening to you was because it amused us. Especially when things were going wrong for you! HA!"

Purple laughed as he ate a doughnut. "Ha, yeah! Like that time his brains almost got sucked out by that parasite!"

Red started to laugh as well. "Oh, remember that time... he called us in a bear suit! A BEAR suit! Ha!"

I just stood there in total shock, as My Tallest laughed at me. My own leaders, were laughing at me. I felt so crushed. My mission... it was a lie... a joke. Five years I'd been here wasting my time on nothing. Trying to take over a planet that I was sent to that should never have existed. I was supposed to die out here.

"G-GIR..." I managed to choke out, feeling my eyes start to leak again as my jaw started to quiver.

"Oh, that thing. We gave it to you on purpose, Zim. You know... to make you believe the whole 'you're an invader on a secret mission' thing. We made it out of garbage! You two were fit for each other!"

"B-but my T-tallest... I-I-"

"You what, Zim?" Red cast me an unamused glare.

"My mission... I... I'm an Invader..."

"Oh Zim, you were never an Invader." Purple spoke up. "You screwed up Operation Impending Doom One for us, remember? Blew up your own people? Not only that, you were the cause of Horrible Painful Overload Day AND Horrible Painful Overload Day Two!"

Red nodded, pointing an accusing finger towards me.

"You also killed Tallest Miyuki with that... energy creature... THING... of yours... and then you plunged Devastis into darkness for nine whole years because you wanted a snack! What is WRONG with you? Oh I know," Red bit into another doughnut. "You're defective."

My jaw dropped slightly and I fell to my knees.

"So, get lost Zim. You're a disgrace to the Empire. You're no Invader. You're just a defective flaw. An accident. You're PAK has about fourty trillion errors."

Red and Purple both watched me as my eyes started to leak rapidly. I couldn't stop myself.

"B-but... My Tallest... I'm sorry... I-I-I'm sorry... I really am... I promise, I can do better, I can!" I felt so pitiful. I was starting to beg. My life, my worth, my everything... it was crashing down around me. All I could hear was a loud rushing sound in my head. I felt like I was falling into a dark void. It was almost too much for my system to handle. My PAK started to beep, but I could hardly hear it over the rushing sounds. I could hear my heart pounding in my head... my pulse was racing. I was going into shock.

"Forget it Zim. This is our last transmission to you. After this, we're blocking all means of communication. Don't try to contact us again. And don't bother coming back, you're not welcome. If you try to, we'll blow your voot up."

"A drone is sending out the last of your belongings. From that weird base of yours on IRK." Purple picked up another doughnut.

"You're no longer a part of the Empire Zim. We're banishing you to Earth for the rest of your miserable life."

"Yeah..." Purple laughed. "Have fun there! Try not to get... diearghsectored!"

"Dissected, you idiot!" Red hissed, slapping Purple on the head. I hardly noticed.

"But... please... please just one more chance... I'm sorry... I-"

"Don't call us your 'Tallest' anymore, Zim. You're not a part of our Empire. Have a good life on that stupid planet! Maybe if we do decide to take over it, we'll blow you up too!"

"Ha ha, yeah! You've always liked blowing our stuff up! Now you can see how it feels too!" Purple grinned at me again.

"My... please... please don't do this! Please!" I was crying and begging them now. My whole worth was slipping out of my grasp and there was nothing I could do about it. My only resort was to beg for forgiveness from my leaders. My last resort... my final pleas.

But it was a hopeless cause. I was filled with the worst sort of dread I have ever felt as the transmission started to fade.

"NO... NO PLEASE! I'M SORRY!"

"Bye Zim!"

"Have a good exile! See you in... hm... I don't know... never!" Purple grinned at me one final time, as did Red.

The faces of my... ex-leaders vanished. And that was the last I saw of them before the screen went black.

"No..." I whispered. "No... no this cannot be..." I stared up at the screen, as if in some hope this was all a big joke and the Tallest would come back in a minute. But they never did. My ex-leaders... Ex. The word just about tore my squeedily-spooch in two. I wasn't on a mission, I wasn't an Invader. I was nothing... nothing at all... a waste.

"C-computer... re-reestabl...reestablish..."

There was a moment of silence, before my computers voice sounded.

"Reconnection to The Massive has failed. All communications lines are blocked. Access denied."

I broke down on the floor. My eyes leaked worse than they had ever had before. I couldn't stop. I was destroyed. My PAK was trying to process the overload, but it was struggling. I was losing it. I couldn't handle it any more. First the-Dib... and now my whole Empire hated me. My own race refused to accept me. If I wasn't an invader, what was I?

"Z-Zim?"

I hardly noticed the soft voice from the door frame. Through my blurred vision I made out a pair of black boots.

I couldn't move. I didn't care.

I just lay there and did the only thing I could do.

I cried.


	16. A Friend To Rely On

**A/n:**

A bit perky in this chapter, but I'm not rushing it! XD You'll just have to be patient! Enjoy and be sure to let me know what you think! 

* * *

**Chapter 16**

Dib's P.O.V

"Z-Zim?" I choked out.

I stepped over the dropped school books and went to his side. He sounded like he was choking. I couldn't blame him. I'd seen everything. I knew those Tallest of his hated him, but I'd never expected them to have disowned him from his own race.

Only just before I had yelled at him about his Tallest seeing him as a joke. Now I really regretted that. I was angry when I'd said it... but, Zim didn't deserve any of this. I felt so horrible. I had just made things worse. That poor alien. I wanted to punch myself in the head.

"Zim..." I said softly, kneeling down beside him and placing a hand onto his shoulder. "Zim... I-I"

There was silence. The only sound was the noise of Zim's sobs filling the room. Finally, there was slight movement and I heard him speak. His voice sounded raspy, full of grief and betrayal.

He sounded so... broken.

"A-are you here, to jeer Zim?"

"No... No I'm not..."

At that Zim pulled himself back slightly and looked up at me. "Why are you not happy, Dib-s-shit? You've won. I am no longer an Invader... you win.." tears streamed from his eyes. I'd never seen him look so depressed.

Not for the slightest moment did I want to scream victory in his face. I felt awful. There was no victory for me. The only victory I had was guilt. I had earned myself guilt.

I shook my head. "No Zim... I haven't won anything."

He looked a little confused. "I am exiled... my mission was-"

"Was a lie... I know. But I don't care about that..." I cut him off gently. "Zim, I'm not happy about this. What those two... bastards did to you, was low. Nobody deserves that."

Zim scoffed at me a little. "Only before, you told me they thought Zim was a joke... you were right. I do not understand why you are not happy about it, Dib-smell."

"What is there to be happy about Zim? If anything, I feel terrible. Even I hadn't expected such a horrible thing to happen."

"You've wanted this for five years... since I got here. You've wanted to win."

"Well, maybe I don't anymore!"

"Why not?"

"Because I CARE about you, Zim! I was worried about you, even after what happened today! That's why I'm here!"

"But you've won!"

I stood up. "Is that all you think matters? That I've won?" I threw my arms up. "Zim, it doesn't matter! I don't care if I won! There IS no victory for me. You're far more important to me right now!"

Zim sat himself up and pulled his knees to his chest.

"You hate me."

I shook my head. "No, I don't."

"But... today..."

"I was angry. I had reason to be... but... I still shouldn't have treated you that way."

"..."

I sighed, and sat down beside him. "Zim... I know things must be hard for you right now... but, as I said before, you always have a choice."

He looked at me. "I no longer have a choice. My life was my Empire."

"But that's GONE now, Zim! What other option do you have left?"

He looked to the ground, more tears filling his eyes. "Nothing, Dib. The only other option I have left is to self-destruct."

My eyes widened, and grabbed him by the shoulders. "NO! No, Zim! You're not going to kill yourself over this! You have so much going for you!"

"Like w-what?" his voice was raspy again. I felt my gut sink.

"You... you have so much potential. Who cares if you're not an Invader?"

"I do..."

"Well, I don't. You don't need them."

"What else is left for me, here? I am not wanted. I am not needed. Who needs me, Dib-shit?"

"...I need you."

The alien looked at me at that. I stared back at him.

"Please don't leave me..."

"You don't mean that... you'll just try to expose me... you always have tried to."

He turned away from me, crossing his arms.

"I don't care about that anymore."

"But you can have fame... monies... there is no reason for me to be here. I am no longer a part of the Irken Empire. You... can do with me as you wish, Dib-shit. Take me to the earth authorities. I don't care anymore..."

I took his arms and pulled them apart, before turning his head to face mine.

"I'd rather help my friend get through this than have fame."

He stared at me and I could tell he was having trouble figuring out my logic.

"Zim... I meant it when I said I cared about you." I told him softly. "I don't want fame over you. I want to help you get through this. I want to be there to comfort you... and make you realise you do have a purpose besides that stupid Empire."

"Do not insult my..." he trailed off, and just sighed. More tears streamed from his eyes.

Slowly I reached out, slightly shaking, and wiped away the tears from his cheeks. I could feel how badly he was quivering.

"Come here..."

He stared at me. I gestured my arms out to him. "Come on, come here."

He was reluctant. I leaned foward and pulled him down into my arms. He yelped a little. He was as stiff as a board against me.

"Don't touch me! Get your stinky hands away from- "

"SSHHHHH."

I reached up to his antennae and gently started to caress them, figuring it would calm him down. It did. Eventually he relaxed in my lap. Slowly, I wrapped my arms around him in a hug.

"W-what is this? What are you doing...?" he asked me.

"Comforting you. It's called a hug."

"Are you going to hurt me with your 'hug?'"

I laughed. "No, it's supposed to make you feel better."

Zim went quiet for a moment or so, before drawing back and looking at me. Yet again I found it difficult to tell where exactly he was looking. His eyes glistened.

"Why are you 'hugging' Zim? Nobody has ever done this to Zim... comforted Zim... like you are."

"I care about you. I want to make you happy again."

"But, we are no longer in this 'friendship,' Dib-shit."

I shook my head. "Only if you want it that way..."

"I-" he cut himself off, and paused for a moment or so. "This... 'friendship'... does it involve these 'hugs?'"

I nodded, smiling a little.

"Do you want it again, Dib-stink?"

I nodded again. "If I didn't, I wouldn't be here with you right now, telling you how much I care about you and not leaving you to self-destruct."

I thought I saw a small change in his demeanor when I said that. Almost like a glimmer of hope. I must have gotten through to him, because for the first time ever, he smiled at me.

I smiled back.

Zim sat in my lap again, resting his head against my chest. I felt a small wave of happiness flood through me at the move. I enjoyed it not because I liked him, but because perhaps he was finally opening up to me.

"You changed my life by coming here Zim. If anything, I'm glad that Earth just happen to be here despite the Tallest tried to get rid of you. If you weren't here, I think I'd most likely have given up."

"What do you mean?" I heard him ask.

I ran my fingers along his antennae again. I felt him shudder a little.

"Well... I was jeered and picked on before you came here Zim. Nobody wanted to be my friend. I was just labelled as insane and weird by the other kids. My father couldn't care less about me, nor could Gaz. My belief in the paranormal was what kept me strong. My mother told me before she died to never give up on in what I believed in. I always believed in aliens, no matter how much people told me I was crazy. I had wished for something to happen. And it did, Zim. You came along and changed my life."

Zim was quiet beneath me.

"You have no idea how hard it was for me when mum was gone. I had to raise Gaz and look after her. I had to act like a parent because my dad was too busy for us. I had nothing, Zim. Only myself. And my beliefs. You were like...hmm... kinda like a light in the darkness."

Zim's right antenna twitched, and I felt it hit me on the mouth. I swallowed a little, wondering what his reaction to that would be.

"Zim... saved you?"

"In a way, yes." I leaned over and looked at him. He turned his head slightly to look back at me.

"I have never been appreciated like that before, Dib-friend. It is a nice feeling. I have had nothing but hyoomans and Irkens laughing at me."

"Same here. Though I can't say Irken's because I only know you. Well, unless you count Tak."

Zim gagged. "That horrible female..."

I had no reason to argue there.

"Well Dib-friend, I have to say. You have made me feel much better. Not so... worthlessness."

"Worthless?"

"Yes, yes." he waved his hand at me, but I could see him smiling.

"You never were Zim. Not to me, anyway."

He continued to smile at me.

"For a hyooman, perhaps you are not so bad yourself, Dib-friend."

I smiled back at him, before reaching up to hold a hand to his cheek. He jerked his head slightly, but allowed me to do so.

He frowned at me for a moment, as if curious. His antennae went back a little further.

"Why do you do this?"

"Because I like you, Zim."

"Like? How so?"

I looked away, feeling my face go a little red.

"Well... I... just like you."

"I like you too, Dib-friend." he replied, and I felt my heart leap a little.

"R-really?"

"Well... yes, isn't that what friendship is? Liking each other?"

I nodded. "Yeah... but, what kind of like Zim?"

"There are different kinds of like?" he responded, raising a non-existent eyebrow at me. Typical Zim.

"Yeah... I guess..."

"What are they?"

I sighed. "Well... there is like like... as in you just... like somebody... and there is love like... which is when you like somebody a bit more than like."

"Eh...?"

I sighed again. "Love and like are two different things. If you just like somebody, then you just like them... like a friend. You are friends with them. But if you like somebody a bit more... then you love them. You like them as more than a friend. You have feelings for them."

He was quiet for a few moments, and I started to smile thinking he understood.

"...Eh...?"

I slapped my palm to my forehead. "Zim! I... ugh. There is only two kinds of like. One is like like! You are just friends with somebody. The other is love like, you like them MORE than a friend!"

More silence.

"Eh...?"

I let out a frustrated groan, and before I could stop myself, I turned his head and planted my lips to his. I felt him lock up, as he went into shock. I think I went into shock myself. I pulled away from him, looking away.

"I... Zim..."

He reached up to his mouth, before looking up to me, his eyes wide.

"D-Dib?"

"I..."

He frowned at me, and I felt my heart sink a little as a strange look crossed his face. Why did I do something so stupid...

"What kind of like was that?"

I felt like slapping him. Instead I just softly replied to him.

"Love like."

"You love like Zim?"

I snorted for a moment or so at how that sounded. "Yeah... do you love like me?"

"I have... never experienced this 'love' before. Irkens cannot love. Tak was... a test. But... perhaps that's why..."

"Why?" I asked.

"Why my squeedily-spooch hurts around you."

I smiled. Perhaps... I had a chance. But... despite that, I didn't want to rush into anything with the alien. We'd only just become friends.

"Look Zim... I'm sorry about today... about what happened to you..."

"No need to apologuys, Dib-friend."

"Apologize."

"Yes, yes, I know!"

"Well... now you know how I feel about you, space-boy. I want... us to be friends... have fun... what do you think?"

Zim gave me strange look, before he nodded.

"Yes... I think I could get used to this 'friendshippy-ness.'" He grinned at me.

I grinned back at him, and that was when I noticed something I'd nearly failed to realize.

Zim wasn't crying anymore.


	17. A Different Way To Live

**A/n:**

First, to all of my reviewers -

**Captor of the Crazies:** Lol, try not to explode on me XD  
**Ellara:** He's a jerk, isn't he?  
**DysprosiumOxide:** Kinda terrible ^^; And thank you ^^ I look forward to seeing it! :D  
**PepperLovey:** ^^  
**Ake:** Thank you I'm glad you are enjoying it.  
**YaoiGirly:** I'm sorry  
**M00-M00:** Aww, I'm sorry And thank you!  
**ToRRiS:** Aw, glad you liked that part. I thought it would be cute to show Dib that Zim cares in some way. He never knew Zim had that picture there. Zim used to cover it with his back when at his locker so that Dib never knew it was on there.  
**Savetheelephantnow:** Aw, thank you very much ^^ And please don't explode!  
**Nat Kicker of Shins:** O.O XDD  
**Ray Anthony 4eva: **No, I don't like emo Zim sorry. He will remain upset though for a little while. Dib will help him through it.  
**YourZombieStalker:** Lol. XD Dib would be doing that in front of his computer ;D  
**PinkKitty1:** Awesome :D**  
SpyroForLife:** I'm glad you're enjoying it so far :D And it's good to see you on as well We need to RP again sometime, if you want to still.  
**Burnnoticegirl30157:** Will do  
**Haru101:** Thank you!  
**NeglectSummerazure:** Thank you :D  
**A Very in:** Be patient. .  
**yurithefurry:** . thanks :D  
**ZimDulce13:** You should know now ^^  
**FaylinnRain:** Thank you ^^  
**TwoCute:** Thank you ^^ And thank you for the reviews.  
**Ale:** I'm fine, just have been busy with University.  
**Spottedwave From Irk:** Uh, thanks. ^^  
**TilasTrinity:** Thank you ^^  
**MusicInxMind:** Thank you ^^ Glad it did.  
**Juices of Mooses/Mooses of Juices:** Jhonen, you just died in my arms tonight! It must have been the mouse/moose you ate, I wanted to walk away. I don't have a work to cry at, but my hands cry and the work I make them do. A good helping of mouse/moose to you. *takes off hat to you***  
ShubbaBANG:**Thank you

Thank you for all the kind reviews. Now, back to the story ^^

* * *

**Chapter 17**

Zim's P.O.V

A few hours had passed since that final transmission from my... ex-Tallest. I was still having a bit of trouble comprehending whether it had really happened or not. But one way or another I would never be returning home. I knew I made mistakes, but I had never expected the Tallest to banish me from my own people. It wasn't fair. I didn't care what they thought of me anymore now. My human friend was right about one thing - I didn't need them. Not only because he had drilled that into my head, but because I was starting to see my leaders in a new shiny light. Nothing mattered to them after all. They hadn't even cared if I had died or not. According to them I was supposed to die anyway, not land on this planet. I had been lucky that Earth had been there.

In a small way, I was happy that I'd been banished here. At least the planet was decent and not disgusting and slimy like planet Mork. I'd much rather spend the rest of my days on this watery rock than living among the stench of rottingness on a planet like that one. At least here one human cared about me to make sure I didn't self destruct myself. One human, out of all the brain-dead stink monsters on this pitiful planet, wanted to stay with me after that stupid transmission and make sure I didn't do anything stupid. That same one person said that he'd rather looking after me to fame and monies.

In someway that make my squeedily-spooch churn. But in a good way.

The Dib had never shown me any sort of emotions or compassion before. But something had changed him ever since that day I fell over and cut open my head. Maybe he actually had realised then that I did have these 'emotions' that he possessed inside of me. Or maybe he had realised when I had started to cry in front of him. I hadn't wanted to... and I couldn't believe I had let myself sink to that level, but I was glad it was in front of him and not some other human. Like that Elliot-teacher man... thing. He would no doubt have questioned me crying, and would probably have never let me see the end of it. He was already suspicious enough of me as it was. Dib had known me since I got here. I had met him the day after I'd set up my base. He'd been the only human in the class that had somehow seen right through my disguise. He'd even drawn a diagram of me up on the board. I was still working out how he'd known about my mission before I had even told him, or said anything. As that thought passed through my mind, I looked at him.

He was sitting on the couch staring at the television. GIR was home and was watching some show. Dib had sat beside him before and started watching it. I have no idea why, but he seemed to be enjoying it.

"...So, it was that guy after all..."

I looked up, thinking he was addressing me, but he was looking at the television. When the adverts came on, I realised that the show was that one he liked called 'Mysterious Mysteries of Strange Mystery.'

I wasn't on the couch myself, but was sitting on the floor in front of it, a blanket around me. GIR had instantly picked up on my mood when he'd gotten home and got it for me. In some strange way, my SIR unit actually cared about me. I was glad for that. It did help reduce the amount of headaches I'd had when we first moved in here. GIR and I had grown rather close over the past three years and now I considered the robot almost like a little brother. That stupid moose was sitting on the armrest, squeaking occasionally.

I'd stopped crying a while ago, but there was still pain in my squeedily-spooch. It was going to take me a while to recover from this, but I was happy that the Dib-friend had promised to help me get over what had happened. If it weren't for him, I'd have nobody. Well, I' have GIR and that stupid moose, but they wouldn't have understood what I was feeling as well as the Dib.

I looked at the human again. He had a finger to his mouth as he contemplated on 'that guy after all.' After a moment or so he looked at me.

"Zim? You okay?"

I stared back at him for moment. I perked my antennae a little, and that caught his attention.

"Dib, I need to ask you something."

Dib had his full attention on me now. "What is it?" He looked at me expectantly as he waited for my response. I saw one of his feets twitch.

"How did you know about Zim before Zim even relayed his mission?"

"Huh?" he raised an eyebrow at me and I sighed.

"When Zim started, at that smelly skool. You knew, what I was. You knew what I was doing. How?"

Dib stared at me for a while longer, turning his head slightly as he remembered back. I wondered if his primitive human brains would remember back that far, but a slight nod of confirmation from him told me that he did.

"I heard you."

"Eh? What do you mean?" Now I was the one confused.

"I heard you, Zim. Over a transmission. Six months earlier. Heard something about an 'Operation Impending Doom Two' and that the 'universe would be ours for the taking,' or something like that. I heard your leaders assign Irkens to planets. But that was it, really. Then when you came into our classroom that day, I knew you were an alien cuz of your skin. And the fact you had no nose or ears. And three fingers."

Dib looked at me intently, gesturing with his fingers to emphasize his sentences. I swallowed a little before drawing in a small breath.

"You heard the Tallest assign me to a secret mission?"

Dib nodded. "For six months I wondered if and when an alien would show up. I was starting to give up, thinking it might be a hoax, but that very next day you came into the classroom. I knew then it wasn't a hoax."

"But... I do not understand, Dib-friend. How were you the only hyooman able to identify my superior form? Out of all those other brainless meat-childs?"

Dib shrugged. "Everyone is just stupid. They only see what is in front of them. I see past that."

"You knew instantly Zim was an alien?"

"Yeah, Zim. It's not that hard to figure out."

I frowned a little. "But... it's a flawless disguise!"

Dib snorted. "What, a wig and a pair of contacts? I have to give you credit though Zim, you've kept an entire city fooled for the past five years because of them."

I smirked. "Ha, you see? Zim's disguise is perfect!"

"Maybe so, but it's been the same for five years."

"Eh?"

"Never mind."

I wondered what he meant by that, but just shrugged it off. GIR changed the channel at that moment, but Dib no longer seemed interested in that show he was watching. Instead, he slid down onto the floor beside me. I stared at him.

"Hey Zim... I have a question for you."

I continued to look at him, and he took it that he had my attention. He reached up and pulled away the blanket from me, before knocking on my PAK with his fist. I cringed a little.

"What are you doing?" I asked him.

"What is this thing? I've seen you wear it since you got here. Have you ever taken it off? Is it like some kind of weird alien backpack? And how come you even wear it in the gym? Wouldn't it get broken? And it's weird how it just sits on your back like that. Where are the handles?"

He said all this very fast.

I sat dumbfounded for a moment or so as I tried to process all that he asked. He stared at me eagerly, like the curious probing human he was.

"It's my PAK."

"PAK? What's a PAK?" he grinned.

"It's my life support. It keeps me alive."

I don't think Dib had been expecting that for an answer. He looked at me, shocked. His jaw slacked a little. If it weren't for the situation I was in, I would have laughed at him.

"Wait... keeps you ALIVE? Like... like a resuscitator? Why? Are you sick?"

I shook my head. "Every Irken has a PAK fitted when they are born, (when I mentioned born, he looked very intrigued) and then the control brains zap the Irken's to life. The PAK is like our brains. It stores our information and status in the Empire."

"So... that metal thing on your back is your brain?"

I shook my head. "My brain is in here," I pointed to my head. "Like yours... but my PAK is a live feed. It updates me on things. Kinda like a second brain, but a dominate one. It holds me in it. My PAK is me."

Dib raised an eyebrow at me. "You...?"

I nodded. "Without the PAK, Zim would not be Zim."

"So you're Zim cuz of your PAK?"

I nodded. "If Zim were to not have the PAK, he would get stupider. My body is like a shell."

Dib looked fascinated. He had that weird look he got on his face when he found out new information about something he loved. I'd seen him with that look when he got talking about something and wouldn't shut up about it.

"Can you take it off?"

I nodded. "Yes, but without it I would die after ten minutes."

"Die?" he looked shocked again.

I nodded. "Yeah. It is an important part of Zim."

"So... you're basically controlled by that PAK of yours? By... what? That control brain thing?"

Zim nodded. "Yes, but as Zim is defective... I am different. A different Irken. I do not obey it the way other Irkens do. "

"What do you mean?"

"Zim acts how he feels is correct. Which is why I am the best, Dib-friend." I grinned at him.

Dib just shook his head slightly. "Don't you worry about it though? I mean... that thing could easily get damaged, right?"

I shook my head, scoffing. "It is Irken technology, Dib. Far more superior to your hyooman technologies. It is linked to me by a genetic bond. My PAK would know where I am no matter where I go without it attached to my body shell."

"So what, it would find you?"

I nodded. "It is also useful. It contains stuff... handy to Zim."

"Like those long leg like things?"

I nodded. "Yes, Zim controls those."

Dib looked a bit envious. "You have extra limbs?"

"Yes, because I am superior like that."

Dib growled a little, but let it go. He knew I was right, as usual. Victory!

After a moment or so, he looked at me again. "How does it stay on your back?"

"Cables."

"Cables? I don't see any cables. Where are they?" he replied, looking at my back.

"Behind the PAK. They go into my spine."

"S-spine? Inside of you?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

He looked a bit disgusted. "Doesn't that hurt?"

I shook my head.

The human stared at my PAK before looking to me again. There was just silence between us, which was interrupted when GIR leapt from the couch squealing something about melted cheese, and ran for the front door. Minimoose squeaked at us and went after him. The door shut after them and we were left with silence. The TV had turned itself off, so it was just me and the human.

"So uh..."

I shifted a little, and Dib put an arm to the back of his head.

"You know, tomorrow is Halloween Zim. They want us to dress up. As something."

"Eh..? Halloween?"

He nodded. "I was thinking of going as a werewolf... or an alien. I don't want to... trust me, but they said we'd be sent to the underground classroom if we didn't."

"Zim has to... dress up?"

He nodded, before smirking. "Or, maybe not. Go as yourself."

I glared at him. "No way!"

"Aw, come on Zim! You know how stupid people are! Everybody will think it's a costume!"

"NO! Stupid hyooman! Have you the brain worms?"

Dib-friend just rolled his eyes. "Well... I need to head home Zim. Just be sure you go as something. I'm sure you don't want to go to the UC for the rest of the year. They have rats down there."

I shuddered. He was right, I didn't.

Dib stared at me again, as he stood up to leave. I stood up beside him, staring back. He did that a lot... stared at me. Before I could open my mouth to ask him to stop, he ran foward and pulled me into that 'hug' thing again. I tensed up, but relaxed a little. I could feel him holding me close... my body against his. For a moment I thought felt something weird, but Dib pulled away before I had a chance to wonder what it might be.

"I-I'll see you tomorrow, Zim."

He looked at me, before turning and opening up the front door. I watched him closely. He eyed me one last time as the door shut behind him and he was gone. I stood for a moment or so, before turning to head down to the base, hoping GIR and Minimoose would get back soon. They knew I shut down the house after dark... for safety reasons mainly. In the past I'd had a few earth childs sneak past security and actually get into my home. I didn't want that to happen again.

As I descended to my labs, I pondered about this Halloween thing that would be taking place tomorrow. I'd never 'dressed up' before, but I knew it involved wearing some kind of strange outfit. I'd seen the other pig smellies do it at skool. I wondered what I could possibly dress up as. Dib was probably right in that I could just go as my true self and nobody would notice, but still, I didn't want to take that risk. After all, Dib wasn't the only smart human on the planet... well, so I thought. Surely there had to be other humans out there that could tell I wasn't one of them, even if it was Halloween.

I shuddered. Pushing that thought aside for a moment, I sat down in front of my computer.

"Computer!"

"Whhhaaaaaattttttttttt." It droned at me, in its usual bored tone.

"Show me examples of these... Halloween dress up costume... things."

"Ugh. Fine."

A few moments later, multiple images flashed across the screen of different costumes. None of them intrigued yet alone interested me. I was about to turn off the screen when one costume caught my eye.

I grinned.

Tomorrow... would be an interesting day.


	18. A New Perspective

**A/n:**

Lol. I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. Some mild swearing... and a massive turn on for Dib, but you'll see why XD

No denying it now, Dib. YOU'RE GAY! YAYYY XD Things are heating up.

But as I said, no rush XD

Btw, UC stands for Underground Classroom.

* * *

**Chapter 18**

Dib's P.O.V

As I sat at my desk the next morning at skool, I wondered if Zim had actually listened to me or not last night. I had told him that today was Halloween and that everybody was supposed to dress up, or risk being sent to the UC for the rest of the year. As I had predicted, everybody was in costume. A lot of the kids (or should I say, teens) still enjoyed such a stupid day. How they could still enjoy it was beyond me. Most of the girls in my class and grade took the opportunity to dress up like sluts in those skimpy nurse outfits. It made me sick.

I had gone with my gut instinct this year. I reached up to my head and pulled down the fake antennae, feeling them spring back up. Yep, I'd gone as an alien. It was stupid... perhaps lame, but I'd done it anyway. A few students had laughed at my costume, but I'd felt better when I saw Zita dressed as some slutty looking female alien. At least I wasn't the only alien this year. She had this mini purple skirt on with a lycra purple top and pink sleeves with gloves. On her head were bouncy antennae like mine, but hers looked ridiculous. They were kind of jagged at the tips, with feathers sticking out of them. If she was after attention, she got it. Some of the guys were drooling at the sight of her.

I gagged and turned my mp3 player up louder so I wouldn't have to listen to them. I stared at my costume as I rested my head into my hand on the desk. I was wearing a green and black striped pull-over. I'd added a fake collar and sleeves, similar to that of what Zim wore. I had my usual black pants and boots on. Besides the fake antennae, I didn't go to much effort. I would have liked to go as a werewolf but I'd realised that my father had tossed away that costume a few years back. Still desperate for me to give up my 'paranormal delusions' and study real science. Screw that.

I was happy, and that was all that mattered to me. I was happier now that Zim and I were closer. Well... not exactly closer, but the friendship was definitely there now. I hoped we'd get closer though...

Torque entered that classroom at that moment with his bimbo. The blonde was dressed as a cheerleader, and he was dressed as a pro-athlete. As they walked past me, he grabbed one of the fake antennae on my head, and pulled it right back. He let go and it flicked and hit me in the head.

FUCK. It stang as it hit against my skin.

"Damn it, don't do that!" I spat at him.

"What's that Diblet? I didn't quite catch that."

He pulled at it again, causing it to flick into my eye this time.

"FUCK!" I shouted, standing up and holding my eye. "Leave me alone!"

I thought he was going to punch me again at that, but instead he just laughed and headed over to his friends towards the back of the classroom. A few of the other students laughed at me as I sat back down, holding onto my eye. I ignored them, putting in my mp3 again. It had been knocked out when I'd stood up. I clenched my fist and slammed it into my desk.

Damn I hated this skool. I hated everybody in it.

The best I could do was ignore them and wait for the pain to settle, which thankfully didn't take too long. I was able to open my eye again after a short while. I looked down to my mp3 to change the song I was listening to, when suddenly background noise around me stopped. I looked up for a moment wondering why, and pulling out my earphones, when I realised what had shut them up.

I joined their stares as they looked towards the student standing in the door way. My jaw dropped slightly and I felt my face grow a little hot. I knew nobody else would be having the same reaction as me. I was obviously the only apparent gay one.

Zim stepped into the classroom. My eyes travelled down his body.

He was in a... skin-tight... red pull over. It had no sleeves, so his pale jade-green arms hung loose by his sides. He wasn't wearing his gloves. On the front was a small patch with an evil smiley face. He had his usual disguise on, but he'd pulled down some of the front of his hair so that it covered his forehead. I squirmed a little in my seat as my eyes came across two white devil horns sitting on top of his head. They gleamed a little as he proceeded into the classroom. I felt my face get a little hotter as he passed me to head to his seat. Like the red pullover, he had black skin-tight pants on. He wasn't wearing any shoes that I could see, but after a moment or so I realised that the shoes were a part of the pants. They were all-in-one. I eyed his hips. He had curves. Not enough to be feminine, but they were there for sure. His hips jutted slightly. My eyes travelled around to his backside, and I bit my lip. It looked so... damn perfect. Especially in those tight-pants. His ass was perfection. A red devil's tail trailed from the back of his pants and dragged along the ground limply behind him. As much as didn't want to deny myself of it, I felt flustered. Zim was making me flustered.

He was making me flustered because HE LOOKED FUCKING HOT.

He looked hotter than hot. He was stunning!... oh God.

I was thankful that my uniform covered up the front of my pants, because I could feel...

He was turning me on. Oh sweet mercury was he turning me on. I wanted to run across the room and knock him to the ground, smothering him and planting my mouth all over that smooth, flawless green skin. I wanted to feel that perfect body beneath me. I wanted him. I wanted him, badly. I wanted him like nothing I'd ever wanted before.

There was no way I could deny myself of it now. I was gay. I was friggin gay, but... I didn't care! Deep down I knew I just had to have been. I had never had any interest in girls, I'd never been into the stuff that the other guys were into... I'd kept to myself and my studies... and I'd only ever thought about Zim. The past five years he'd been the only thing that dominated my mind. So what if he was an alien? I didn't care how much of a xenophile I was, but Zim was the only thing I'd truly ever wanted! He'd been the one thing that had motivated me, inspired me... made me feel like I was worth something. Like I had something to fight for.

Zim had been the main reason I was still here today. That I hadn't given in and gone up to join my mother.

A devil. Out of all the costumes he could have chosen, he came as a devil. I just had to give him credit! It was so... fitting! Not only that, it made him sexy!

The chatter had started up once again in the classroom. Some of the students had laughed at his costume, but none of them seemed to care less about it. I guessed it was because this was the first time the alien had ever come in something that wasn't his uniform (well, he had come in his gym uniform, but that was the only thing). For me it was another story. I was having a very hard time trying not to look across the classroom and stare. I could see him slipping into his seat out the corner of my eye. He didn't have a cape on, but the collar around his neck really emphasized his badassness.

The teacher came into the classroom at that moment, distracting me for a brief moment from Zim. I felt so stupid in my alien costume. Zim's costume was by far the best in the classroom... well, in my opinion it was. Everybody else would probably say that Torque's costume was the best. Or The Letter M's, who had gone as a...squid? What the hell?

I shook my head as I packed away my mp3 to start the lesson. Maths. Ugh... I hated maths. I was good at it, but I hated it. It was so boring, and most of it I already knew thanks to my father. That was the one advantage of having a genius for a father... I was somewhat a genius myself, but I didn't like to brag about it. I was the smartest student in the grade, and my grades proved this. I knew Zim was smarter than me though. By years. Hundreds of them.

The lesson dragged on and I kept my eyes to my desk and not towards Zim or his perfect ass. It was like hell for me to be honest. Like when you want something so bad but it's just out of your reach. I wanted the lesson to end, but there was still fifteen minutes to go. It was not only painful, but it was embarrassing. Some of the students had picked up on my strange behaviour and were staring at me. I bit my lip again and focused on my school work. Finally... FINALLY, fifteen minutes passed and the bell rang. The next class before recess break was Religion. Bludge class. Still trying to avoid Zim, I packed up my books and put them into my bookbag. If I was quick, maybe I could avoid him and get to the next class before him. I turned to make a dash for it, but I felt a small hand tap me on the shoulder. Crap... I was going to get hard... and he would see. Damn... DAMN IT!

I gritted my teeth as I turned.

"Hello Dib-friend!" he spoke, looking at me, with his head slightly tilted to the left.

"H-hi... Z-Zim!" I stuttered out, grinning stupidly.

"Hm..." he raised a finger to his mouth. "So... you have dressed as me... Dib-hyooman?"

"What?"

"You have dressed as Zim?"

Oh. OHHH.

"An alien... y-yeah... me." I grinned again.

He seemed satisfied. "Zim... CONSIDERED going as an alien... but, I liked this costume better."

So did I. It turned me on.

"Uh... yeah... it's looks... good... r-really good, Zim."

He picked up on my odd behaviour, and stepped a little closer.

"Everything alright with you, Dib-friend?" he raised the ridge of his eye at me in a typical Zim expression. His closeness didn't help. Any closer he'd feel more than my books pressing against him.

"Uh... yeah! I'm great!" I told him, trying to back away. He followed me.

I mentally swore. Not now... out of all the times, why now?

"Hey look! Dib's desperate for Zim!"

"Guh..." I groaned, looking towards the source of the voice. Zim did as well.

Fucking Torque.

"Ya gay faggot, Dib! Ha ha." He walked over to me and flicked the antennae on my head again. I sneered.

He turned his attention to Zim. Zim glared at him.

"So what's this... a devil? You wear that to impress ya boyfriend, Zim?"

"I don't know what you're talking about!" Zim snapped.

"The costume... I mean... it's not exactly... a bad fit, if you know what I mean." Torque winked at him.

Zim looked at him as if he had two heads.

"Why do you close one eye? Does it irritate you?"

"Huh?" that took Torque off guard.

"Irritate! Like, hurty! I MEAN HURT... does it, bother you, hyooman?"

Torque just shook his head. "You're such an idiot!"

"DO NOT INSULT ZIM!" Zim roared at him.

Torque sneered and picked the alien up by the scruff of his neck. He slammed him into a the wall behind us.

"Zim!" I cried out.

Torque put his fist into Zim's face. Zim watched him, no expression on his face. But by looking at him, I could tell he was nervous. His wig and been knocked aside.

"Listen, ya green fag! I do the yelling around here! Unless you want this in ya mouth, I suggest ya keep it shut!"

The idiot dropped Zim, and he slid to the ground. The bimbo clung to him and they walked away, laughing. A small crowd had gathered around us and they followed, most of the students jeering us and laughing as they walked away. I glared after them, before bending down to help Zim up.

"Are you okay?"

He pulled himself away from me. "I am fine."

I sighed. I knew he hated being bullied as much as I did. I reached to his head and went to fix his wig, but he jerked back a little.

"ZIM CAN DO IT!"

In that costume he sure could.

UGH.

"Shut up brain!" I yelled, and slapped myself on the head at that thought. Zim gave me one of the most oddest looks I'd ever seen.

"Uh... are you sure?" I asked him. "I know you were kinda scared Zim..."

"YOU'RE LYING!"

"What? Why would I lie about-"

"YOU'RE LYING!"

UGH. I just shook my head.

"Zim, he called me a fag too..."

Zim just sighed, fixing his wig. He stared at me and I stared back at him.

"Come on... we'll be late..."

He nodded at me, and proceeded ahead of me, holding his books close to his chest. I picked up my backpack and followed him, unable to take my eyes off his ass.

I wondered how long I'd last until recess.

Because by now I wasn't even sure I could wait any longer to tell the alien how I had started to truly feel about him.

I was gay.

And, I was falling in love with Zim.

**End note: **If you want an idea of what Zim looks like in that costume, you can see on my deviantArt. XD


	19. A Not A Date

**A/n:**

Yay, time for their first not-a-date! (As so David says to Nani in Stitch! The Movie XD)

Sorry for the short chapter... but the next one, will be a good one. I promise! 

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**Chapter 19**

Dib's P.O.V

Mr. Elliot called Zim out during Religion.

I had been busy trying to keep my eyes averted from the alien's ass when there came a knock on the door, and he had simply entered, requesting to speak to Zim. I felt my heart start to pound. What the hell did he want now?

Zim's gaze crossed mine as he left the classroom with the teacher and I started to get anxious when he didn't return for another ten minutes. I was about to ask if I could use the restrooms when had Zim finally stepped back inside. He was holding something, but I didn't have much of a chance to see what it was when he slid it into his PAK. I swallowed some spit at the back of my throat. Surely this had nothing to do with what had happened in the halls yesterday? I hoped not...

The bell finally rang for class to end, and I leaped out of my seat to rush to the alien's side. He stared at me as I approached.

"Zim, what did he give you?"

Zim looked at me for a moment, and I saw a slight change in his demeanor.

"A letter."

"Can I see?"

He looked at me for a moment, before reaching into his PAK and pulling out the white folded paper I'd seen him with earlier. He handed it to me.

It was a letter addressed to his guardians and it was about Zim being... harassed? It also said that Elliot wanted a meeting with Zim's parents, to talk about his welfare at the skool. I groaned. I knew the teacher meant well, but Zim really didn't need this. I handed him back the letter and he put it back into his PAK.

"Are you going to go, Zim?"

"Well, I have no choice, do I? I can't say no. Then he'd think I'm weird. I need to blend in at this pathetic skool, not stick out like a sore plum."

"Thumb."

He scowled at me, but sighed, starting to stand up. My eyes were instantly drawn to his ass again. To my horror, he noticed.

"Dib?"

I jumped a little, and gave him a sheepish grin. He frowned.

"Why do you stare at ZIM?"

"Uh... let's go. The bell went."

Crap.

Zim seemed to shrug off whatever he was thinking about and picked up his books. I left the classroom with him following behind me. I couldn't tell what he might've been thinking at that moment, let alone how he would react if I confessed that I was starting to love him. I wanted him more than a friend. My heart desired that, but I had no idea if he'd accept me or not.

I would be crushed if he didn't. It had taken me this long to work out my feelings and my orientation. I didn't want that to go to waste nor did I want to just jump in and ruin something before it had a chance to begin. But it was getting harder and I wasn't sure how much more I could take.

I'd kissed Zim before... brief, but it was a kiss none-the-less.

I took a moment to think to myself as I approached my locker and opened it.

But I had to remember that Zim was an alien. I had no idea how he felt about emotions or affection. There was no way for me to know if he even knew what they were. Zim had a very... child like attitude most of the time. Not to mention, he was quite dense. But that didn't mean he was completely dumb. I knew just how smart he was. He'd been tense the times I'd recently hugged him. But... perhaps that was just because he hadn't expected me to do that. Well, obviously. I doubt the Irken ever had anybody show affection to him before.

I sighed, as I shoved my books away into my locker and claimed my recess. Hesitating a little, I turned to watch Zim pack his books away. I gazed at his slender form, reaching up to the locker that was almost half a head taller than he was. He was just so... perfect. Curves in all the right places... and his costume really emphasized that. Since his standard uniform was shaggy, it covered his hips and thighs and I'd never been aware he'd possessed such a... nice figure. When I'd found him in his gym shorts I'd seen his naked top half, but I wasn't paying too much attention to his figure. I was too busy staring intrigued at his skin. It was so... flawless. I was envious.

A few scars riddled my chest and stomach. I had a few stretch marks across my legs from all the climbing and rough-housing I used to do as a child. Most of those scars were from fights with Zim. I hated my body. It was so flawed... imperfect. I'd cringe every time I looked in the mirror at my super pale form. I couldn't tan... I was born pale. I didn't mind that though. I didn't care for good looks as much as the other guys did. But... I did want to look nice... for Zim... if he ever were to... well.

I sighed again.

I didn't look after myself as much as I should have. I had been busy raising Gaz that I'd neglected my body. After Zim had come along, it had got worse. I didn't eat as much as I should have. I was feeble and thin. Not as thin as Zim, but still fairly thin. I was underweight. I was light. No wonder Torque picked on me so much. Not only was I gay, I was like a toothpick. An easy target.

I jerked myself out of my thoughts and closed my locker, before facing Zim yet again. He was waiting for me by his locker. I smiled as I approached him, and he returned it, after a moment or hesitation.

"Loser's spot?"

He gave a brief nod.

We made our way out to the skool yard, and sat down by the tree there. Our tree.

Zim sat with his back to the tree, while I sat facing him with my back against the bench I usually sat on. It was uncomfortable for me, but I didn't complain. I was just so happy that Zim and I were finally friends.

Thankfully my lust seemed to have settled... for now. That was a relief, because my pants had started to hurt me.

"So... uh, Zim?"

He looked at me.

"How are you feeling now? After yesterday?"

He shrugged. "You were right, Dib-friend. Zim did not need that stupid Empire."

I gave a small smile. "Good. I'm glad you think that," I replied, taking a bite out of my apple. "So, what made you come as a devil?"

He smirked. "It was the only decent costume-thing."

He was right about that.

"I see."

He tilted his head at me, and opened his mouth slightly as if to ask something, but paused. He continued a moment or so later.

"Why did you dress that way?"

I shrugged. "Easy to put together. And you know I've always liked aliens."

He nodded.

"What was the real reason you didn't go as yourself, Zim?" I continued.

He sighed. "Some hyoomans are smart, Dib, even though most of them are stupid. Zim was not going to risk being exposed."

"Yeah... I guess."

He frowned. "You were EXPECTING Zim to be his true self, were you not?"

"Well... kinda." I took another bite of my apple.

He 'hmphed' at me and crossed his arms. I grinned.

"You look better the other way... you know" I spoke softly.

"Of course I do!"

I rolled my eyes a little, taking another bite. He watched me curiously but said nothing to me. We sat in silence for a while. During that time he took the tail into his lap and played around with it. I fiddled around with the fake antennae. He looked up at this, and watched.

For a moment or so I wondered what crossed his mind as he watched me flick them. Perhaps he was thinking about how he actually had them. Or perhaps he was trying to work out why I was doing that. When he asked why I was doing that, I got my answer.

"I dunno... I'm bored."

"So is Zim. Very bored."

"Uh... well... when skool is over, why don't we... do something?" I chanced.

That caught his attention, and he flicked the tail out of his lap. "Eh?"

I swallowed. I hoped he wouldn't reject that offer. "We could... go catch a movie... or go to Bloaty's."

"Do... friends usually do this?"

I smiled. "Yeah, all the time."

"Then Zim is happy to do this... 'movie catching' and 'go to-ing ' with you."

"I... we- great!" I grinned. I felt my happiness meter scooting up a notch. I wondered for a moment if those places would be open or not, but figuring it was Halloween they most likely would be for extra business.

I couldn't believe he said yes. I couldn't believe I was going to Bloaty's and the movies with him. I'd been a little nervous to ask, but I'd felt that go away almost instantly when he'd said yes. This was a great start. Hopefully I could get closer to the alien. I longed to know how he was feeling about me and the only way I could find out for sure was to spend more time with him.

I wanted nothing more than to build up on his trust. Prove to him that I was a friend... that I could be somebody that would be there for him. That he had changed my life, despite all that crap I'd pulled on him recently. I felt a little tension from him still. It was obvious from the way he hesitated when answering me. He'd done that a few times. Hopefully the more time we spend together, the more he'd loosen up. I wanted to touch him... but at the same time I didn't want to push it. We'd only just become friends. He knew I'd kissed him, but obviously he had no idea what it meant. He just knew that I 'love-liked' him, which he probably just considered as 'liked more than a friend' and nothing more. I hadn't explained love to him and I was pretty sure he had no idea what that emotion was. He might've, but knowing him, he wouldn't have a full understanding of it.

He'd told me that his squeedily-spooch hurt around me. That was a good sign, wasn't it? Because my heart certainly hurt around him. Perhaps spending time with him would make him realise why that feeling was there and he'd eventually understand what his own heart was telling him. I felt a little giddy at the thought of tonight. After five years, I'd finally be spending time with Zim and we wouldn't be fighting each other or yelling at each other who the superior species was. We'd be spending quality time together and doing the things friends do. The fun things. The things that made you forget about the troubles in your life, even if it was just for a short period of time.

The bell rang a few minutes later, and Zim stood up, distracting me from my thoughts.

"Very well... I shall meet you after skool Dib, and we can proceed with this movie-going and Bloaty-eating."

I nodded. "Okay! I'll meet you right here!"

He gave me a brief nod, and turned to head to class. I followed him, almost feeling the urge to shout out in glee. Instead I just threw my fist into the air a little.

I had the biggest grin on my face as I passed the other students. Some of them gave me odd looks, but I didn't care. I was happy.

I knew Zim and I were just friends... but it was fun to imagine it as something more... after all, hopefully soon Zim and I would be more than just friends.

I couldn't wait for hi-skool to finish.


	20. A Bothersome Feeling

**A/n:**

Onslaught of updates XD Sorry, I just want to get this story done cuz I'm on a roll with it now. About halfway through it now. :) I hope you're all enjoying it.

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**Chapter 20**

Zim's P.O.V

Something strange was going on with the Dib today. I wasn't sure if anybody else noticed, but I did. Whenever I'd look towards him from my seat, he'd instantly turn away and try to hide his face. I caught him staring at me a few times, though whenever I turned to frown at him he'd just look away and act as if nothing happened. It was weird. Even for the human.

I hated this stupid costume. At first I had liked it, but it got itchy as the pathetic day wore on. I wanted my uniform, but I didn't want to go to the UC either. Slaving away with these other stink beasts full of dirt and hair and sweat (ew) was bad enough. I could tell the Dib was quite excited that I had agreed to go on this movie-seeing and pizza-eating adventure with him. I'd never been to either place. Well, I'd been to Bloaty's but that was one time I was following Dib after I had captured him.

I was looking forward to after skool as well.

The day wore on. It was boring, as usual. The only eventful thing about it was when Miss. Sowourz glasses fell off and her eyes caught on fire. Everybody started to scream. I was intrigued. I think Dib was too, but when I looked over to see his reaction I saw him looking... down at something. I'm not sure what it was, but it was something on my body. I had shrugged and let it go.

When the final bell rang, I headed for home room to collect my books. The Elliot-human was stepping out of a classroom and he caught me as I passed him.

"Zim!"

Oh great. I sighed. This stupid human! I wanted to belt him on the head for his persistancyness!

"Yes?" I asked, in the most false good voice I could manage.

"I was hoping I'd catch you. I need to know if your guardians will be coming to the meeting I arranged with you this morning."

"Eh... I'm not sure. They are very busy with their... being busyness."

"Well, no harm in asking Zim. Please do. I need an answer by tomorrow morning so I can arrange it."

"Whatever. Zim shall." I replied, waving my hand at him to go away.

He nodded. "Thank you."

Psh. I gagged after him as he left. Stupid human.

After claiming my books from my locker, I headed outside to wait for Dib by the losers tree. He wasn't there. That was weird. He'd told me to meet him here. I was jolted from my pondering when I heard a loud yell to the side of the skool and rushed around to see what was going on. I dropped my books.

The Dib was on the ground, being kicked in the sides by Torque and Jockstrap. I let out a cry.

"Dib-friend!"

Both Torque and Jockstrap looked up at me, sneering. I sneered back.

"Leave him alone!"

"Aw, is wittle Zimmers gonna save Diblet?"

Torque kicked Dib in the side again and the human cried out in pain.

"No!"

I rushed over to them and picked up Torque by the collar, throwing him aside, before landing a skilful kick to Jockstrap's stomach. The pathetic creatures groaned. Bet they hadn't been expecting that! Even if I was no longer an Invader, I still had my skills and my military training!

I went around to my friend and nudged him on the shoulder, before helping him up.

"Dib-friend, are you alright?"

He coughed a little, and wiped a bit of blood from his mouth. He smiled at me. "Yeah... yeah, I should be."

"Good. Dib-friend I think we sh-"

"Look out Zim!"

I was cut off when I received a kick in the back, causing me to fall forward hard onto the concrete. I let out a moan.

"Like that, did ya?"

The bastard kicked me again. This time, my heart stopped in my squeedily-spooch as I felt my PAK dislodge. It was designed to withstand force, but direct impact alone was enough to make it dislodge. I watched in horror as Torque picked it up, and the stupid human and Jockstrap looked at it.

"Well... well, what's this...?"

"No, give back to Zim!" I cried. I could see my lifeclock start to count down in my field of vision.

Dib had noticed what was going on as well. A look of shock was on his face. He looked at me before looking at the two fools and lunging at them.

"GIVE IT BACK! ZIM WILL DIE WITHOUT IT!" he roared.

They just laughed at him and shoved him to the ground. I tried to push myself up. I succeeded, but my body was like jelly.

"No... no I need... need it!" I cried weakly.

They laughed at me and took off.

"FUCK! Don't worry Zim, I'll get it... I promise..." the human stood up and ran after them.

I could only hope he would. My lifeclock was already down to 9.04.

I collapsed to the ground, panting slightly as my life clock depleted further and further. I could feel my energy draining out of me. At some point a teacher came over to me and helped me up, but I could hardly comprehend what was going on. I didn't know who it was as their face was distorted.

The minutes passed. Dib had still not returned. 4.50.

"PAK...bak...backpak...need..." I tried to speak. I could feel my intelligence start to drain away.

"Zim, w- wrong? What do y-u need? Zim y—h-e to s—up."

"Eryh?" I groaned. "P...ak... Ak... Zim give..."

The teacher answered me, but I couldn't make out what they had said. I could vaguely make out more students crowding around me, but everything was blurry and distorted. 59... 58...

Dib... where are you...? You promised...

I felt darkness enclosing me.

By now my thoughts were hard for me to comprehend. My lifeclock turned red... I was shutting down. It was getting too late. 10... 9...

I could only think about one thing as I started to close my eyes. I took in a last breath, waiting for my lifeclock to stop. 3...2...

But it never did. I felt a shock... like a bolt of lightning had coursed throughout my body. I could feel my energy returning. I was coming back to life. The faces around me became clear and the rushing noise I had been hearing finally subsided. I drew in a deep gasp of oxygen, doing it a few more times as I felt my strength returning. Once I had enough energy to do so, I felt around to my back to feel my PAK back in place. I let out a cry of shock, when I felt a hand on top of mine and looked up to see one face smiling back at me, eyes full of relief and joy. The only face of concern... the only human that cared.

"DIB!" I cried happily. He gave me the biggest grin I'd ever seen. Then he nearly suffocated me in another 'hug.'

"Thank God..." I heard him whisper so that only I could hear. "Thank God... I-I thought it was too late... you were... so s-still..."

"I'll be fine... thank you, Dib-friend..."

"Zim..." was all he could reply, as he held my body close to his. I smiled over his shoulder. Eventually he let me go, and we drew back from each other. He noticed my smile and returned it.

"Come on... let's get out of here."

I nodded. He helped me stand up, as the crowd started to depart. The teacher asked if I was alright, but I just waved my hand at him and he left. It was just the two of us.

"Here... I got these back for you as well."

I watched as he walked over and picked up my books, handing them to me. How he had found the time to do that, I wondered. He must have noticed, because he smiled at me again. "One of the students got them back. He gave them to me when you woke up."

"Oh."

"Come on Zim... let's go..."

I gave a brief nod and a smile, before following Dib out of the hi-skool, and we walked down the street. Filthy human pig smellies grunted at us as we passed. It was getting to be a natural thing. After a short walk, Dib eventually led me to a small box with a single human in it. He turned to me, and pointed to a sign behind her head.

"What movie would you like to see?"

I looked at the list, but couldn't understand what some of the titles meant.

"What's that one? Mutent Alien Prawn from Planet Pipsock."

Dib laughed. "Zim, thats not what it says," he grinned at me. "It says Mutant Alien Spawn from Planet Pillisqwok."

"Yes, yes I know!" I replied, waving my hand at him. He just raised an eyebrow at me.

"We'll see that one then."

Dib turned back to the booth-human before turning back to me a few minutes later with two tickets. He handed one to me. "Come on."

He led me into the complex, and we went into a pair of large doors after handing another human the tickets. I had expected a room full of smelly humans, but instead it was a dark room with a lot of seats, all facing a big screen. The Dib led me up towards the back and we sat down. There was nobody else in the room. Dib seemed to notice this as well.

"I guess everybody is out at Halloween," he grinned at me, flicking his antennae and it bounced around on his head.

"Mm."

"Kinda nice to have it quiet in here for once."

"You've been here before?"

"With Gaz... I didn't want to go, but dad made me. I used to come here with..." he trailed off and I wondered what was wrong with him.

"With?"

He let out a slight sigh. "With my mom. She took me here a lot when I was younger. It was always so noisy that you could hardly hear the movie."

"Oh..." I could sense how he felt. He must have really missed his parental unit.

Both of us were quiet for a while, before I screamed when a loud noise filtered the room and I thought we were under some kind of attack.

"Zim, relax!" Dib laughed. "It's just the movie starting... see?"

I looked to see the giant screen now had moving images on it. The images were being broadcast from a tiny window above us. I stood up and looked into that tiny window, using my PAK legs to get a better view. Dib let out a sharp gasp below me, obviously startled. There was nobody in the little window, only what looked like an ancient projector. Probably advanced to the humans, though. I sat back down beside my friend.

"They are so cool."

"What?"

"Those... legs? How do you control them?"

I stared at him, before pointing to my head. "Easy. Zim just think about them... like my arms or legs."

Dib nodded. "Wow..."

We went quiet again for a while. As the movie began, I noticed Dib kept looking towards me out the corner of my eye. I tried to ignore it, but found myself unable to.

"What are you looking at, hyooman?"

He jumped a little, and looked away. His face went a different colour. "Eh... nothing..."

I pouted a little, but looked back to the movie. Dib did the same. He looked at me a few more times after that, but I did my best to ignore it. I was about to shout at him when he reached around behind me, and pulled me to his side. I wondered why he did that, looking at his hand. He didn't answer me, but focused on the movie. I felt his hand slip under my head covery and graze along my antennae, causing me to shudder a little at the contact. His hand was cold.

He did this for a little while, before looking at me again. I looked back at him, but couldn't bring myself to say anything. Instead, I just let my head rest against his shoulder and we watched the movie. I was just about falling asleep when music jolted me awake and I noticed lots of words scrolling up the screen. The movie had ended. Dib removed his arm from around me and sat up, stretching a little.

"What did you think of that?"

"It was... weird..." I told him, scratching at my lower back a little. "Zim... did not understand half of it."

Dib laughed. "Neither did I actually. But... it was fun."

I smiled. I had no reason to disagree with him. My antennae perked a little when I heard a growly sound and Dib looked at me with a sheepish grin. "I'm hungry. Should we go to Bloaty's?"

"Yeah." I agreed. I couldn't eat any of the gross foods there, but I would get a drink. Over the years I'd developed some immunity to human liquids. I found that I even enjoyed some of them and they had pleasant flavours... much like the ones back on...

I sighed as the thought of my old home planet crossed my mind.

I think Dib noticed my mood drop because he put an arm around me again, much like he had before. "Come on, Bloaty's should be fun." he said enthusiastically, and I smiled at him a little.

We left the smelly movie place and headed for the even smellier place of eating. I half expected to find the Dib-sister there, because I knew that she loved this disgusting place, but as we entered the building she was nowhere to be seen. The Dib and I sat at a table towards the back. While Dib looked at what pizza he wanted, I gazed out of the window. It was starting to get dark and I could see many filthy humans running about in those bizarre costumes they wore. They were carrying those blood candies bags. I hated Halloween... ugh.

Eventually the human decided, and called over a server human, who wrote down what he wanted. I asked for a drink of that clear fizzy stuff. I think they called it 'lemon aid.' Dib watched me as I placed my order with this weird look on his face. I raised an eye-ridge as I stared back at him. He'd been staring at me so much today.

"What...?" I asked, tilting my head.

He seemed to hit himself on the head, leaving me confused.

"Sorry Zim... I uh... I was just wondering if you're having a good time."

I nodded. "Yes, it is nice. This 'friendship.'"

He bit his lower lip a little, before looking away for a moment or so. Something was very obviously on his brains and I wondered what. I frowned.

"What is wrong, Dib-friend? You are uneasiness."

"...Uneasy."

I just looked at him. He sighed.

"Zim... I... I really do like you."

I grinned. "I know! What is not to like about Zim?"

He scoffed a little, but smiled.

A short time later, his stinky pizza came and my drink of lemon-aid was placed in front of me. I took the straw into my mouth and started drinking it. Dib watched me, eating a slice of pizza. His face went a different colour again.

After I had some of my drink, I looked at him eat the pizza, resting my head onto my hand. The cheesy stuff on it stuck to the plate. It made me feel a little ill, but Dib was really enjoying it. I had to lean over the side of the booth, holding my stomach. I heard Dib gasp a little, and thought it was because I wasn't feeling too well, but when I peered behind me at him his face was even darker than before and he had dropped the pizza. It was weird.

"Zim... needs to use the restroom." I told him, standing up and heading for the male restroom. I had no idea if he replied or not, it was too noisy in this stupid building with all of the dirt childs running about. A group of them had entered before with their parental units. They were starting to give me a headache.

There was nobody else in the restroom. I entered a cubicle, holding my stomach, still feeling ill. I sat on the toilet for a moment or so, hoping this sick feeling would pass. I was having a good time and didn't want to just bail out on my new friend.

I wondered why Dib was acting so weird around me today. His face kept changing colour. He kept getting hot... like he was flustered. He hadn't been doing this yesterday. Maybe it was something to do with this stupid costume. Maybe if I took it off he'd stop doing it, but I left my uniform at home this time. I was stuck in it.

The Dib had said he liked me. I had been wondering what he meant by that 'love-like' though. He said it meant 'liked more than a friend,' but that had confused me. More than a friend. What did the more stand for? Humans had such strange ways of communicating. Whatever way Dib was trying to communicate with me, it was making me feel weird. He was filling me with this weirdness. Whatever he was doing, it was rubbing on me.

But then again, he had saved my life today... that was a big move for an Irken, especially when somebody saved his or her life. I was in debt to him for restoring my PAK. I'd almost lost hope, but just before my lifeclock shut itself off he saved me. Out of all the humans, he'd been the one to save me. My PAK couldn't process this because I couldn't. It was confusing. Perhaps this 'more than' had something to do with it. If it did, it would explain his weird behaviour.

I just sat there thinking for a while. He confused me so much. He made me feel so strange inside... he made my squeedily spooch hurt! But why? What did it all mean? And what did this 'more than' and his strange coloured faces have to do with it?

I let out a frustrated growl and made my way back to the human. He perked up as I approached him, giving me a smile, but it turned to disbelief when I pinned him back against the booth.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME? WHY DOES ZIM FEEL THIS WAY?"

"W-what?" he stuttered. "What do you mean...?"

"Whenever I'm around you!" I cried. "I feel weird! You make my squeedily-spooch hurt! And right now it hurts more than ever before! I do not understand it! WHAT DID YOU PUT IN ME?"

"N-nothing! I didn't put anything in you Zim!"

"Then why is your weirdness rubbing off me?"

"I don't know what you mean!" he struggled underneath me.

"Today! Since I wore this stupid halloweenie costume, you've been rubbing me with your weirdness! Your face keeps changing colours! Why?"

His face went that colour again, and I scowled, letting him go. "THERE YOU GO AGAIN!"

"I-I-I don't know Zim! I... I told you, I really like you!"

"But what does that mean?"

"I...I..." he stuttered. He couldn't answer me. I was starting to get fed up. I hated feeling this way. I hated feeling something I didn't understand. It was making my PAK go haywire.

I grabbed my books and started to leave. Dib cried out after me.

"Wait Zim! Please don't go!"

"LEAVE ME ALONE! I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME!"

He stood up to try to catch me, but I ran out of that stupid building. I felt my eyes starting to leak again. My squeedily-spooch hurt worse than before. I punched myself in the stomach.

"Stop hurting Zim!" I yelled at it. It didn't obey me. Stupid organs!

It wasn't fair. This wasn't fair. Why was I feeling this weird feeling?

I ran. I don't know how long for, but I ran. Eventually I tripped as those stupid tears blinded me. I landed hard on the pavement with an 'oof,' and my books flung out in front of me. I sat myself up, wiping at my eyes. When I felt a drop on my head I felt my heart sink. Stupid dirt childs pushed past me with those stupid blood candies bags of theirs. More drops fell and I felt my skin start to burn. My eyes widened. Rain! And I had forgotten to bathe in paste! No!

As fast as I could, I picked up my books and ran under the shelter of a nearby human garage. I had no idea where I was as I hadn't been paying attention to where I was running. As my superior vision soon came back into focus, I glimpsed around. I dropped my books again.

Tak's ship loomed over me.

I had run into Dib's garage.


	21. An Answer Not Quite Expected

**A/n:**

Dib finally owns up.. but how will Zim react? Read on to find out.

This is my final update for tonight... I've done a lot today. 

* * *

******Chapter 21**

Dib's P.O.V

I still couldn't work out what had gone wrong.

One minute we'd been sitting and having fun, then Zim got up to go to the restroom and when he'd come back he yelled in my face about me making him feel weird.

That had confirmed to me that he didn't understand affection or love... but it did hurt. I couldn't help it. I was falling in love with him and he didn't understand why.

So that was why he had taken it out on me. Because he didn't understand.

I sighed, and wiped away a few tears in the corner of my eyes. As I stepped out of Bloaty's, I felt rain hit me. Rain... shit!

Zim!

I hoped he was okay... wherever he'd run off to. I figured he must have gone back to his base. I pulled my umbrella from my backpack and opened it, holding it up over my head. I started for his base, but then it occurred to me. Of course that was the most obvious place he'd go, but he was smart. I had a feeling it would be a waste of a trip going there as Zim probably already knew that would be the first place I'd look and went someplace else. Defeated and sad, I trudged home. The rain pelted down even harder. By now all the stupid kids out for Halloween had run home, or under shelter. I was glad. The screaming was annoying. Fate really had it in for me today.

My heart felt heavy as I opened up the door, and pulled off my wet coat. I threw the umbrella down and went into the living room to find Gaz watching TV. She turned and grinned at me.

"Hey... you don't look too happy." She commented. "Bad day?"

"Shit day."

"Not surprised," she replied. "People can only stand you for so long."

I hissed at her. "What would you know."

"More than you."

I clenched my fists, trying not to get angry with her. She really knew how to flare my nerves.

"I saw that commotion with Zim... after skool," she continued. "What was that about?"

"Not like you'd care."

"I don't... I just thought it would be interesting to see how you'd cope with Zim dying and all."

I whipped my head up and gave her the worst glare I could muster.

"ZIM ISN'T DEAD!"

She laughed a little. "No, I know... you saved him... right? Big superhero Dib. Do you feel proud?"

I snarled. She was starting to get to me.

"Seems odd the way you've been lately... you like him, don't you? You're turning queer. I always knew you would..."

"S-SHUT UP!"

"I think you love him... an alien. You're in love with him. You're becoming a fag, heh."

I tried not to let her get to me, but she did. After all that happened with Zim today... my feelings... my lust... my emotions... she was getting to me... she was breaking me.

"SHUT UP! WHAT THE HELL WOULD YOU KNOW ANYWAY? NOT LIKE YOU GIVE TWO SHITS!"

She looked a little shocked. Probably because I'd never yelled back at her before. She was so used to treating me like shit that she thought I'd never retaliate. For years I'd been her punching sack. Fuck that.

I slammed my fist into a nearby wall in anger, before storming upstairs to my bedroom.

The first thing I was greeted with after the door slammed was another beeping message on my computer. Wiping away frustrated tears, I calmed myself a little and went over to check it.

_Agent Mothman,_

_I am writing to inform you that the Eyeballs have revoked your membership. There was been limited to no activity or response from you. There is rumour that you are keeping footage from the network. Actions will be made if you do not present your promised/archived footage. The Eyeball Network does not tolerate incompetence._

_Agent Darkbooty._

"FUCK! GOD DAMN IT!" I roared, kicking at my desk. Those bastards!

I no longer had an interest in that stupid organization! I loved Zim... I didn't want him dead. These greedy bastards were going to try and get that footage! That's all they gave a damn about! Some accomplice Darkbooty had been! Screw him! Screw them all!

I sat down at my computer and wrote back to them.  
_  
Dear Eyeballs,_

_I hereby resign from the Swollen Eyeball Network. I have no promised footage, and any footage I have has been deleted. There was never an alien._

_Mothman._

I sniveled angrily as I hit send. I was going to have to get rid of any footage I had.

I pulled up the archives I had of every single video I had ever recorded of Zim over the past five years. There were two hundred and six videos. A lot... too much. I hit ctrl A and selected them all and was about to hit delete when my hand slipped and I ended up accidentally opening the last video. It was the one of Zim on the couch with the pig. I felt my heart wrench. No... no, I couldn't keep this... I had to delete it for Zim's safety. If those bastards got their hands on any of this footage, they'd track down Zim and capture him... kill him.

My heart wrenched painfully. I selected all of the videos again and hit delete. The confirmation box showed. Yes.

I hit the ok button and the videos disappeared. I opened up the recycle bin and emptied it. Gone.

Five years of work gone.

I stared for a moment, having slight regrets, but what was done was done. Zim was too important to me. I couldn't lose him... not now... not after five years.

I closed the message and turned off my email screen. The screen behind it showed my camera feed in the garage. The one I used to monitor Tak's ship stashed away in my garage. It was dark in there because of the rain and the low amount of light. I stared at it for a moment before sitting down on my bed, pushing my head into my hands.

What a horrible day.

I had felt so good before, but now I just felt like crap. It had started out so good... and then Zim had accused me like that... and now this shit from the Eyeballs... and on top of that my own sexual frustration and feelings...

I felt so stressed out.

But one thing bothered me the most. Zim.

What if he didn't like me in the way I liked him? What if he only saw me as a friend and nothing more than that? I lusted him. I wanted him... as something more than a friend. Hell... I couldn't deny myself of it anymore.

I loved him. I was falling for him! I'd loved him for the past three months! I'd been juggling my feelings for him around and telling myself that I didn't love him... I didn't like him. But it was just me lying to myself. For at least three years I'd told myself I was straight. That I liked girls... and it had only taken not even two minutes for me to admit to myself that I was gay and that I was falling in love with Zim. Man, I was so screwed up. But I couldn't hide my feelings anymore. It was just too much to bottle up. If I kept it inside of me, it would destroy me.

Zim seemed like the only thing that mattered to me anymore. Gaz didn't. My dad certainly didn't. Zim. Just Zim.

He made my life worth living... and if he rejected me... I...

I sighed. I felt no point in being here if he rejected me. I'd devoted five years of my life to him. I would devote many more. Zim was my all. He was everything to me.

Zim was like a Godsend after mom had gone.

I needed him. I needed him so much.

I was jolted out of my thoughts for a moment or so when a bolt of lightning flashed and illuminated my bedroom. It had also illuminated the garage on the CCTV feed on my computer. And during that brief moment, I had spotted something lying in the cockpit of Tak's ship!

What the fuck?

I leapt off my bed, claiming my baseball bat. The last thing I needed was an intruder. I bolted down stairs, ignoring Gaz as I rushed out into the rain and around to the garage. Creeping in slowly, I approached the ship. Another flash of lighting and I saw that there was definitely something in there. I raised the bat, ready to strike.

"HEY! GET THE HELL OUTTA THERE!" I roared.

The figure bolted upright and leapt out of the cockpit. It bolted for the garage entrance, but I blocked its path. Curse this weather! It was hard to see what it was. It was no help that the stupid garage light had blown up a few weeks back. I had been working on the ship and it had blown. Of course, there hadn't been any spares and I hadn't had the time to purchase another. I bottled down my frustration and slammed my hand onto the door release. The garage door shut before the intruder had a chance to get out. I raised the bat a little higher and approached the intruder, ready to beat the living daylights out of them for trespassing and discovering MY alien spaceship. They tried to get around me, but I blocked them at every turn.

"YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE!" I roared. "TRESPASSER!"

I felt my anger flare up. I backed the trespasser into a corner between the door and the wall and was just about ready to swing when another flash of lightning illuminated the garage. I raised the bat right back and was in the middle of starting to swing when the trespasser cried out.

"DIB! NO!"

That voice... it couldn't be...

I dropped the bat. Another flash of lighting lit up the garage.

Oh God...

I'd just been about to hit Zim. The trespasser was Zim.

I shook. I felt guilt flood though me... I should have looked. Oh God...

"I'm so sorry Zim..." I cried out, running to him and pulling him into a hug. I could feel him quivering badly. All my fault.

"I'm sorry... I didn't know it was you... I'm sorry..."

I could feel him sigh under me. "It is fine, Dib-friend."

"No, no it's not. I was just about to bash you up!"

"I shouldn't have come in here... but... Zim... was running... I didn't know it was your garage, Dib! It was raining too heavy to leave and I haven't bathed in paste! Zim is sorry!"

"Don't apologize... it's my fault... I-I didn't explain. I know why you're angry..."

He pulled back from me and in the dim light I could just barely make out his gaze.

"Why Zim is angry? Zim is not angry Dib... just, very confused. At this weirdness. At the pain... in my belly. I get it around you, and I do not know why..."

"You ran off before I could explain..." I said softly.

He was quiet.

"Come on Zim... you can come inside..."

I took off my coat and threw it over him, opening up the garage. I ran with him back into the house, and completely ignored Gaz as I brought the alien up to my bedroom. Once inside, I locked the door behind us and took the coat away from him before any of the water drops burned his skin. He looked at me.

Still in that costume... only now he didn't look like the badass devil I'd seen step into the classroom this morning. He looked scared... hurt.

Lost.

"Zim..."

He sat down on my carpet, before looking up at me.

"Why... why do you make Zim feel this way?" he spoke a moment or so later. His tone wasn't one of demand, but instead was soft, with a hint of curiosity.

"Because Zim... I... I think... you might feel the same way about me as I do you."

"Do you... refer to the 'more than' thing?"

More than? Oh. More than a friend. Right.

I nodded.

"Zim... I... I'm falling in love with you. I..." I sighed, swallowing a little. "I love you, Zim."

He was quiet for a moment. I shook, dreading his reaction. What if he rejected me... what if...

"Eh?"

I'd never wanted to hit my forehead so hard in my life. Instead, I drew in a deep breath.

"Zim... you mean a lot to me. The world, possibly. I... I can't live without you... not anymore, anyway. Love is a bond... between two people. It means they want to be together. They care about each other... the bond is special and cannot be broken... two halves become whole..." my voice was so shaky as I said this. Honestly, I was terrified of how he'd react.

He frowned and I felt my heart drop down into my stomach. Was that good? Or was it bad?

"Love... so, is love this hurty feeling Zim has been feeling in his squeedily-spooch?"

I shrugged. I really had no answer to that. Only he could tell me, but he still didn't understand. I tried to make him understand the feeling in the way I did. Perhaps that would help, if slightly.

"Well... my heart hurts around you. I feel like... I need you. All the time. Is that how you feel?"

It seemed like forever before he answered me.

"Zim... thought it was friendship. But perhaps... it is this love after all."

I felt my heart leap. "Zim... I... I know I said we should be friends... but, I can't hold back anymore. It's just too much... it's been eating at me for the past three months."

His eyes widened. "Three months?"

I nodded, before going over to him. "I love you Zim..."

I stared into his eyes, waiting for a response. He closed his eyes. I held my breath.

"I... Zim... is still confused, Dib... I... I need to think."

What? What the... what the fuck?

"W-what ? Still?"

He nodded. "I am sorry, Dib-friend. Just... a little more time." he gave me a small smile, while I felt my insides shatter like glass.

He stood up. I couldn't look at him.

"Dib-friend?"

"..."

"I will see you tomorrow, okay? I... can Zim, use your un-brelly-ya?"

I couldn't answer him.

"...Bye Dib-friend..."

I hardly noticed as he left the bedroom. I didn't even hear the door shut downstairs.

I still didn't know. I wouldn't till tomorrow. There was a possibility I wouldn't ever know. Perhaps I was just getting my hopes up and wasting my time.

But I remembered my mother's words.

_'Never stop trying until you know can say the answer yourself.'_

Her sentence had always confused me. But now, I understood it. As clear as the remanents of shattered glass inside of me.

Zim hadn't given me an answer. All he needed was a little more time. I wasn't sure how long... or when he'd have an answer, but all I could do was give him that time.

After all, that answer would be the one that would either make us.

Or break us.


	22. A Frenzified Desire

**A/n:**

I've decided that I won't be replying to reviews anymore before the start of chapters. It's too time consuming, especially since there is always more than one review left by one person, and I have to go back and forth between pages to find answers. Don't worry though ;) I still read every review I get. Thank you to everybody who reviewed the last chapters after that major-ish update. There will be about another 18 chapters to go before I complete this story. To be honest, I write this as I go, but I have a clear mindset of what is going to happen in events leading to the climax, and the finale.

I do hope you all enjoy the rest of the story.

**One final note. This chapter is a lemon. From here on, the ZADR side of the story comes into play. If you have a problem with two males making love and wish to voice that, I suggest you SHUT UP AND GET LOST. This story is ZADR and it is mentioned in the description that it would 'spruce up.'**

So, Anti-ZADR's turn back now. If you want to read on, go ahead, but keep your mouths shut if you have something negative to say. You've been warned.

* * *

**Chapter 22**

Dib's P.O.V

The only time I had ever felt nervous in my life was when the doctors had informed my family of how long my mother had left to live. The days leading up to her death was the worst time of my life. Usually I was a confident person and having raised Gaz on my own after mum had left us, I had to deal with a lot of things that kids are not supposed to have to worry about. It had been a good experience for me because now I had already developed the skills I would need if I were to move out and live by myself. I had never thought I would feel as nervous as I did back then ever again.

But I did now.

It was the morning after that incident in the garage with Zim. The weather was still bad and it was raining as I trudged to hi-skool. Thankfully however, it had stopped to just a drizzle. I didn't have my umbrella with me, so I had my trench coat pulled up over my head. I didn't care too much if I did get wet, but my scythe-like hair usually irritated me when it was wet, slopping across my face and refusing to stay back. I'd never really cared about my hair, like the other guys did. Most of them had decided to dye their hair or change their hair styles completely, but not me. I rather liked my hair, even if it did remind me of my father. I had inherited my mother's eyes and I was thankful for that. It reminded me that some of her was inside of me whenever I looked into the mirror. I still wore glasses. My father had all the money in the world to afford contacts, but I didn't care for them. I liked my glasses and I couldn't imagine myself without them, having grown with them since I was about three.

I sighed as the skool building loomed ahead. It was foggy out today, so it was like looking at a black looming shadow rising from a barren wasteland. As I approached the gates, I couldn't help but wonder about Zim and felt my heart wrench painfully. I would have to face him today and I had no idea what things would be like between us now that I had told him that I loved him. Did he think about it at all, like he said he would? There were so many what ifs. What if he thought of me differently now? What if he didn't want to be friends anymore and was disgusted with me?

I felt like sinking into a hole and burying myself beneath the ground. But... I needed to know. I needed to know today. I couldn't take much more of it, especially because of how much I wanted him to be mine. I needed him so much. And it wasn't just my mind that wanted him, it was my body too. Yesterday had really been an eye opener and from it I had started to see the alien in a different light.

As I approached my classroom, I let out a sigh and felt my breath catch in my throat. There he was.

He was at his locker, pulling out his books. I turned my back to him and went to my own locker, getting out my books for the day. When I turned back around, he wasn't there. I stared at the empty space for a moment or so, before looking to the door of the classroom. The bell hadn't gone yet, so Zim must have gone in there. But when I peered around the door frame, the classroom was empty.

I slid down against the wall and sat on the ground, waiting for the first bell to ring. It was kinda strange the way he'd disappeared like that. Perhaps he wasn't going to talk to me today and that was why he had gone. What if he was never going to talk to me again? I hoped to God not. I hadn't done anything wrong... only admitted to his face that I was in love with him.

I banged my head against the wall behind me. Why did things have to be so confusing.

Eventually the bell for homeroom rang and I went into the classroom. As usual, half the students were late. I sat and listened to my mp3 yet again as I waited for the bell to ring for the first class of the day. Science. Well, at least I had something to look forward to.

I made my way to the science labs, still not seeing Zim around. I could see some of my classmates waiting outside so I joined them. The teacher hadn't arrived yet and the door was locked. When she finally did arrive, I followed everybody inside not caring if I was the last one to sit down. Nobody wanted to sit near me anyway. Some of the students sniggered at me, turning around to watch me sit down. I just ignored them, putting my head into my hands on the desk after I pulled out some homework. A few moments later, I felt the desk rattle a little beneath me and looked up to see Zim taking a seat about three desks down from me. I looked towards him, but he avoided my gaze. I buried my head into my arms.

Great. The day hadn't even started yet and already it was shit.

I could hardly pay attention during science. I was too distracted by my thoughts and bubbling emotions. I did see Zim glimpse towards me a few times out of the corner of my eye, but that was it. Whenever I tried to make eye contact with him, he just looked away or looked past me. Why was he ignoring me? Unable to take it anymore, I ripped out a piece of notepaper and scribbed a note to him.

_Zim, do you have an answer? Why are you ignoring me?_

I scrunched it up and threw it at him. It landed beside him. He glimpsed towards it, but didn't pick it up. He never did. What the hell? We had a double science lesson that morning, so I'd be stuck in here till recess. When the first lesson finally ended, we were supposed to work with a partner and do a few plant experiments up until recess. Everybody paired up, bar me and Zim. The teacher put us together anyway, and I saw Zim get up to come to me, however, he went past me and over to a work bench. I stood up and followed him with a pencil and note paper, going to the bench he had walked to, but as I joined him, he turned his back and went to fetch the stuff we needed for the experiments. When he did finally come back, he didn't look at me and instead started doing the tasks on the sheet the teacher had given us.

I nudged him. "Zim!"

He finally looked at me at that, but said nothing. I could see something in his eyes in that brief moment, and at that moment I knew he wasn't angry.

"Zim, why won't you talk to me?"

He sighed. He ignored me again and continued to do the experiment. Hurt and frustrated, I grabbed some equipment myself and started doing one of the tasks. It was hard to concentrate. Why Zim wouldn't talk to me was really getting to me. It was like this between us up until recess. The alien had left me to pack away the equipment, hurrying out of the lab. No way in hell was I letting him get out of this. He was giving me mixed signals and I didn't like it. It was only making me feel worse. I needed an answer. Surely he had one by now!

I grabbed my books and rushed out of the classroom, not caring about the other students and their reactions as I pushed them out of the way. I spotted Zim ahead, about to exit the science pool. Without hesitating, I ran as fast as I could and grabbed his arm, stopping him from rushing off. He sneered at me, but I had a firm grip. Students sneered at us as they past and left the building, and soon it was just us two left.

"Zim!

"Don't touch me!" he spat, and tried to pull away. I returned his sneer and jerked him back, pushing him into an empty lab and shutting the door behind us.

"Zim, what is going on? Why are you ignoring me like this?"

He looked away, and I could see him sigh.

"What about yesterday? Didn't it mean anything to you? Do you know how long it's taken me to build up the courage to admit to you how I felt? Three months, and this is all I get? What the hell? Did you even think about it, like you said you would? Answer me Zim!" I shouted as I approached him. He backed against a desk, looking up at me with wide eyes. No answer.

"ZIM!" I shouted.

"Yes! Yes Dib! I did!"

He did...? I stopped, and closed my eyes for a moment or so. "Well...?"

"Dib-friend... Zim... I..."

I stood frozen to the spot. I felt my heart start to race a little. "Tell me!"

"Dib..." he straightened up a little, walking towards me and looking up at me. I could see his eyes dart slightly. He seemed almost confused with himself. I swallowed some spit in the back of my throat. He stopped.

He was still quiet.

He shifted his arms, drawing my attention to them. He placed a hand on his stomach and one where I assumed his heart was.

"Yesterday... and the times before that... just here was hurting, but now here does too. And it happens around you," he said. "My squeedily-spooch feels weird around you. You're making my PAK confused. Zim is confused."

I stared at him.

"This... love thing," he continued. "Zim has... been thinking. A lot. I shut myself away in my labs and thought a lot. And I think... this hurty feeling, is making sense now. It is that lovey thing and Zim has been infected by it. Dib-friend, you have infected me..."

I drew in a small breath.

"Zim..." I breathed. "Do you love me? Or not?"

I needed to know. Now.

He stared at me for a moment or so, before suddenly he grinned at me "Dib-friend, Zim loves you!"

H-he loved me? He loved me back?

"W-what?"

He frowned. "Are you deaf...? Zim said, he loves you! You said you loved Zim, yes? Well, I love you back."

He crossed his arms behind his back and tilted his head slightly at me.

I couldn't move. I was frozen to the spot, still wondering if I'd heard him right even though he'd just asked me if I was deaf. I was snapped out of my little trance when he kicked at me, but I could hardly feel it. I was almost dumbfounded. Eventually it started to settle in and I felt a huge smile creeping over my face. I think my tongue poked out a little.

"Dib-friend?" he questioned, still frowning.

"R-really... Zim? You feel the same way... ?" I asked, my voice just above a whisper.

He gave a brief nod, and smiled at me. Oh my God. Oh my God. He loved me! He fucking loved me!

He looked at me for a moment or so, before hesitantly raising his arms and giving me a gesture. He looked to the side a little, and I could see a strange greenish hue on his cheeks, before he looked back at me and gave me a wide grin.

"Come to Zim."

I stood with my jaw slack. For God knows how long.

"DIB!" he ordered, growing impatient with me and stamping a foot. "Come to- "

And before he could finish, I had lunged for him, wrapping my arms around him tightly and cutting him off. The force knocked us both backward and we toppled over a desk. There was a massive crash as the desk fell over, and so did we. I couldn't care less at that moment as I held him tight against me. I could feel his arms snaking around my waist and holding me. I was in bliss. His body was against mine! I was hugging him and he was hugging me! He wasn't pushing away but instead was welcoming me!

The only thing I'd ever wanted... for the past three months... and here we were. He was perfect. In fact he was even better than I had imagined he would be. Just holding him close to me I already had a small taste of just how deep his perfection rooted. I could feel him rub his cheek against mine in a slight nuzzle, and I returned it before clasping his head with both of my hands and staring him in the eyes. I gasped, a sharp intake of air filling my lungs and fueling a small fire within me. He looked flustered as he gazed back at me and I saw something in those false eyes I'd never seen before.

"Z-Zim!"

I felt his claws clench against my shirt as he lay on top of me.

"Dib-friend..." he whispered, his soft hot breath against my cheek.

And then, I kissed him. I mashed my mouth right against his and felt a thrill surge throughout me when he opened his mouth and allowed me entrance. I could feel him rocking slightly on top of me as our passion deepened. I felt his tongue slip into my mouth and explore each corner, feeling every ridge and dent of my gum. He ran it along my teeth before wrapping it around my tongue as our kiss deepened.

Damn.

There was a slight taste of something I couldn't place as I ran my tongue over his zipper-like teeth, exploring the alien's moist cavern. I ran my hands through that static hair as we kissed harder, knocking pencils from desks as we rolled between the rows, not knowing where we'd wind up and not caring. All I could see was him at that moment. When we broke apart, he looked a little angered, but then sighed. A tiny smile arose on his lips. I stared into those fake eyes.

"Shit..." I breathed."You're... you're... so perfect!"

A devious look crossed his face, before I let out a small cry of surprise as he suddenly pushed me away and stood up, straightening his uniform and hair.

"Zim..?" I asked, feeling almost heartbroken at the sudden and uncalled for rejection. I didn't have much time to contemplate on it when suddenly the lab door opened, and our science teacher stared at us, wide eyed.

"What the hell is going on in here?"

I bit my lip. "Uh..."

"OUT... ! OUT! GET OUT!" he roared at us, and I scrambled for my things, as did Zim. We fled the labs and ran back through the corridors. Zim started to laugh, louder and louder. It echoed though-out the empty corridor around us and I stared at him. It was the same kind of laugh I'd hear from him during our childhood... evil, yet intense with a dark edge to it.

"Z-Zim...?"

He turned to me as our running slowed to a walk, still laughing. Eventually he quietened down.

"Are you, satisfied?" he asked me a few moments later.

What was that supposed to mean... ?

"Y-yeah, I guess." I stammered.

He nodded. "GOOD. You were supposed to be!"

I swallowed a little. That alien taste was still in my mouth. "Do... do you love me, Zim?"

He gave me one of his infamous Zim looks, furrowing one eye-ridge and staring at me wide-eyed with the other eye fully open.

"Do I not love you?" he asked me.

"Well... you said-"

He shook a hand at me. "Zim loves you, Dib-friend."

I let out a sigh. He loved me. He really did. The kiss HAD happened. He wasn't rejecting me.

I could hardly focus as I pushed my books back into my locker after we'd arrived back at our homerooms. I could feel my heart racing. A few students bumped against me from behind as they ran past. I barely noticed the bell ring to indicate the end of recess and the only thing that dominated my mind was Zim. Something barely registered in the back of my mind that it was time for Info Tech, but as I turned from my locker the only thing I could see was a flustered Irken with a slightly askew wig. He turned his head to the side and I could see him looking at me out the corner of his eye, an evident smirk on his features. The hair on his forehead was tousled, and hung down like I'd seen with his devil costume... I felt the air leak out of me and my forehead grow hot.

Soon the corridors were empty, and it was just the two of us. We'd be late, but I didn't care. Nothing else mattered, only what I saw standing in front of me. He finished at his locker and shut it, turning to me with that same look I'd seen just after we'd nuzzled cheeks.

I could see a slight pant. And then, we were pressed up against the lockers, feverishly kissing again. He grabbed my collar as I pushed him, backwards away from the lockers. Space... isolation. That's what we needed. I pushed him down the corridor, into the first set of double doors that came into my view. The gym. It was empty. No classes were on today.

We continued, trying not to trip over each other in our passionate frenzy. I pushed him backwards, across the floor. I had no idea where we'd wind up as my mind was too much of a blur. But the darkness of the change rooms sparked something in my subconsciousness and then I realised where we were. Zim looked almost out of it. I pushed us into a cubicle, and slammed the door shut behind us before yet again we were pressed up against a solid surface. This time it was the cubicle wall. Our mouths pressed together in a hard, passionate kiss. I felt him grasp my hair, tousling it, and I did the same to him. He let out a moan beneath me as I picked up that wig and threw it to the side, his antennae unveiled. I broke our kiss to press his head down, taking one of those sensitive stalks and running my tongue along it. The Irken let out a shrill gasp, and I could feel a hard shudder rip down his body. We fell back against the bench, and I took the fine appendage into my mouth delicately, sucking gently. Zim was in ecstasy. His claws dug into my shirt and I could feel them digging into my skin. I continued to suck, and Zim went lax beneath me, drawing out short, shrill gasps.

I gave the same treatment to the other stalk atop his head, before he pinned me back against the wall and sat on top of me on the cubicle bench. His antennae were down across his eyes, but the alien wasn't pissed. I felt him trail a claw down my shirt to my stomach before he drew it back up and pressed it against my lips.

"Dib-hyooman. Do you love Zim?"

I nodded. "Yeah... hell yeah..."

"Good. Now... obey... " he whispered slowly.

I grinned, feeling my pants tighten at the feel of his crotch against mine from how he was positioned on top of me.

"Zi-"

"BE QUIET!"

I shuddered a little as he trailed his claw down to my stomach again and back up. He did this a fair few times before I grabbed him and pressed his body against mine, breathing slowly over his shoulder.

Fuck I needed him. I wanted him. He drew back at looked at me, an unknown desire in those fake eyes. Slowly, I reached up and pulled away the contacts. Naturally, he flinched a little, but I was able to take them out and two pools of liquid red fire stared back at me. I threw them to the side, my heart racing again at his true nature presented before me.

"Dib-hyooman... remember that... strange feeling I told you of? In my squeedily-spooch?" he asked softly, a hint of well disguised lust to the edge of his voice.

I nodded. "Do... you want me Zim?"

He nodded.

And from that moment on, all I remember was the powerful shock wave of heat that flooded my entire being from head to toe. I frantically pulled off my shirt while he slipped off his gloves before pulling off his shirt, exposing that flawless green skin. I noticed his PAK hover beside him, but I was too distracted by the perfect curvature of his body as I ran my hands down his slender torso to his waist. He kicked off his boots as we madly kissed again before slipping off his pants, which soon joined the pile of clothes beside him. I felt my jaw drop slightly as my vision focused for a moment and I took in his naked form in its entirety.

"Oh... shit... you're... you're BEAUTIFUL!" I gasped.

My lust for him rose rapidly and I grabbed him as our passion deepened. For a brief moment I was scared at how this was going to work as I undid my fly and let out my pant-straining erection but as he raised his legs and wrapped himself around me I found that I slid into him with ease and everything else was just a blur of grey mixed with flashes of ecstasy. I felt his hot breath against my skin as he let out a few moans of discomfort as I filled him entirely, but then he let out the sweetest sound I'd ever heard. Not quite human, not quite alien, but something in-between. I smiled. It was his first time too and I felt a small confidence boost in myself. I rubbed my palms along his thighs as I rode him, thrusting into him gently and he let out small sweet grunts of pleasure. His skin was so soft, almost like a newborn baby's after a warm bath. He had no body hair at all. Perfect, flawless, green skin. He was perfection.

I felt his claws scratching up my back but the pain was barely registering in my clouded subconsciousness. I pumped a little faster and felt Zim's whole body start to clench up. He tightened his legs around my waist and held me a little tighter. I gritted my teeth as I felt my climax near its peak before I couldn't hold back any longer and had my release. Zim went lax on top of me before jolting back and looking at me. He didn't say anything. I stared back at him before he let out a high-pitched strangled sort of noise from the back of his throat.

"W-what did you fill me with?"

"Uh..."

"DIB!" he screeched. "It is gooey!"

I blushed. "I ejaculated, Zim!"

He gave me an odd look, before slumping against me, panting slightly.

"Will it hurt me?"

I smiled a little, but was too tired to laugh. "No. No Zim, it won't."

"Good." he replied. I reached up and stroked his antennae to calm him. He let out an odd noise against me and I felt his throat vibrate against my shoulder. After a short hesitation of wondering what the hell was happening, I realised that he was giving off some kind of purr and felt my heart leap.

He was so beautiful. I felt so lucky at that moment. I couldn't possibly be any happier than I was now. I had him and he was mine... he was finally mine...

"I love you, Zim..."

I felt my heart pound a little, before I heard a small tired voice answer me.

"Zim loves you too, Dib-pet."

Pet?

Heh. I could get used to that.

* * *

**End Note: I view Zim as a hermaphrodite. If you have a problem with that, suck it. It's my story, not yours. Do not flame/bash me because of how I view the alien or determine his sex. I won't tolerate anybody who comes along and whines that Zim should have a penor at me. There is a reason I view him as this and you'll find out later on.**


	23. A Shock For Dib Pet

**A/n:**

I've had few questions in regards to this being an mpreg ZaDr. I'm not going to say, you'll just have to wait and see!

Thanks again for the reviews. And if anybody is interested in seeing some art from the story, please visit me on deviantArt! (metros2soul)

This chapter will be another special – in Dib's POV, and then the usual pattern will resume, following with Zim.

Lol, you've probably never read anything like this before! Enjoy.

**Warning: This chapter is a lemon. It contains sexual interaction and content.  
**

* * *

**Chapter 23**

[Special] Dib's P.O.V

The rest of that week was the best time of my life. It was everything I could have ever hoped for, and more. Zim and I were inseparable. We'd sit with other in class and talk. If we couldn't talk, we'd pass notes back and forth until we were able to talk again. During breaks we'd hold hands and either sit in our loser's spot, or up on the skool roof, a new hiding spot which Zim had introduced me to. When nobody was else was looking, we would kiss. If we were isolated, we'd just lie with each other with our shirts off and talk. I'd stroke those antennae and he would rest his head against my shoulder. He no longer had a problem with me taking off his disguise, as long as there wasn't anybody else around to see.

Zim had finally opened up to me as I had him, and he'd started telling me about his past and his life back on IRK. Those constant questions I'd wondered about him, I finally had answers to. I had asked him about his antennae and his eyes and he'd explained to me how Irken's were superior to humans. He used his antennae to hear, but he told me that he was also able to smell and even taste through them – which explained the strange reactions his body had when I touched them. His eyes were ocular implants which all Irken's were implanted with before birth. His eyes had actually come out of their sockets a few times in the past and he was able to just push them back in. This had disgusted me, but also intrigued me.

Zim had no parents. He was a clone. Reproduction had been eliminated years ago on his planet and Irken's were conceived from the DNA of past Irken donors. Each Irken's PAK established their personality. The reason for this was so that the Tallest could maintain the empire without emotions getting in the way, and so that Irken males and females would not fall in love and cast aside their duties. Zim's PAK was defective, which explained why he had emotions. After I'd learned about this, I just loved him even more. He was beautiful to me, inside and out.

He'd explained to me that Irken's were sexless and determined as male or female from their appearances, antennae and voice. All Irken's had the same anatomy, and the males were no different from females. The first time Zim and I had had sex in the change room at skool, it had been a nagging question in the back of my mind when I realised he was different from me. I had expected that knowing that he was a different species, but now I understood why. All Irken's were capable of reproduction, but it had been eliminated out of the system.

I know I had ejaculated inside of him, but he seemed okay so far. I did wonder if he could possibly fall pregnant though and it worried me. Would that even work between us anyway? I was a human and he was an alien. Either way, no matter what happened, I would stand by his side and support him no matter what. I would protect him if I had to... he meant everything to me.

He'd also admitted to me that he'd grown fond of Earth and didn't really want to see it destroyed, like I was led to believe. He was a lot like me – he liked to sit out on the grass behind his home and gaze up at the stars, or sit and watch the sun set as it captivated him. He found Earth beautiful and it was like an escape to him. IRK was cold and full of machinery. There were no trees, or flowers. It was an industrial planet. He had even apologized to me about the time he'd mentioned Earth being a zoo. He had felt bad about it. He hadn't wanted that, but his Tallest might've wanted it.

But what had shocked me the most was his age. He was 177 years old – in Irken years, that was. I knew that he was much older than me, but still. Humans were lucky enough to live to 100. Here on Earth he was my age though. About seventeen. Where he was from, 177 was young and equivalent to teenage years. Most Irken's average life span was 300 – 350 years. I couldn't even being to imagine living that long. But before the PAK had been introduced, the average lifespan of an Irken was only 150 years. Zim's PAK really did keep him alive. Even though it was an amazing contraption, I couldn't imagine living controlled by a metal pod on my back. I wondered if it hurt Zim because there were two holes in his back where the PAK attached to him. It made me cringe slightly, but I preferred not to think about it too much.

As he had told me about his life, I had told him all about mine and opened up to him in tears about my mother and the impact she had had on my life. He'd held me close as I told him. I thought he might laugh at me for crying in front of him, but instead he was a little upset. I'd told him about how he coming to earth had changed my life. How it had helped me get through my sisters constant taunts and my father's neglect. How he'd been my motivation and inspiration. It really cheered him up and I'd never seen the Irken look so happy in my life. In the span of a few days, both of us had answered five years worth of questions we'd had about each other. I'd met and found somebody that finally understood me, even if we had been galaxies apart. Zim truly was the best thing about my life. I'd felt so empty when mum had gone, but now, because I had Zim, I felt whole again for the first time since she'd died.

I hadn't heard back from the Eyeball's yet about my resignation, and it worried me. I'd stashed away everything I had collected of Zim over the past five years, in a safe buried deep in my father's lab. The spy camera was still in his home and I'd have to find some way to get it out without Zim knowing. Even though he was my boyfriend now, I was sure he'd be pretty pissed with me to know I'd been spying on him. I'd left myself a reminder to do this on my corkboard at home.

It was finally Friday afternoon and I was waiting for Zim to come out from his final class. The other students had piled out as soon as the bell had rang, but Zim hadn't come out yet. I walked over and peered into the gym, and that's when I spotted Mr. Elliot talking to him by the basketball ring. I felt my heart leap at the sight of him in his gym uniform (my sexy alien!), but frowned at that damn teacher. He'd been speaking with him a lot lately. Zim spotted me standing there after a moment or so and his entire face lit up, before he was distracted by the teacher again. After another couple of minutes, I looked up to see him heading for me, and perked up, grinning like an idiot.

I opened my arms as Zim jumped into them and we hugged.

"Dib-pet!" he cooed, and my grin got wider as he used his affectionate 'pet' name for me.

"Hi space-boy!"

He pulled back and looked at me before we shared a quick kiss. He smiled at me and I returned it. I reached out my hand to take his, but he put a hand to my face and waved it at me.

"Zim needs to change."

"Okay." I replied, biting my lower lip. He grabbed my hand and led me back into the gym as we headed for the change rooms. I followed him into a cubicle and shut the door, sitting down and waiting for my boyfriend to change.

His PAK disconnected and hovered beside him again as he pulled off his shirt. I sat with my elbows resting on my knees and my chin in my hands, taking in the aliens beautiful physique. He looked at me slightly as he pulled off his shorts and I stared at his naked form, feeling lustful. He didn't wear underwear (I don't think he knew what they were. I'd have to introduce him). I felt like taking him there and then, but knew that we'd have to hurry and get out of there before they locked up the gym and we'd be stuck in there. I stood up and helped him back into his standard uniform, teasing him a little as I helped him into his pants. He slapped me on the head.

Once he was fully clothed, he put his gym uniform away and I picked him up into my arms as we headed to our lockers. Everybody had left the skool by now so we were the last ones there. Once claiming my backpack and books for the weekend, I headed over to Zim's locker and stood beside him, watching him lovingly as he pulled out some stuff he needed before slamming shut his locker. He looked at me and grinned, showing me his zipper-teeth, before we held hands and left the skool.

At first I had been afraid of going out in public holding hands with the alien, but now I just didn't care what people thought. I was gay, and I wasn't going to try and hide that when I had so much love to give to Zim. If anything, I was proud he was mine. It was all I had ever wanted, after all. Zim and I headed back to my house. Since we'd fallen in love, Zim had been spending almost every night at my house. Gaz thought it was weird, but there was nothing she could do about it. Not like she cared anyway. And of course, dad hadn't been home in months. I don't think he was planning on coming back anytime soon.

Zim seemed a little fidgety as we walked and I asked him what was wrong. He looked at me and I could see concern in those fake purple eyes.

"That Elliot-hyooman is getting worse. Questioning Zim. He wanted to see mom and dad."

I knew he was referring to his roboparents. He didn't have parents after all, only robot decoys. After that parent-teacher night years ago, I knew it wasn't exactly a good idea from him to bring them to the skool.

"Why? Is it about the bullying thing?" I asked.

Zim shrugged. "I think so. But, he is suspicious of me. He asked me, today, where my 'parents' were and if they'd be there for the meeting with him. Zim has no parents. And, I will NOT bring those robots again! Stupid hyooman!"

I felt a little worried. How much more persistent was he going to get?

"When is this meeting?"

"Monday after skool."

"Do you have to go?"

Zim nodded reluctantly. "If Zim doesn't he will be coming to the base himself."

"What the hell?"

Zim just sighed. I gripped his hand a little tighter. "Don't worry, worst comes to worst I can get dad to have two scientists come and pretend to be parents."

Zim looked at me. "Thank you, Dib-love."

Dib-love? I felt my heart leap. He was so sweet on the inside.

We hurried back to my house after a few more minutes of walking. I led Zim inside and we headed up to my bedroom. Gaz wasn't home. She'd told me this morning she was going to spend the night with her 'gaming associates' at this game night thing she went to every Friday night at the local university. I knew she'd be okay, even if I was pissed with her. She'd been there at least three times before and the people there looked after her. Even if she hated me, I had to keep in mind that she was still my baby sister and we were family.

That meant Zim and I had the house to ourselves and man, was it going to be fun. I'd picked out some movies for us to watch, all of them about aliens. I'd also got some popcorn, waffles and lemonade from the shops. When Zim noticed the movies and bean bags I'd also got in my room, he let out a squeak and leaped onto the pink bean bag. I'd started to notice that he had a thing for pink or maroon coloured things so I had feeling he'd like it.

"You have the sack-things!"

I grinned and nodded. "I picked out some movies for us to watch. I also got some waffles and lemonade. I know you like those. Maybe you'd be up to trying some popcorn as well."

He nodded and picked up the movies to look at them.

"I'll be right back Zim."

I turned and went downstairs to make up the waffles and popcorn. After about ten minutes or so, I headed back up with the food and the drinks. The smell of the popcorn was making my mouth water and I had been sure to butter it up pretty good. I opened my bedroom door and carried the food inside, setting it down on the floor beside Zim. He was still sitting on the bean bag, but he'd taken his disguise off. I couldn't help but stare at him for a moment or so. I did it every time I saw him just out of his disguise. His alien features always captivated me.

His antennae perked up and those pupil-less eyes gazed towards me. I almost got lost in them but snapped out of it when he held a movie up to me. "Zim wants to watch!"

"Okay," I replied, smiling. I took the movie from him and put it into my DVD player, before sitting beside him on the blue bean bag. The movie started and I reached for the remote to select play from the menu, before throwing it aside again. Zim watched me, before focusing on the screen. He picked up a waffle and started chewing on it.

The movie played and we sat in silence and watched it. Occasionally, Zim would point out things about the aliens in the movie and it made me laugh. He thought that our interpretation of aliens was far from legitimate and I couldn't help but agree with him. After all, Zim was a real live alien himself. I'd seen this movie plenty of times before, but I didn't mind watching it again, especially after seeing the reactions Zim had to it. He'd even pointed out a planet to me on the screen and called it a specific name which I couldn't wrap my head around. It was something like 'Zhalhraosbng.'

Chewing on some more popcorn, I reached across and slipped my hand into his. I felt him grip my hand in return as we ate quietly and watched the movie. I noticed his antennae twitch every now and then.

When the movie finished, we talked about it for a little bit, laughing at how stupid some parts of it had been. Zim had enjoyed it though, and that's all that mattered to me. I ejected the DVD and put it away.

"Wanna watch another one?"

"Okay." he replied, and I put in the next movie. We'd finished the food so I put the bean bags together and we sat side by side this time. We held hands again, and Zim rested his head against my shoulder. I gently stroked his antennae and could feel them twitch a little under my finger tips. Zim started to purr again.

When the next movie finally finished, Zim and I just sat and talked for a while. It had started to get dark outside and I heard the sound of rain hitting against my bedroom windows. A flash of lighting lit up the room and Zim jumped beneath me.

"Relax..."

He let out a sigh. I pushed him off and stood up and he looked up at me. "Come on, we can lie on my bed."

That seemed to relax him a little and we both lay down on my bed. I held him close to me, peppering kisses to his cheek and neck. He let out that rare sweet noise again and arched his head slightly to gaze at me. We just gazed at each other for a while before he leaned up and pressed his mouth to mine and once again we kissed. His tongue wrapped itself around mine and I ran my hands along his back to his waist. This prompted movement from him and I felt his hands slip underneath my shirt and up to my chest. I couldn't help but shudder.

"Does Dib-pet like...?" he asked me, and I nodded.

"Why are you so perfect?" I teased, putting a hand to his cheek.

"Because I am Zim!" he gloated, grinning. "And Zim is amazing!"

"I know, you've only made that obvious the past five years." I sighed, but smiled. He stared at me and I leaned forward to kiss him again. Our kiss deepened, and eventually, our passion. I pulled across my curtains to block out the flashes of lighting and soon he was pulling off my shirt as I was his uniform. I undid my pants and he pulled them off before I tugged off his. I felt a hard on at his naked form and let my erection free from its confines. He licked at my neck, and I lay him down, leaning over him and running my hands down his slender frame, before planting kisses down his chest to his abdomen. He panted a little and I could see his tongue loll from his mouth. I grinned at him, before spreading apart his legs and pushing a finger inside of him, feeling his inner walls. He let out a low moan.

I leaned over and kissed him on the neck again as I rubbed my shaft against his entrance, and pushed gently. He gritted his teeth and I could feel his claws dig into my back again, but I pushed on until I filled him. "Dib-love..."

I let him settle for a moment or so, before thrusting. We rocked the bed gently and I could hear him gasping. I bit my own lips at the sight of him beneath me, the flustered look on his face enough to send me into world of bliss. I rode him harder, pushing my shaft into him further and he let out that sweet moan again. Our hands locked and gripped each other as I continued to pump myself into him. He closed his eyes and his antennae danced about his head. I arched my body over him and took one of those fine appendages into my mouth again and he cried out. I pulled him upright so we were sitting and wrapped my arms around him, pushing his head down briefly for better access. We sat like this for a while, and I listened to his low moans of pleasure as I sucked his antennae.

After a while, I pushed him back down and he arched a little further as I thrusted into him again, getting faster and faster.

"DIB!" he cried out, and I could feel another climax starting to arise. My orgasm intensified and rocked my body. Zim was quivering badly in orgasm beneath me and the sight alone was enough to make me release inside of him again.

He let out a small choked sound, drawing back from me and my shaft left him. He raised his legs and looked down at the small sticky mess beneath us, before looking at me. "You filled me with that... gooey stuffs again! Why do you do that?" he questioned me, pointing an accusing finger.

I went red. "Uh... it's natural Zim. It happens when you... when you orgasm."

He tilted his head. "Eh?"

I put my head into my hand. "Orgasm. When you feel really really good. You were doing it before as well... look..." I explained, pointing between his legs. He raised an eye ridge at me, before my face went redder as he felt around that special area. "Zim is wet!" he said like it was the most incredible thing he'd ever heard.

"Well... yeah... that's what happens when you orgasm."

"Zim never knew he was capable of this!"

"W-what?"

I was stunned. Zim didn't know about his own body? How was that possible? He'd lived for 177 years, surely by now he knew about himself and how he worked. But then I remembered what he'd told me about the Tallest eliminating reproduction and mating on IRK. Zim must have never received any information about sex education or the Irken anatomy while he was on IRK. So by us having sex, it was the first time he'd ever known anything about it. He was obviously capable of it and was sexually active. I knew this from when he was giving me those flustered looks back at skool when we first made out. But obviously he'd never taken it into consideration or acted on it. No wonder he was asking me about sex and what it was when we had that assignment. I felt like murdering those Tallest of his for leaving the Irken's in the dark like this, including Zim. They had a right to know about sex-ed. It was important as it was an important role in life. It looked to me like the different varieties of food was the only education the Irken's had. Damn those stupid leaders!

"Dib-pet?" Zim asked me, noticing my long pause.

"Sorry Zim... I... I just can't believe it..."

"Believe what?" he asked me, coming over to me and settling into my lap, hugging me. I rested my head against his and gave him a small kiss.

"Zim, when you were growing up... did you ever learn about your body?"

"No, Zim was trained to be an Invader and worked in labs building weapons with filthy Vortians."

"So you never ever had any sort of lesson about Irken's and their anatomy?"

He shook his head. "Well, Zim learned about how females had curly antennae and eye lashes and talked higher pitched, but that was it."

I let out an agitated growl. Zim tensed a little.

"Dib...?"

"I feel bad... I mean, we've had sex twice now Zim and you don't know how you work. There is more to it... than... well, this."

"More to this, sex?" he asked me. "Really?"

I nodded. "I'll... have to help you learn. But I can't teach you much because I don't really know about Irken's and their anatomy. Only what I see of you and what you've told me so far."

He nodded. I stroked his antennae again and let out a choked moan of surprise as I felt him grab my shaft and give it a squeeze. I looked at what he was doing when I realised that he was curious. He'd probably never seen or heard of it before apart from the research he did for our assignment. By the look on his face I could tell he liked what he was seeing as I could feel him poking me. And then he discovered the rest of my anatomy, and I groaned slightly.

"Dib-pet, this probe thing you possess and these sacks to accompany it are most intriguing to Zim!"

I blushed harder. Nothing like having sex with an alien who knew nothing about it. And I meant nothing. And in the past I'd expected HIM to be the one that would probe me!

I just shook my head and kissed him on the forehead, before we lay down again wrapped in each others arms. I drew up the blankets to keep us warm.

No matter how stupid and clueless Zim was, I loved him with all of my heart. He was perfect in every single way. If his PAK was defective, I hardly noticed. He was my Irken and I'd gladly go to the end of the world for him, even give up my life for him.

I snuggled him a little closer, as we lay and listened to the rain pelting against the window outside as the hours slowly drifted on.


	24. A Curiosity

**Chapter 24**

Zim's P.O.V

Dib had fallen asleep underneath me. Being an Irken I had only needed to rest, but the human had seemed to be knocked out completely from our 'love-making' session. My PAK informed me that it was night time and I sat up a little, drawing back Dib's curtains to peer outside. It was still raining outside and a slight frost overlay had developed over the window. I put my finger to the glass, and shivered a little as a chill swept throughout my body. I was still naked beside the human.

Looking at his sleeping form briefly, I pushed myself out of the bed and pulled on my pants. I sat for a moment or so on the side of the bed, before getting up and heading towards the door to leave the room. I headed for the bathroom, going inside and quietly shutting the door. I slipped off my pants again and inspected myself a little, feeling a bit sore and worried now that I had Dib's fluids inside of me. Looking towards the sink I realised that if I used the water, I would just burn. So instead, I grabbed some toilet paper and cleaned around my thighs up a little, cringing. I pulled back up my pants before exiting the room, only to come face to face with a floating robot drone. I let out a choked yelp before ducking back into the bathroom out of sight. I'd left my disguise in the Dib's bedroom.

I heard the drone hover outside of the door for a brief moment or so, and I cringed on the floor, hoping to Irk it wouldn't float into the bathroom. Thankfully it didn't and I heard it go to Dib's bedroom. A few moments later there was a loud shout from the Dib and my antennae perked. I could hear the Dib addressing the drone, but I had no idea what was going on. Thankfully the drone left a few more minutes later and I peered around the doorframe to see it head down the stairs and exit the Membrane household. Standing up, I darted from the bathroom and back to the Dib. He looked at me as I entered.

"Dad's coming home. That was his assistant telling me to have dinner ready for him."

"Dinner? You have to make dinner for your parental unit?"

Dib just sighed. "I'd rather not, obviously," he told me, pulling on his pants and shirt. "But I'd rather not get a two hour lecture from him about the importance of respect."

I nodded. Dib seemed to stare at me for a moment or so, and I perked my antennae.

"What…?" I questioned him. "Why do you stare at Zim?"

He didn't answer me, instead getting up and coming over to me. I looked up at him and our eyes locked. His gaze was intense. A few seconds later he put a hand to my cheek before leaning down and pressing his lips to mine. I let out a gentle sigh, before he pulled back, ending the brief kiss.

"Zim…"

I gave him a smile, and he took my hand, placing my contacts into it.

"Dad could walk in any moment…"

I nodded, put the irritable lenses in, before picking up my head covery from the floor and placing it over my head.

As we walked downstairs, Dib looked up towards my head as I yawned slightly. I gave him a questioning glimpse.

"How's the gash on the back of your head?" he asked me, as we entered the kitchen. I pulled out a chair and sat down.

"Much better," I told him. "No longer hurts Zim. It is healing."

He nodded. "Great! Now, I wonder what dad will eat…"

Dib mused to himself for a little while, and I sat watching him in interest as he moved about the kitchen, turning on and off different appliances and pulling out different kinds of foods from the fridge. While the Dib-father wasn't home, I took off my head covery and placed it on the table. Occasionally Dib would look towards me, but when he started to make a habit of it, I frowned at him, before pointing a finger towards his large head.

"HYOOMAN! STOP STARING AT ZIM!" I commanded loudly, tilting my head back.

He laughed a little. "S-sorry Zim…"

"What are you looking at?" I raised an eye at him.

"Nothing… I just think it's kinda cute how you keep twitching those antennae of yours. Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why do you twitch them that way?"

"Eh?"

"You know… like this!" he raised his hands to his head and twitched two upright fingers back and forth. I snorted at how stupid he looked. Silly human.

"I am listening to you." I told him. I wondered why he was so interested in them. It was really weird, even for the Dib. I tilted my head at him a little.

"But why do they twitch like that?"

"Eh…. vibrations." I replied. I didn't know how to explain it to him, but I tried to. "Some of the noises you make… you emit a certain frequency. A higher soundwave to that of humans for us Irkens. Like… your earth dog creatures. They can hear better than you, yes? Irkens are the same. I am picking up sounds you don't… when you make a higher pitched noise… like a bang… they are sensitive. Pick it up. Can drive Zim mental."

Dib looked at me a little confused, before he nodded. "Ha! That's pretty awesome Zim," he smiled. "So do all Irkens have antennae?"

I nodded.

"Why do you look like that?" he asked me, as he drew long noodle-like things from a package and put them into a bowl.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Well… you remind me of a bug. No pupils… big eyes, antennae… claws."

I shrugged. "I dunno. My species evolved that way, like you evolved the way you are. Primitive."

Dib cast me a 'look' but sighed. "You're right about being superior."

"So I am." I grinned.

"What do you see Zim?"

What was with him and all these probe-y questions?

"You."

He shook his head. "I know that Zim! But what kind of vision do you have?"

"Eh… Zim sees much. Like whole kitchen. I can see all of it, without looking to the side, like you do. Not behind me, but around." I gestured with my arms.

"Do you see in colour?"

I nodded. "Yes. Far more than what you would see. Irken ocular implants pick up colours human eyes cannot. Zim can also see in the dark."

Dib looked quite jelly. "Does it get annoying only having three fingers?" he asked, flexing his four at me.

"Not really."

"Oh."

It went silent for a bit. During that time Dib continued to prepare the meal for his parental unit. I put my head covery back on, and put my chin into my hand. Dib was such a curious human. But he'd been that way pretty much since we were younger. I could still remember him as an eleven year old. Always trying to capture me, take pictures of me… take my disguise off. Ugh… well, at least now he wasn't annoying as he used to be. Maybe he was just asking me all these questions because we'd been enemies and couldn't ask me before. But, I didn't mind him asking. I was quite curious about him. Like that hair he had on his head… all humans had it and I wondered why. Irken's didn't have it. Maybe it was like a blanket for his big head, to keep it nice and warm. Or maybe it kept his brains at a certain temperature to keep him from thinking stupid thoughts. That scythe thing on his head was unique. It looked like his parental units.

I was about to get up to grab his head and feel it, when there was a loud bang as the front door to the residence shut. I heard footsteps before the Membrane human appeared.

"Hello son. Good to see you getting dinner on."

He proceeded forward a little, and spotted me. He stared. "Oh, you're little foreign friend is here. Well, I can't call you little anymore. You've gotten taller."

I gave him a sheepish grin. "Yes."

"Zim, wasn't it?"

I nodded again. "Ah well, good to see you two getting along. No more talk of aliens, or insane things then?"

I could sense a major change in Dib's mood as that comment came about.

"No." Dib replied to his father, a little more forced than usual.

"That's my normal boy! Maybe you are finally accepting the allure of real science! I knew you would, son."

"No way dad. I'm still going to be a paranormal investigator."

Membrane just sighed. "Ah well… bring dinner to the lab when you're ready."

The Dib-parent left the room. I watched him before turning to back to Dib. He was clenching the kitchen counter. I stood up hesitantly and approached him, wrapping my arms around him from behind. This seemed to calm him, and I felt him loosen up a little. He sighed.

I looked up at his hair. While he had his back turned, I reached up and groped it, squeezing clumps of it in my grasp. Dib let out a screech. "ZIM! What are you doing?"

I continued to tug it, before pushing him down and licking some it, before trying to eat it. I started to choke slightly as it caught in my throat, and my PAK shocked me after a moment or so, vaporizing the hair in my throat. Bad idea.

Dib had pulled away from me and was rubbing his head. He gave me a weird look. "Zim, what the hell? Did you just try to EAT my hair?"

"Eh…" I grinned. "I wanted to taste it."

He raised an eyebrow at me. "Um…. well, I should take this to dad. Stay there, for goodness sake."

He just shook his head at me and picked up the dinner for his parental unit, exiting the kitchen. I sighed and sat down again. How boring. Hair did nothing. It was weird how the humans had it. It was unsightful and messy. It didn't taste nice either. I still liked the Dib's hair though; it was interesting to look at. It was even more interesting to pull it, because Dib reacted in strange ways.

Sometimes he'd screech, other times he'd yell. I let out a sigh, feeling a slight cramp in my belly.

I looked out the window at the rain as I waited for the human to come back.


	25. A Shock For Space Boy

**A/n:**

Sorry for the long wait. This chapter is quite long and should make up for it :]  
Thank you for the reviews. I may as well say that yes, this will eventually be a m-preg ZADR.

**Warning: Nudity and suggestive themes are contained in this chapter. Turn back now anti-ZADR's.**

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**Chapter 25**

Dib's P.O.V

My father really irritated me to no end sometimes.

This wasn't the first time he'd just come home out of the blue. He'd done it quite a few times in the past, and one of those times he had actually expected me to prepare an entire roast dinner for his lab assistants when I was trying to look after a sick Gaz. It really showed how much he actually cared about me or my sister. If Gaz or I were to die, I honestly think he wouldn't notice, let alone care.

I'd given him the stupid meal and left. No thanks. No 'how are you son?' just a cold grunt of approval towards me. What a ba-

I sighed. I really didn't like to use horrible names towards my father, but he was a jerk.

No doubt about that.

Zim was still waiting for me in the kitchen when I returned, just gazing almost solemnly out towards the rain. I saw him perk a little at my presence, but he didn't look towards me.

"Looks like you're stuck here, huh?" I said to him. He looked at me out the corner of his eye.

"Not that I wouldn't like to be," he replied. "I just hope GIR and Minimoose are okay. I haven't been to the base as much."

I nodded. Zim spent most of his time with me now.

"Well, thanks to dad unexpectedly coming home, I kind of feel like our nights been ruined..." I said grudgingly. I'd been really looking forward to spending the night alone with Zim.

"It's not ruined, Dib-pet. We could always go to my house."

"But what about GIR and Minimoose? I... well, would like to– _ya_ know. But it just feels strange with others around."

"You would like more of this 'sex' with Zim, Dib-pet?" he asked blatantly. I blushed.

"Well…"

"I can always send them out. Or lock them in a room in the base."

"Okay. But, it's raining…"

"We don't have to leave yet," the Irken replied. "Why don't we go up to your base?"  
"Bedroom?"

"Yes, that area," he muttered. "Zim knew that."

I shrugged. I highly doubted that.

I led him back upstairs to my bedroom. Once I'd shut and made sure to lock the door, Zim removed his wig and contacts, tossing them aside. I could tell how much he hated wearing the disguise. I watched intrigued as his antennae slinked up.

Zim plomped himself down onto my bed, and I joined him, pulling him into my arms and glomping him. He let out a shriek but started to laugh. We lay side by side on my bed.

"Don't you find it odd, Dib?"

"What?" I asked, propping myself up onto an elbow and looking at my beautiful alien.

"You are hyooman. I am Irken. Yet, there is this love between us. Where I come from, that would be forbidden. To mate with another species, let alone share this 'love.' Does it not apply on Earth?"

"Of course it does, Zim. But like I give a shit about what anybody else thinks. Then again, nobody has to even know. But, I know for sure I love you. I always have, I just never wanted to admit it to myself… that I was gay…"

"Gay?" he asked me.

"Well… when a male loves another male. It's taboo and it's looked down upon. Most people that are gay are treated as outcasts. I don't think that's very fair. Love isn't a crime. If a girl loves another girl, or a guy loves a guy, shouldn't they also be allowed to be happy? If that's what they want?"

Zim shrugged. "I really do not know, but if you say so then I agree with you. Where I come from, there is no 'love.'"

"What do you mean by 'you don't know?'" I asked him.

"I find it a hard concept to understand. I find hyoomans hard to understand. As I said, there is none of this 'love' on Irk. We are neutral. Irkens do not have feelings. If they do, they are defective. Like me."

I felt my heart sink slightly as he said that.

"Zim?" he looked at me.

"What is it like where you come from? Like… what are Irkens like?"

"My people are cold, and relentless Dib. You would not survive for two seconds on Irk without being captured or killed. We are raised solely for one purpose, and that is to conquer. We believe in unity between our people, whereas your species is diverse. By unity I mean we are all here for the same reason. You hyoomans come in many shapes and sizes. No two hyoomans are alike. Well, except for those humans that come in pairs (I think he meant identical twins). You don't agree on things the way we do. If we get an order from the Tallest, we have to obey it, even if we die for it."

I lay back down and looked at him, my head resting on my pillow. He continued on.

"Irkens are soldiers, Dib. Invaders. We are all treated the same. If one Irken is taller than another, they are given more respect. Because we live in space – gravity is heavy. We do not grow, and if we do, that is considered as rare. I would be considered tall where I come from. In fact, possibly one of the tallest Irkens with the exception of the Tallest, but since I am no longer welcomed by my people, it doesn't matter."

I gave him a heart-felt smile. He closed his eyes.

"Our PAK's eliminate anything we might feel – like love, or sadness. All Irkens care about are themselves. That's how we are raised. No two Irkens are friends. And that's the way it's always been on Irk. Mating was eliminitated out to stop Irkens developing 'feelings' because it would just hinder or possibly halt or stop us from reaching our objective. And because mating was eliminated, cloning was introduced. So, whereas hyoomans are different from each other, you will find identical Irkens. We all look the same, although our appearances might be slightly different. "

I was amazed at how much Zim was telling me, but at the same time, I wanted to hear more. It was incredible! I was learning so many things I'd never even knew about!

I asked him about his planet and what that was like.

"Well, Earth is very colourful. Irk is nothing like it. There are many buildings, all the same colour. Everything is monotone, like all of us are. We have hovercrafts and cruisers for transport, though most of the higher-ranking Irkens live aboard the Massive. We travel throughout space to conquer. That's about it really. Most Irkens live off Irk, or go to Devastis to train for a certain number of years. "

"Where did you live?"

"On Irk. I had a standard base there. Irken smeets are assigned bases, with a computer that provides some care until we are old enough to leave. My computers been with me since I was a smeet."

Smeet. I had a feeling I knew what that meant but wanted to hear it from Zim.

"Is a smeet like a baby?"

"Yes. Like your newborn hyoomans babies."

"You were a smeet?" My heart almost leapt at the thought of a baby Zim.

"Of course, Dib-pet."

I wondered if he had any pictures. Or if there was anyway I could see him as a child.

"Are you an adult, Zim?"

He shook his head. "Almost. I am same age as you, in Earth years."

"I see."

There was quite a bit of silence between us after that. I hesitated slightly, before asking another question.

"What is it like, being Irken Zim?"

"Eh?" he turned to face me, also lying down onto the pillow beside me.

"Like... being you. Being an alien. Being that way…"

He took a moment to respond and I guessed he was trying to understand what I was asking him.

"Eh, it is okay. I would not like to be anything else. I am fine being Zim. You?"

I paused. "Well... I guess I'm the same. I couldn't imagine being something, or someone else."

"Why do you humans have hair?"

I raised an eyebrow at him, thinking back to how he tried to eat mine before.

"To keep dirt and viruses out inside our bodies, like in my nose there would be microscopic hairs that keep out dirt and trap foreign particles, but also to keep us warm in a way. I guess," I scratched my head. I'd never really thought about it before. Zim seemed intrigued.

"So is that your antenna?" he asked me, pointing to my scythe-like cowlick. I laughed.

"No Zim. Humans don't have antennae. It's just hair. It doesn't do anything and I can hardly even feel it."

He reached up and ran his hand through my hair. "Such an unusual alien you are, Dib-pet."

I nearly retorted to that, then I remembered that he was right. I'd been so used to labelling him as the alien, I'd never bothered to realise that to him, I'd also be an alien.

"Heh... yeah, humans are quite plain and boring Zim."

"I find them interesting." he replied.

"I find you interesting." I replied, giving him a smirk.

I propped my self up again and looking down at him. He looked up at me from where he lay, and I reached over and removed his tunic. He'd put it back on after we'd learned that dad was coming home.

I gently pressed my hands to his skin and ran them up his chest. His skin was so soft and smooth. I couldn't feel anything. No flaws, or imperfections. Just smooth skin. I leaned forward and put my ear to his chest, wondering if he had a heart.

I couldn't hear anything at first, but then faintly, I heard something. It was nothing like the sound of a human heart-beat. More like a soft thump, then a long hum, followed by another two thumps. This repeated over and over. I wondered how his body and circulatory system actually worked.

Zim was content. He just watched me as I inspected his body and listened to his heart beating inside of his squeedily-spooch. His breathing rate was much quicker than a human's. More like that of a cat or dog. When he breathed in, I heard a strange 'click-flap' type of noise. Like there was some kind of valve inside of him that air passed though. It was hard to describe the sensation I felt. Almost like an out of world experience.

Well, for me anyway. After all, this was a living alien I was listening to and examining.

I sat up. Zim looked at me with a neutral expression, but I saw his antennae perk up in curiosity. He still said nothing to me, though. He watched me, waiting to see what I would do next.

I removed his pants, slowly bringing them down over his knees and pushing his feet out of them, before putting them down. I felt slight heat at his nude form, but I hadn't removed his pants for _that_ reason. I started to run my hand along his legs, feeling the bone structure. He had a structure similar to mine. When I pressed my hands to his hips, I felt a pelvis inside of him, but it was more like that of a female's, which explained Zim's curves. Most likely because of the fact male and female Irkens could bear offsping. I wondered if Zim had organs similar to a woman's. Or maybe there was some kind of pouch in his squeedily-spooch where the smeet developed. So many questions...

I peeked at that small slit between the Irken's legs. It was hardly noticeable. You would think he was a mule just looking at him from a distance. Zim looked a bit uncomfortable, but still didn't say anything to me. Cautiously I traced a finger along there, and he squirmed a little.

"Zim? Do you uh... ever use the bathroom?" I asked, VERY awkwardly.

He nodded. "You are not going to ask of that, are you?"

I shook my head. "No, even I know that's going over the line."

He just looked at me. I couldn't tell if he was embarrassed or not as he still had a neutral expression.

"I'm sorry if I'm making you uncomfortable. I just think... you're... well... amazing. Your body is really uh... nice."

"Yes. I am Zim, after all."

I rolled my eyes. A moment or so later, he sat up, and pushed me back down. I looked up at him, wondering what he was doing. Soon enough, I got my answer.

"My turn."

I swallowed a little, distant memories of being afraid of aliens and being experimented upon blossoming up somewhere from the depths of my subconsciousness, but I told myself that this was Zim, and he loved me. He wasn't like other aliens.

Zim removed my shirt and started to explore my chest. He'd already had his gloves off, so I drew in a gasp at the feeling of those talons against my skin. They were sharp, but Zim didn't push hard enough to cut or hurt me, and I was thankful for that. I felt him run a talon over my nipple, before circling my naval.

"Why do you have these things?" he asked me.

"Well, I just do. The circle thing on my stomach is from an umbilical cord… we get fed through them when we are developing in our mothers wombs."

"So that holey thing had a tube attached to it?"

"Yeah, basically."

"Where is the tube?"

I snorted a little. "Well, when babies are born, the placenta and umbilical cord also come out with the baby. The umbilical cord is cut off and the part that's attached to the baby just dies off from lack of blood supply and eventually falls of, leaving a belly-button."

"This thing?" Zim poked at my stomach.

"Yeah. I see you don't have one."

Zim shook his head. "I was created, Dib. Not born."

I nodded, watching him as he continued to explore, running his hands over some of my scars from previous battles with him. He didn't say anything but his forlorn expression as he saw them all over my body told me he was regretful, or possibly even guilty, of them.

He continued to my pants, which he slid down and did the same to me as I did to him, exploring my groin and nether regions. I blushed.

He didn't say anything, but he did ask me what a female was like compared to me. I told him that they were kind of like him. It was a really awkward situation for both of us, but in the end I figured it would no doubt bring us closer and help us understand each other more.

When he was finished, he pulled back on his pants, and I pulled mine back up as we lay side by side again. This time I held him in my arms again. I was glad that dad was down in the lab and my door was locked. I'd feel much more comfortable doing this with Zim with nobody home. Zim sniffled a little beneath me and I rested my chin between his antennae.

"Zim? I need to talk to you about something."

"Eh?" he asked.

"Well... remember how I filled you with that 'gooey' stuff?"

"Yes?"

"Well, that gooey stuff is not just gooey stuff Zim. It has... uh, what we call 'sperm' in it. In a human female, the sperm enter the body and find an egg. If a sperm gets through and the egg if fertilized, a baby will start to develop."

"Yes...?"

I sighed. "Zim, as you told me all Irken's are capable of bearing smeets, there is a chance that, well, you could fall pregnant. With a smeet."

Zim jerked up out of my grasp. "Zim could bear smeet?"

I nodded sheepishly. He looked shocked. "What happens then?"

"Well... we'd become parents, I guess. A family. You WOULD keep it, right? After all, it would be... be our child." I looked up, kind of spaced out as I said that last part.

Zim was quiet. "I don't know. I guess so. I've never raised a smeet before, let alone had one."

"Well, I raised Gaz because dad was never around, so I have experience at raising a child, but still..."

Zim sighed.

"Listen Zim, no matter what happens, I'll always be there for you, and the smeet... if it ever comes to that."

He looked at me.

"I love you."

Zim gave me a small smile. "I love you too, Dib-pet."

"Good."

I kissed him on the head, before we lay again and waited for the rain to ease off.


	26. I'm Alright, At Least So Far

**A/n: **Sorry for the delay. As for the twelve year old reviewer I had reading this, I'm curious, why are you reading this? Bit young, aren't you? XD What is the world coming to? When I was twelve, I was drawing Stitch and playing with dolls. Aye.. (I don't mean this in a bad way, but there are other things you should be doing than reading adult fanfiction lol) If you hadn't of told me your age, I wouldn't be telling you this XD

I think kids should have more restrictions when being on the internet. But that's my opinion. I have no problem _who _reads this, adult or kid, but still, this story isn't exactly for kids to be looking at. XP

**Anyway, I hope you like this chapter, faithful reviewers.**

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**Chapter 26**

Dib's P.O.V

Zim seemed sort of anxious the following Monday morning. I realised it was because it was the day he was supposed to meet Mr. Elliott. I could tell he wasn't looking forward to it from the way he kept banging his head against my shoulder, grunting about how stupid the teacher was.

I agreed with him, hoping to make him feel a little bit better, at least.

"What are you going to do?" I asked my boyfriend once we reached the Skool grounds. "Are the roboparents coming?"

He nodded. "I've reprogrammed them and had them sit through seven hours of parenting videos. And this time I made sure GIR was locked in the storage room."

"Well, I got in contact with some of dad's assistants just in case. They will be on standby."

He grunted in approval. I reached up and pushed aside his wig to graze along an antenna. I felt it perk against my finger, and Zim turned to face me.

"You'll be fine Zim."

"Easy for you to say, hyooman."

I looked away slightly, taking my hand away from the Irken's head. He readjusted his wig.

"I will see you in class, Dib."

I watched him as he walked away from me, before sighing and heading for homeroom. I couldn't tell if he was just annoyed from the fact he had to see Elliott, or if he was just in a bad mood in general. He'd been so enthusiastic and happy yesterday when we were at my house. I hated a grumpy Zim.

Well, I was somewhat used to the alien's mood shifts, having put up with them since we were kids, but now that Zim was close to me, I hated seeing him angry, especially when some of it was directed towards me. I kept telling myself he loved me as much as I loved him, but I did keep in mind that Zim was a completely different species to me as well. He came from a distant planet. He wasn't in any way a human, apart from some of his emotions. The way he loved, and felt about me was no doubt different to the way I felt about him. It had to be!

I ignored the various taunts directed my way as I headed to my desk after entering the classroom. I just wanted to be left alone. Placing my head into my arms, I closed my eyes and blocked everybody out with my MP3.

For a moment or so, I wondered. Wondered what Irk must be like. What it must be like to live under constant rule. Wondered what it would be like to come from a species that was identical and only lived to serve one purpose.

For a moment I also wondered what it would be like to be an Irken. I'd wondered that a few days after I first laid eyes on Zim. It was one of those occasional thoughts. Zim was lucky not to be human. Not that I hated being human exactly, but I hated my species as a whole. Zim was free from the flaws and imperfections of humanity. Sure, he came from a species bent on domination, but at least his species didn't wage wars among themselves and kill each other.

Lucky bastard.

There was no denying that I envied him. I envied virtually everything about him, from his culture, to his upbringing, to the very features of his body. He was my obsession. He was everything I was not. He was my image of perfection. He was something I could never be.

I barely registered the bell ring for first class. I groaned. Geography.

Grabbing my books, I left the classroom and walked down the corridor. Looks like Zim's class hadn't left the room yet. But then I spotted him, around the corner and heading towards the Gym. He had Phys Ed first up. I called out to him, and he turned slightly. We stared at each other, before he turned to leave. I stood and watched him go, before sighing and trudging to class.

I hated when I couldn't read him.

Geography was the same as it always has been. The only thing on my mind was Zim. Thankfully my teacher for this class couldn't care less if we paid attention or not. In the past, I would usually preoccupy myself by drawing random doodles of Zim on my notes. Or small, strange looking aliens in flying saucers. I wasn't much of an artist, but I'd found that I did have a small passion for drawing. It helped express what I could not put into words.

I flipped to the back of my notebook and felt the air drain out of me as my eyes travelled down the page to a small drawing of Zim screaming in pain on an autopsy table, his flesh peeled back to reveal vital organs being probed and cut into. I was the one performing the autopsy. I traced a finger over the tears flowing from the alien's eyes.

No. No. No, no no. I ripped out the page forcefully and scrunched it up before ripping it up into shreds.

"FUCK. NO. NEVER. NEVER AGAIN!"

I paid no mind to the fact that the other students stared at me and called me various names. They didn't exist to me. The teacher continued on with the lesson, ignoring my little outburst. Screw them all; they would never understand the way I felt. Zim wasn't the monster, I was.

I flumped against my desk once satisfied that he picture was a monument of the past. I flicked small shreds of paper off my desk and onto the floor. I closed my eyes and blocked out everybody else. The lesson, the teacher. None of them mattered to me. Only Zim did.

I was almost like a zombie by the time the lesson ended. Zim was the puppeteer, and I was the puppet. I felt the strings attached to my body tugging, pulling my limbs in all sorts of directions. I stood outside the doors of the gymnasium after walking down the corridor, pulling out my earphones and putting my MP3 away into my pocket. The students filed out, but he wasn't among them.

I pushed open the doors and entered the building, standing at the entrance. I couldn't see him.

Where are you? I thought. Where is my puppeteer?

And then I spotted him. Lagging behind as usual, taking as much time as he could. I set my jaw firm and walked over to him. He spotted me only as I started pushing him back towards the wall. He barely got my name out as I pushed my mouth to his. I didn't care who saw us. I didn't care what anybody thought. Zim was tense, but then finally relaxed, and I felt him return the kiss. He pushed me back, looking at me with wide eyes.

"What are you doing? What is the meaning of this?"

I stared at him. "I need you."

"I need you too, Dib-pet, but I don't need the attention you are bringing!"

I turned my head slightly and noticed a group of students watching us, looking disgusted. I flipped them the finger, before grabbing Zim by the arm and dragging him to the change rooms. He struggled against me at the sudden force. I pushed him into the same cubicle and shut the door behind us, locking it, before cornering him against the wall. I peered deeply into those eyes.

He stared back at me from vibrant purple contacts.

"Tell me…" I whispered. "What is it like…"

"What is what like?" he spoke back, just as quiet.

"Not being from a flawed race. Being, perfect."

He raised an eyebrow at me. "Eh? What nonsense is this coming out of your smelly corn filled mouth?"

I pinned both arms on each side of him, trapping him. "Don't you understand, space-boy? Don't you understand how lucky you are? You are the definition of perfection, Zim. You are everything I want, everything I've ever _needed_."

He looked so confused. "I'm not perfect, Dib. If I was, I wouldn't be here right now."

"You are perfect to me, Zim. You are free from the restrictions I have. You have no idea how much I envy you. How I wish I could see things from your perspective."

He shook his head. "But you are unique as well, Dib. You are not like the rest of them."

"I want to be like _you._"

"What do you mean?"

I looked the side slightly. "Free."

He pushed me back slightly. "And just how exactly am I free, Dib? I'm restricted. I'm defective. That's not something I can ever be free from. I'm not perfect, Dib. I have flaws."

I shook my head. "No, not to me."

He shifted slightly, pulling up and arm and taking off a glove, before pressing his three fingers against my cheek. I raised my hand and put it over his.

"Dib… my blood runs warm. Cut me, I'll bleed. I'm not the perfect being you seem to be envisioning. I am an outcast. I feel pain. My blood should be cold, and I shouldn't feel pain. I shouldn't feel love for you, but I do. And, I would never change that, not even if I was accepted back into the Empire."

I stared into his eyes.

"If I was perfect, Dib, I wouldn't be Zim."

He pressed his hand against my cheek a little harder, tilting his head slightly as he waited for my response.

I couldn't help it; I reached up my free hand and placed it against the corner of his contact, digging my fingers around until I felt a small groove, and pulled it out of his eye. A large, magenta orb stared back at me. Zim was unusual to look at with one contact in. It was hard to tell where he was looking because his natural eyes were pupiless. At least with the contact in, I had some idea of where his gaze was directed. He was looking directly at me now, though, a penetrating gaze which burned an image deep into my mind.

"Your eyes…" I muttered.

"What about them?" he asked, a moment or so later.

I shook my head. "All I see is infinity."

"When you look at me?" he questioned, and I nodded. "Why is that?"

"I've never seen eyes like that until I met you, Zim."

"Well, I've never seen eyes like yours before either, Dib-pet."

"You're incredible Zim… why don't you see that? Why doesn't _anybody _see that?"

He tilted his head back to an upright position, before giving me a tiny smile.

"You see it, Dib."

I went quiet at that. He stared at me, and for the longest time I stared back at him. I drew him close to me, pressing his body against mine.

"We're going to be late for class." he muttered against my chest.

"Who gives a damn?"

I didn't care about class. I was only focused on the one being in front of me. The one being that had taken my life and made it that much better. The one being that had made my life worth living. I didn't care where I was or what happened to me.

Because as long as I was with him, I would be happiest.


	27. A Terrifying Close Encounter

**A/n:**Things start to pick up a little here. Never take anybody by face value - as Zim learns in this chapter. Enjoy!

For some recent reviews: Yes, this story is intended for 18 years and over. I was going to give it an MA+ rating, but the rating system only went as far as M. I have no problem if you're reading this at an age younger than 15, but if you were my kids, I wouldn't be happy about it. :]

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**Chapter 27**

Zim's P.O.V

It was hard for me to concentrate for the rest of the day, especially after what the Dib had done to me before. To be honest, I hadn't expected him to do that at all, and I wondered what had triggered it. The human was usually much more reserved, although it _had _been awesome to see him flip the finger towards our skoolmates. I snorted slightly at the memory. Perhaps the human was finally coming out of his Dib-shell.

I stared up at the clock, and for once in my life I wished the day would go slower than faster. It was already twenty minutes until the end of the day, and I would have to meet that miserable, annoying prat of a human. I only hoped that the roboparents had arrived already and were hiding where I'd instructed them to do so.

Dib watched me as I stood up and approached the teacher, asking if I could leave early. I had no choice; I_ had _to make sure mom and dad were there, otherwise the stupid Elliot creature would no doubt be further on my case. He' already come close enough to discovering I wasn't human, and I didn't want that to happen again. Thankfully the teacher let me leave after I told her I had a meeting, and I stepped out of the classroom, casting a small glimpse back towards the big-headed boy. Our eyes met, before I pulled my gaze away and headed out into the corridor. Looking around, I made sure I wasn't being followed as I headed down towards the janitors closet opposite the Boiler Room.

Arriving there, I instantly had to duck out of view as a teacher passed me. The area was out of bounds to students, and if I was caught down here I risked detention. Swallowing slightly, I darted out towards the closet and opened up the door, going inside. I could feel my squeedily-spooch lurch slightly as I looked around, not seeing mom and dad anywhere, when I jumped at a voice above me.

"Hello sweetheart… did you remember to bring the dishwashing liquid?"

I let out a sigh. No mistaking that voice. I looked up to see my 'parents' clinging to the ceiling. They both lowered down, and dad picked me up, almost crushing my skull.

"Good little green boy-son. Now we can spend real family time together!"

"Look dad, I found a mop!" mom said, proceeding to belt my father in the face with it and 'clean' him.

"You forgot the dishwashing liquid mom!"

"MOM!" I hissed. "We don't have time for this, we have to go!"

"Now, wait your turn son! That's bad manners."

Rolling my eyes, I grabbed them both by the arms and dragged them out of the closet.

"BEHAVE. Do _everything _I instructed you." I hissed at them, trying to look as normal as possible as we headed down the corridor towards the Elliot-human's office.

Looking at my parents and letting out a sigh, I raised my hand up and knocked on the door.

Please, please PLEASE let this go okay. I thought.

The office door opened and I nearly gagged at the sight of the human.

"Zim. Come on in," he greeted me, pointing to three chairs opposite his desk. "Take a seat."

I dragged my parents in and forced each of them to sit on the chairs, afterwards sitting down in the middle of them. I gave the stupid human a large grin.

"Mr. and Mrs.… eh…" he trailed off looking confused.

"I'm mom!" mom said, before pointing to herself. "Call me mom!"

"And I'm dad!" dad also said. "Call her mom and call me dad." I wanted to bury my face into my hands.

"Alright…" Elliot looked confused, but smiled regardless. "Hello Mr. and Mrs. Dad. I'm Mr. Elliot, your son's homeroom teacher."

"Oh yes, son has mentioned you quite a few times."

"ZIM!" I hissed.

"Yes son?"

"No dad, my name is Zim!"

"I know son!"

I let out an agitated groan. Elliot looked at me, before clearing his throat.

"Anyway, I called you both here today to discuss Zim's welfare. I'm concerned he is being bullied because of his… differences."

I swallowed slightly.

"Aww, poor wittle boy. Are you being buwwied sweetie?"

What? I raised an eye ridge towards my mother.

"Yes, I believe he is. He's very distant from the other students, and never interacts in any class activities. Tell tale signs of bullying. I was wondering if you two were aware of this?"

Both of my parents stared at the human.

"I guess not," he said, frowning, before looking at me. "Come here Zim."

I felt my squeedily-spooch flip. "Why?"

"Just come around here."

Biting my lower lip with my teeth, I stood up from my chair and slowly walked around behind the desk to face the man. He looked at me, before gesturing me to come closer. I took a step forward slowly, maintaining my distance. He reached out towards me and I felt him grasp my hand, starting to pull it forward. By now, I was perspiring.

"What are you _doing?" _I hissed at him.

"Relax, I'm not going to hurt you…" he responded, and I realised he was removing my glove. My heart started to pound. Slowly he slipped it off and my hand was exposed. I could see his eyes widening slightly as he inspected my hand, flipping it over and looking at my three claws.

"Zim… can you explain to me why you only have three fingers?" he mumbled, and I felt my heart almost stop. I _knew _this fool hadn't arranged to meet me about being bullied! He was suspicious of me! Irk damn it!

"I… uh…" I stumbled, racking my brain for an answer. "Accident when I was three. One of the fingers on each of my hands was severed."

"Human's don't have claws, Zim."

"Really sharp nails… I don't cut them…" I drew out, my voice barely above a whisper.

Elliot pushed my glove back on, giving me a strange look, before turning to my parents.

"Mr. and Mrs. Dad, can you explain to me what exactly your son's medical condition is?"

"It's a secret!" mom cooed, pulling out a spoon and starting to tap her eye with it. My breath caught in my throat."

"Why is that? Hasn't it ever been diagnosed?" Elliot still looked suspicious.

"I think so?" dad responded, now helping mom bang her eye with another spoon. I knew those parenting videos didn't work; I was on my own.

"Right…" Elliot said, looking back at me. "Your parents seem, rather strange, Zim."

"They have ADHD." I grinned, hoping he'd buy it. He just shrugged.

"Well, I'm a little confused. Your parents have normal skin. Why is yours so green?"

"It's a skin condition." I hissed through gritted teeth.

"Do you get bullied because of your differences often, Zim?"

"Of course I do. You humans pick on anything you don't understand. You belittle anybody that's not the same as you. That's _different. _Because it's in your _nature._"

"But you're a human too, Zim, so why do you speak of your own kind that way?"

I shut my mouth. Elliot stared at me.

"You're right about that though."

"Of course I am."

He nodded. "Does it hurt, being bullied?"

"What do you think?" was he stupid, or something?

Elliot nodded. "Of course it hurts to be bullied. I was bullied when I was your age. I became a teacher because I wanted to _help _students like you Zim. I wanted to make a difference and prevent other kids going through what I went through, because I know how terrible it feels."

"Then what exactly does this have to do with my medical condition?" I sneered, distracted for a moment when my parents started to sing nursery rhymes. Elliot gave me a strange look, but ignored them.

"I've never seen a student unique as you before, Zim."

"So?" I retorted. "Why don't you stop picking on me and pick on somebody else then? Zim does _NOT _need or want your annoying questiony-ness."

"See, you're doing it again!" Elliot said, standing up and approaching me. "Why do you do that?"

"Why do I do what?" I snapped, taking a few steps back.

"Speak of yourself like that. You always call yourself by your name, and not 'I'"

"Eh?" I honestly had no idea what he was talking about.

Elliot sighed. "Zim. I know that you're hiding something. I've been observing you since grade skool, even if I was never your teacher. The way young Gazaline would sometimes refer to you, it was unusual."

Gazaline? The Dib-sister? I felt myself start to quiver slightly.

"I told you." I spoke slowly. "It's a medical condition."

Elliot was coming closer to me now. I backed up slightly, until I felt the office wall behind me.

"So a 'medical condition' is the reason you only have three fingers on each hand, claws instead of nails, green skin, no ears and no nose? Not to mention your unusual serrated teeth and serpentine tongue?"

"YES! IT IS!" I shouted. "NOW LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"Calm down Zim!" the stupid human said quickly, trying to shut me up. I jerked away from him as he took my hand, but his grip was strong.

"I think there is more to this 'medical condition' that meets the eye, Zim. I think you're not telling me something. I think you're _hiding _something."

"No, I'm not hiding anything!" I spat at him.

"Then what is your medical condition?"

"What is it to you?" I was starting to get angry.

"Everything, you know why Zim? Because, I don't think you're a human."

My heart almost stopped. I knew then I had to get out of there and fast. I pushed past the human and grabbed mom and dad, starting to drag them towards the door.

"Aw, are we leaving already?" dad spoke, but I barely registered it, panic overtaking my body. I just wanted to get out of there. I was about to open the door when Elliot blocked the way, pushing my parents aside and trapping me. I was _disgusted_. He pinned me against the floor, holding my arms down by my sides.

"GET OFF ME!" I screamed. "GET OFF OR SUFFER THE WRATH OF ZIM!"

He didn't budge. I couldn't use my PAK legs otherwise he'd know for sure I wasn't human. I was terrified.

"Now, if you were a human Zim, you'd have no reason to panic or get away now, would you?"

I scowled up at him.

"What are you?"

"NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS YOU PITIFUL CREATURE! RELEASE ME!"

Elliot just smiled. "Not until I get an answer, Zim."

"Are you deaf, you got an answer!" I spat. "I told you already, it's a medical condition!"

"A medical condition which has never been diagnosed because it doesn't _exist._"

My breath caught in my throat. Elliot reached a hand to my forehead, and I tried to jerk my head away. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

"I've always been rather intrigued by your hair, Zim."

Geeze, this human was creepy. I tried manuvering my head so that I avoided contact with him, but the miserable creature managed to get a finger on my hairline. I felt him push it underneath, and he realised it was a wig. SHIT.

I felt him tugging at it, and I thrashed about beneath him. He pulled my wig up slowly. On reflex I pressed my antennae flat against my skull. Hopefully he'd think I was bald or something.

"What's this… you have no hair Zim?"

"SKIN CONDITION!" I screamed. Thankfully, he didn't seem to notice my antennae. Not yet, anyhow.

And then it happened. I'd never felt so relieved in all my 177 years of existence.

The office door flew open and in rushed the Dib, pushing Elliot back. The teacher fell over against the wall behind us. Dib picked me up, pushing me behind him protectively.

"I saw everything, Mr. Elliot. What the HELL were you doing? You violated Zim's privacy by even going _near_ him. I'm going to _report _you! I thought you were supposed to see him about being bullied!" Dib spat. He sounded furious.

Elliot brushed himself off, and stood up, looking nervous. "It's not what you think it was. He's hiding something!"

Dib looked ready to punch the man in the face. "That doesn't give you the right to attack Zim like that… I'm going to do everything in my power to get you fired, you happy- go-lucky ass!"

"You have no right to speak to me that way, Dibothen." Elliot responded.

"Just because you're the teacher doesn't mean a thing!" Dib spat back at him. "I saw _everything _you did to Zim!"

Dib started to push me back and out of the office. "You're going down, Elliot."

"Well see about that, Dib." Elliot responded, straightening his tie and acting as though the situation had never happened.

Sneering Dib pushed me and the roboparents out, slamming the door behind him. He picked me up into his arms, dragging mom and dad behind him, before hurrying out of the skool building. Once we were a safe distance away, he set me down, kneeling in front of me and putting his hands on my shoulders.

"Zim, did he see your antennae?"

"I'm not sure…" I responded quietly. "I… don't think so."

Dib pulled me into a hug. "Don't worry Zim. He's not going to be a problem for you, I promise. He won't be allowed back into that skool EVER again."

I could only stare back at the Dib. I hoped he was right about that. I'd underestimated Elliot in the past; he was much more sinister than he appeared to be. Perhaps his happy attitude was just a disguise. Dib looked thoughtful, before perking up slightly as though he had just realised something.

He took my hand. "Come on, you're staying with me tonight."

Nodding, I gripped his hand tightly as we started to walk back to his home, mom and dad following behind.


	28. An Unsettling Situation

**A/n: **Another long update. I'm sorry! :( I'm going to get back into this now, and hopefully get it finished in the next few weeks, or sooner. :)

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**Chapter 28**

Dib's P.O.V

It had been hard to get even just a few words out of Zim during that afternoon. He sat on our family couch, legs pulled right up against his chest, looking almost petite in appearance. Zim was naturally small, but he reminded me of an upset child after being scolded. The little alien hardly lifted his head.

He hadn't even bothered to remove his disguise.

The roboparents had been turned off for the time being. I drew the line when they'd started trying to use our washing detergent to make sundaes. Now, they lay side by side against the wall by the front entrance. I think Zim had had enough of them as well, considering they hadn't been the slightest bit of help to him just before. I was worried about his situation.

Elliott... that asshole.

I made my way over the couch with a small glass of lemonade. Zim still had his head buried into his knees. When I reached out and placed my hand onto his back, just below his PAK, and rubbed there in a circular motion, he looked up at me slightly. I was just barely able to make out a purple lens focused up at me. He seemed to have a thing for me rubbing that particular area of his back, and usually it calmed him.

I must have been calming him in a good way then, because he drew in a sigh, and rested against my chest. I wrapped an arm around him.

"Try not to worry about it too much..."

He remained quiet for a while, before finally answering me, after taking a drink of lemonade.

"He knows. What am I going to do?"

"You know I'll be there to protect you."

I swallowed after I said that. I hoped I could keep true to my word. The thought of my evidence of Zim stashed away down in dad's lab crossed my mind, as well as my current situation with the Swollen Eyeball's. I'd been keeping tabs on my email, but there hadn't been anything. I knew how the Eyeball's worked though – silence was never a good thing, especially from an organization such as theirs.

And why the hell was Elliott like this all of a sudden? Both Zim and I had gone through the entire of elementary skool with him in our presence and not once had he questioned Zim in such a manner. It was unusual. Zim had said to me when we'd got back to my house about how Elliott was more cunning than he looked. I had to agree there. I'd underestimated him in the past because of his stupidly sugary personality. There actually was more to Elliott than picnics in the park surrounded by flowers and bees. I wondered just how much more.

Right now, the only thing I was worried about was taking Zim's mind off the situation. I knew it would be hard, but I smirked a little as a few devious thoughts crossed my mind. I stood up, facing the Irken, and reaching under his arms. That illicited response, and he looked up at me. I lifted him up into my arms.

"Where are we going?" he asked me once his feet lifted from the ground. Zim barely came up to my shoulder, but he was as light as a toothpick to pick up. I felt him wrap two small arms around my neck.

"To make you feel better." I responded, carrying him out of the living room and towards the stairs. I jumped about a foot the moment I stepped onto the bottom stair, when the front door slammed shut. I turned to find Gaz standing in the entrance, Zim also peering to look from my shoulder.

She was giving us a queer look.

"What the hell are you doing with Zim?" she asked, not even bothering to look at us as she threw down her bookbag.

"Carrying him, obviously." I responded.

"I can see that. I want to know why." She paused. "On second thought, no, I don't want to know why. Just stay out of my way."

I rolled my eyes. "Like I planned on getting in your way in the first place."

I was still angry with her from last week, even if she was my sister. For years I'd put up with her slander and abuse towards me, so now I didn't really care how she reacted to me giving her retaliation. Turning my back to her, I carried the little alien upstairs. He was silent, looking in the direction I was carrying him. We went into my bedroom, and I set him down on the edge of my bed. He returned to his crouched up position almost instantly and I felt a little disheartened.

Sitting down beside him, after locking my bedroom door, I set my hand on his thigh and rubbed gently. He closed his eyes, and I noticed him place a hand on his belly. The other hand, he slipped into my free one.

"What happened to all your hatred, Zim?" I asked after a few moments of silence. I had been curious about that for a long time.

He looked at me intently. "I don't know." he replied, the honesty all too apparent in his voice.

"We used to loathe each other. Then you hit your head, I help you, and now here we are."

"I know," he nodded. "Zim still finds it hard to comprehend."

I nodded. "I wouldn't change it, for anything."

"Neither would I, Dib-pet. I am glad we see eye to eye."

"What about your mission? Your life's worth? It's all gone… are you really just okay with that?"

He gave me a slight glare. "Of course not. My leaders hated me all along and I never knew it. Perhaps I was just too blind to notice."

"No." I shook my head. "Your leaders are selfish, ignorant fucks that only care about food and getting their own way. You thought too much of them, Zim."

He growled. "They were my leaders, Dib. I respected them. I had to. The Empire was I all know. It still is all I know. All Irken's need somebody, or something, to look up to."

I gave him a gentle smile. "But as I said before, that's gone now Zim. You are here now, and you have to realise that you're never going to go back to the life you had once before. I think the reason your hatred seems to have died off is because you are beginning to accept it. No matter how much you tell me otherwise, I know that you have no desire for revenge against your leaders. I've seen the real you over the past few days, Zim. The one buried away for so many years."

He stared at me. "...And?"

"And it's just made me love you even more." I shrugged. "You're incredible. You always told me that, but now I see it for myself."

He looked down towards my carpet, but I saw the subtle change in his expression. What I had just told him was getting through to him. He didn't need such a huge ego to be respected. Well, by me at least. I remembered back to what he had told me before.

_If I was perfect, Dib, I wouldn't be Zim._

There was more silence between us. I could just make out the sounds of the television downstairs, but paid no real attention to it. I could hear Zim breathe in and out gently as he sat beside me; the unusual rhythm of his breathing prompting me to think for a moment about how different we truly were. His eyes were still downcast. I could have sworn he looked tired. Perhaps he was.

I continued to caress his back gently. I was greeted with a tiny purr a few minutes later. I wondered what caused an Irken to purr. Zim's species reminded me of cats. It was odd that he was purring, considering I wasn't stroking his antennae. Perhaps rubbing has back had the same sort of effect.

It was cute, none-the-less.

He stopped a little while later, and I stopped rubbing his back. He turned to look at me through dull purple lenses. I stared back at him.

"I used to know who I was. Now, I'm not so sure anymore."

I raised an eyebrow at that unusual statement. "What?"

"You heard me."

I sat myself up a little, and faced him directly, reaching out to place both hands on his shoulders.

"You are Zim. You always have been."

"But who am I Zim to, Dib?"

"Yourself," I paused for a moment. "I know the banishment is still on your mind. As I said, the Empire doesn't know what it's missing, but if you were still a part of them, I would also be missing something myself. "

"What? Victory?"

I shook my head. "No. You."

His eyes flickered downwards for a moment. He didn't say anything, but instead reached out and touched my face with his two fingers. I reached up and placed my palm on top of his hand.

"Why are you so soft?" he asked me quietly. "I always envisioned you to be hard and cold. Like you once were."

I shrugged. "Why are you?"

"..."

I gave him a small smile. He couldn't answer me. I could almost see his mind trying to work out a response to that. Finally, I got one.

"Your arms are stupid!"

I snorted. Loudly. Alien logic. Gotta love it.

He gave me his infamous 'Zim glare' but I just continued to smirk at him. He was about to go off at me, when I leaned forward and kissed him on the forehead. That shut him up.

I shut up myself a moment or so after when he licked me. That, I had not been expecting.

I felt that serpentine tongue slide up my cheek gently. I could feel the ridges of it. It wasn't an unpleasant feeling, but it wasn't exactly pleasant either. Just strange.

Alien...

Zim smirked at my reaction. I hit him gently in response. The little twat had done it on purpose. A moment or so later I had him pinned down beneath me on the bed. He tried trashing against me, but he was too small. Eventually he gave up, and just flopped down, looking up at me like a dog that had lost its bone. Our lips met a moment or so later, and he sighed against me. I settled down beside him, enclosing him into my arms as we both lay and stared up at the ceiling.

He broke the silence a little while later.

"I should head back tonight. Who knows what GIR and Minimoose have done to my beloved base?"

"Nothing too devastating, I assume."

He gave me a queer look. "Dib-pet, this is GIR and Minimoose we are talking about. Remember with all your brains?"

I smirked. "I can go with you, if you like."

He nodded. I tilted my head at him a little, causing him to give me another odd look.

"What?"

Instead of answering him, I reached to his head and removed his wig. He looked bald for a moment when I realised that he had his antennae pressed flat against the surface of his head. Huh.

"What's wrong?" I asked him, observing the unusual position. Usually he had them in the 45 degree angle and they bounced back smoothly into place once the wig was removed. Now they were rigid and barely noticeable unless you looked closely at his head.

"Eh?"

"What's wrong?" I repeated, gesturing to his skull. "Your antennae. Why are they like that?"

At that, they slinked back up slowly. Zim didn't make eye contact with me. "I was... anxious."

"About what?"

He looked directly at me. "The Elliott creature discovered my hair is a head covery. He was going to remove it. He nearly saw them."

"Oh," I said gently, realising why he had them so stiff against his head. "Well, you can relax now Zim. You're safe now."

He gave me a small nod, and the appendages settled back into place. I reached up and stroked a finger along one, causing him to emit a moan. It was hard for me not to wonder what he was feeling. Ever since we were kids, I'd been a little envious of the alien's features. One reason I'd tried to expose him so much in the past was not only just to expose him, but just to see those bizarre feelers.

Zim was watching me curiously. Probably wondering what was going through my mind. He sat up on my bed.

"I need to do something."

"Alright."

I helped him up and he jumped down from my bed. I watched him as he left the room, wondering where he was going. A moment or so later, I heard our bathroom door shut, and frowned a little. Was he going to the toilet? I remembered him telling me he did need to use the bathroom. Irken's ate and drank, just like we did, so they must have a digestive process similar to ours. I smiled.

Incredible. Zim came from light years away, and despite we were different species, there were so many aspects that made us similar. I wondered if it was the same for other alien races, like the Greys.

Zim took his time. It was almost twelve minutes when he returned. He looked a little distant as he walked in, and I reached down to pick him up and place him back on the bed beside me. I didn't have to, but he was looking so small and petite today. Something was very clearly bothering him.

"Zim, are you sure you're alright?"

He shrugged. I noticed him hold his belly again. I reached over and felt his forehead. He felt warm.

"Do you have a pain in your stomach?"

He nodded.

Resting him against me, I lifted up his tunic and massaged his belly. He hardly moved, but I saw his fists clench my bed covers.

"What do you think is causing it? Did you eat something you weren't supposed to today?"

He shook his head. "I don't know what it is. The pain…"

"Hopefully it will pass."

I continued to massage him. Gaz looked in about an hour or so later and told me that she was getting pizza for dinner again. She gave me a disgusted look at what I was doing to Zim, but didn't question it.  
"Does he want some pizza as well?"

Zim didn't answer her. I peered over to look at the alien, when I realised he'd fallen into some sort of nap.

"I'm sure it will make him sick Gaz."

"What are you doing to him?" she responded, opening my door a little further. I could see the phone in her hand. So she was curious after all. Pfft.

I glared at her. "He has a pain in his stomach. I'm trying to make him feel better."

She raised an eyebrow. "Just come down and get your pizza when it gets here."

I rolled my eyes. She shut the door and left. Zim was still in his nap beneath me. I picked up a small arm into my hand. He was so skinny and frail. I felt like I could snap his arm in half without effort. Not that I wanted to do that, of course. I picked up his glove and pulled it off gently to expose his three claws. While he napped, I inspected them gently. It was odd to see just smooth green skin and no nails. I rubbed the appendages gently, feeling the bones inside. Just like a human, save the talons on the ends. Zim made a grunt beneath me, and I enclosed his bare hand into my own.

"I love you..." I murmured into an antenna, before settling myself down against my pillow. I was unsure if he'd heard me or not.

I was conscious just long enough to pick up a soft response, before sleep over clouded my mind and I descended into darkness.

"I love you too."


	29. A Realization

**A/n:** It's been years since I updated this. I've actually long time left the Zim fandom and have little interest in the show nowdays, but I said I'd finish this story and still plan to.

**To everybody that has reviewed, thank you. **I hope you will continue to read despite being so long!

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**Chapter 29**

Zim's P.O.V

I'm not sure what time it was when I woke up, but when I did, I instantly noticed that Dib-pet was in a deep sleep beside me. Dib had tried to deny so many times in the past that he snored. Yet the only thing that filled my antennae at that moment was the loud, almost monstrous noise coming from that gaping mouth of his.

It was amazing how such a large head could produce such a horrendous noise. Then again, his head _was_ significantly larger than the others of his kind.

As I sat up and rubbed my eyes, I picked up on the disgusting smell of pizza. Sure enough, there in front of me was a plate with a few pizza crusts on it. The Dib actually had one cold piece on his lap as he slept. Gross.

Sometimes I couldn't help but wonder what human foods tasted like. Curiosity was a natural instinct for Irken's, just as I'm sure it was for the Dib's kind too. I had tried to eat pizza in the past, but I was only sick afterwards as a result. I'd hoped maybe it was a one-time thing, but it wasn't. My squeedily-spooch couldn't handle foreign foods. In a way, I was jealous of the Dib for that. Foods he could so openly eat without a care in the world, I would never be able to indulge in. I could never experience human cuisine without harming myself. It was unfair in a way. I didn't care about my diet. Not that it bothered me very much, but I couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to eat something besides junk food.

Maybe there was a way to. I just had to figure it out.

Careful not to disturb the Dib, I wriggled out from beside him and set my feet onto his carpet. That pain in my stomach was back again. I didn't feel sick, but it was bothering me to the point I couldn't sleep. Dib had said we could go back to the base before. Looks like that wasn't happening anytime soon. It was well past midnight according to my PAK and I wasn't in the mood to make my way back to the base at this time.

I didn't expect to see the Dib sister staring at me as I exited the hyooman's bedroom. She didn't scare me, but I hesitated. A moment or so later, she walked over to me.

"So. Still here I see. What's the deal with you and my brother?"

Had she been waiting for me to leave? It seemed that way. Though, I wasn't exactly leaving.

"Why?"

She shrugged. "I dunno. I just want to know if my brother is gay or not."

I stared at her. I was unsure if the Dib cared about her knowing or not. I figured she'd find out about us sooner or later. I had to give the Gaz-sibling credit. She was smart.

"Yes. The Dib loves me. I love him too." I told her. She just stared at me.

I stared back at her. Was her silence a good or bad thing? I readied my PAK legs just in case she was about to punch me. Instead, she just shook her head slightly.

"I knew he was a xenophile."

I tilted my head. "Wha...?"

She looked at me, crossing her arms and leaning against the doorframe.

"Has a thing for something or someone foreign. You're an alien. So that makes him a xenophile. My brother is gay for an alien."

I frowned. "So?"

She shrugged. "Just don't hurt him or anything, Zim. He's an idiot and I want to kick his head in sometimes, but he's my brother still."

I was about to respond to that, but she turned and kicked shut her door in my face. I stood for a moment in surprise. I'd never even thought the Gaz-sibling would even give the slightest damn about the Dib. Perhaps I was wrong.

I had been wrong about the Dib, after all. For so many years he'd wanted to see me cut open on an autopsy table, but all along, he just wanted to be with me. And I had accepted that. I was still having a hard time believing that Dib and I were mated now, but perhaps that's just how things were supposed to be. Clearly I had never belonged with my own kind being the defective I was.

But the main thing was that now I was happy. So was he. Maybe that's what Gaz wanted for the Dib. Him to be happy.

I'd learned in the past that hyooman's had bizarre ways of expressing their emotions. Unlike us Irken's, they resorted to a variety of emotions instead of just getting straight to the point. They'd hide underneath anger or resentment. Violence in some cases. It was ridiculous.

Gaz was always angry. I had yet to see her happy.

But, I could tell she cared for her brother. He'd raised her. I'm glad she did.

Staring at her door for a moment or so longer, I sighed before finally turning to head into the bathroom again. Shutting the door behind me, I switched on the light and looked at myself in the mirror above the sink.

A gaunt, tired Irken stared back at me. I had never felt stress before, but ever since coming to Earth all those years ago I'd learnt how to. The Dib had caused me a lot of stress, but now I didn't need to worry about that anymore.

Elliot was the one I had to worry about. My fists clenched so hard I almost drew blood.

_Damn_ that stupid hyooman.

"Zim?"

I turned slightly at hearing the sleepy voice from the doorway. Dib was staring at me, rubbing his eyes. When I didn't answer him straight away, he walked inside towards me and looked at my fists. I hadn't even heard him open the door. I'd been so wound up in my thoughts. Maybe I just hadn't been as alert as I usually am. I was tired.

Or maybe I was losing my touch.

"Are you alright? What are you doing in here?" Dib looked at me. He had his glasses off, and a pair of brown eyes gazed at me.

I sighed. He held my hands gently and looked at me after inspecting the dig marks.

"Couldn't sleep."

"Worried about Elliot?" he asked. He knew me too well.

I nodded.

He gave me a sad smile. "Zim, I was true to my word when I said I'd protect you."

"I know..." I responded. I didn't want to tell him the real reason I'd come into the bathroom. My stomach was killing me. I wouldn't show discomfort though. Irken's were taught not to show pain and my PAK regulated my pain levels.

"I know, Dib-pet." I told him. He laughed slightly at that response.

"Come on Zim, let's go back."

I nodded, trying to ignore the nagging sensation inside my squeedily-spooch. Somehow, something was wrong. I didn't know what it was, but something just didn't feel right. Dib put his arm around me and led me back into his bedroom.

As he made his way over to the bed and collapsed onto it, I looked behind me slightly to see Gaz watching us as we passed by. Dib hadn't noticed. He probably would never notice the random moments his sister stared at him.

We stared at each other for a moment or so, before she shut her door again.

Shaking my head, I shut the door once more, and went over to lie down beside Dib. He'd already fallen back asleep and was producing more of those horrible snoring noises. I smirked. Hyooman's tired so easily.

I just hoped that GIR and Minimoose were doing okay without me. I hated leaving the two alone for long periods of time, knowing the destruction they caused.

That _stupid_ moose.

Dib-pet snored louder than usual that night. I groaned and held my antennae. At least he was off in some kind of dreamland, or whatever it was he saw behind those closed eyes of his.

I wanted to sleep, but sleep wouldn't come to me. Irken's usually didn't need much sleep, but now that I'd become accustomed to stress my body demanded more of it from me. Stupid PAK. Maybe I was malfunctioning.

Or maybe I was starting to accept that I had changed from the Irken I once was.

I actually cared about the Dib now. I was unveiling an emotion that had been alien to me for so long, but now it felt like it had been something I'd harnessed since my creation. It had just been shut away for so long, and Dib had brought it out. Of all the creatures in the universe, the one that had wanted me dead had shown me how to care. How to love. How to be who I wanted to be.

As Dib-pet slept, I stared at him just as Gaz had stared at me just before. I had started to understand why Gaz stared at her brother. It was hard to work out a hyooman from the inside. But, it was even harder to do so on the outside. I had noticed Gaz staring at the Dib multiple times in the past. I'd never said anything to him about it. I figured it wasn't my thing to say, and besides, we'd hated each other back then.

Gaz stared at him because it was her way of caring. Hyooman's were strange creatures.

I smiled as I finally managed to settle down for some rest, the pain in my stomach fading for the time being. I wondered if the Dib had ever noticed when I'd stared at him in the past.

Because, he'd stared at me all the time.


End file.
